Mom insists her former barista daughter make Starbucks drinks for 15+ members of her extended family, scolds her when she refuses: 'My mom is upset, saying I embarrassed her'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Dec 3, 2024 8:00 PM EST

Nobody wants to bring their work home with them. It doesn't matter if you're working on an oil rig, in retail, or even in radiology: time off from work is not when you want to be doing your job for free for family members. It's undoubtedly one thing to willingly cook a Michelin star-level meal for your loved ones on Thanksgiving or Christmas because you're a chef who wants to do something nice for your family, but it's a whole other thing for your family to insist that you do it because making such a meal would be easy for you anyways. 

That situation is nearly precisely what happened to the former barista in this story. After eating Thanksgiving dinner with her family, her mom told everyone that she was going to make Starbucks drinks for dessert for the whole family, despite never asking her if she would do this before this announcement. 

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10436700160
    via Shaan Ahmed
  • 02
    AITA for refusing to make Starbucks drinks for my family on Thanksgiving?
    via u/CapitalAlarming
  • 03
    I (28F) worked at Starbucks for a little over two years, and ever since then, my family has loved asking me to recreate their favorite drinks at home. I don't mind doing it once in a while, but it's not exactly my favorite thing—especially because I don't have all the equipment or supplies that Starbucks has.
    via u/CapitalAlarming
  • 04
    This Thanksgiving, my mom hosted dinner and invited a bunch of extended family. After we finished eating, she casually announced, “Okay, everyone, [my name] will be making Starbucks drinks for dessert!" I was totally blindsided. Apparently, she had bought a bunch of syrups, whipped cream, and even a little espresso machine just for this.
    via u/CapitalAlarming
  • 05
    When I said I didn't really feel like making drinks for 15+ people, my mom got super annoyed and said, "It's not that hard for you -you used to do this all the time at work!" A few of my cousins started chiming in too, saying it would be fun and that they'd help. But I didn't come to Thanksgiving to play barista for the whole family, so I stood my ground.
    via u/CapitalAlarming
  • 06
    Now my mom is upset, saying I embarrassed her after she went out of her way to buy all the supplies. Some of my family thinks I was being selfish and that it wouldn't have taken that long. But I just wanted to enjoy the holiday, not work for it.
    via u/CapitalAlarming
  • 07
    kberson • 14h ago • When entitled people don't get what they want, they call you selfish. You're NTA, but your mom certainly is for not talking to you about first.
    via u/kberson
  • 08
    CapitalAlarming OP Exactly!!!!
    via u/CapitalAlarming
  • 09
    Brief Calendar4455 Should have discussed it with you beforehand.
    via u/Brief_Calendar4455
  • 10
    CoraZane yeah, exactly, springing that on you in the moment wasnt fair, its one thing if youd agreed beforehand, but doing it like that kinda made it feel like an obligation instead of something fun
    via u/CoraZane
  • 11
    ashkebane NTA. She shouldn't have blindsided you like that.
    via u/ashkebane
  • 12
    lolly1128 My brother makes a special after-dinner concoction, usually for Christmas. It's his choice when he does it and he only makes it for a few people at small gatherings. If we want the specialty drink, we ask for it ahead of time, and if he says "no, not tonight," we don't get bent out of shape about it.
    via u/lolly1128
  • 13
    tsscaramel NTA. Nobody likes bringing their work home, if your mother wants it so badly she can learn how to do it herself.
    via u/tsscaramel
  • 14
    username-generica NTA When I worked at Starbucks I'd come home smelling like coffee grounds. The last thing I wanted to do is make drinks for people outside of work.
    via u/username-generica
  • 15
    _s1m0n_s3z OP should offer to teach her. She now has all the supplies and gear. But not while there are guests present.
    via u/_s1m0n_s3z
  • 16
    Unfair-Board-7728 NTA - I'm a hairstylist... I'm ALWAYS asked to bring my shears with me to every occasion. I feel this in my soul.
    via u/Unfair-Board-7728
  • 17
    PlantsnStamps Your mom embarrassed herself by volunteering you to work at family gathering, asking people to help clean up and cook-fine thats normal but don't expect someone to come do what they do for a living for you for free. Like if you were a therapist I don't think she'd be ponying up free threapy sesssions for and giggles at a paty. NTA.
    via u/PlantsnStamps
  • 18
    CapitalAlarming OP EXACTLY MY THOUGHTS?!
    via u/CapitalAlarming
  • 19
    Always_B_Batman It's a lot easier to make drinks with the proper equipment. It's totally different when you have to "Mickey Mouse" things to make the drinks. NTA
    via u/Always_B_Batman
  • 20
    linandlee Plus, it's not like mom asked OP to make 15 mint mochas. That would be a lot of work, but doable if mom had asked OP ahead of time and made sure to have the right ingredients/supplies. There's no way mom outfitted herself with an entire Starbucks worth of sh...
    via u/linandlee
  • 21
    It sounds like she just bought some torani syrups and demanded that OP play Starbucks, which sounds unrealistic. All the coffees would have come out at different times, something would be missing from the pantry for most things... it wouldn't have even been good!
    via u/linandlee
  • 22
    Cours19411a NTA. Thanksgiving is for turkey and pie, not turning you into the family barista! If they want Starbucks, there's literally an app for that. You were there to enjoy your time off, not clock in for a shift. Maybe next holiday hand out aprons as gifts and turn the tables see how they like it.
    via u/Cours19411a
  • 23
    _s1m0n_s3z Now my mom is upset, saying I embarrassed her.. Her plan was to put you on the spot and embarrass you into doing something she must know you dislike doing. You were surprised into embarrassing her. She premeditated embarrassing you for manipulative purposes. NTA.
    via u/_s1m0n_s3z

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family drama barista thanksgiving Starbucks reddit story desserts coffee extended family dessert family food reddit thread daughter Reddit mom
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