Mother-in-law staying with family for the holidays re-tags all gifts to be from herself: 'She told me that I’m ruining Christmas'

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Dec 25, 2024 12:00 PM EST

Gift-giving is a socially complex affair with a lot of wrapped layers to it. There's the expectation of the level of gift you're going to be giving someone: what it's going to say and how much it's going to cost, along with the symbolism of that gift and what it's going to mean to the other person. Of course, a great gift often won't be the most expensive but might be the most heartfelt or one that meets the laid-out expected qualities that your relationship with that person dictates. And it all depends on context—a handwritten note from a secret admirer will often be sweet, while photos of you eating your lunch taken with a telephoto lens from across the park often won't be.

And, well—my grandma gave great gifts. I still have a great many of the gifts she got me a quarter of a century later. This grandmother and mother-in-law, however, took it upon herself to label all the gifts that her grandchildren's parents had gotten them with her own name, "From: Grandma." At a certain age, you're old enough to know whether or not something is wrong, and 71 is certainly that age. While it seems ridiculous enough, it's enough to make you wonder whether or not she just never learned not to behave in this way or whether there's something else going on here.

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  • 02
    AITA for telling my mother in law not to place her own gift tags on Christmas presents i ordered for MY children? so basically i had ordered all my children's christmas presents online to be sent to my in-laws home, as we are spending christmas there this year, my mother in law said that she didn't mind wrapping them all up before we all got there, we arrived here yesterday and all
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  • 03
    was well, after the kids got settled in their room i got a chance to ask her about the presents, she told me that they were mostly all wrapped with just a couple she needed to finish off and that they were stored in their basement, i did ask if she needed a hand finishing the rest off, but she insisted that i should rest after our journey, so i rejoined my husband in
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  • 04
    the sitting room, a couple hours later she had gone to take a nap, so i went down to their basement to see how many had been wrapped and like she said there were some still left to wrap but as i was checking some of the bigger presents i noticed that they already had gift tags taped to them, when i flipped the tags they read "from
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  • 05
    grandma" on not just one, but on all of the bigger ones so i immediately went and told my husband about what i just found n he said that his mum had asked if she could put a few of her tags on as she "didn't want to disappoint her grandsons" my husband agreed that she could and told me that it isn't a big deal and that this is the only time we will be spending Christmas over at theirs (as they live 4hours away) i'm
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  • 06
    mad that most of the bigger presents are things that i had pre ordered for a long time and put a lot of thought into and had some toys personalised with their name (which costed a lot of money) anyways my mother in law came back downstairs from her nap so i basically told her that i don't think it's right for her to just do that without asking me also, she got super upset
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  • 07
    and told me that i was being selfish and the tried guilt tripping by saying this could be one of the last Christmas's she will have, she's old but she's not that old (71) she told me that i'm ruining christmas already, idk i'm trying my best to appear as nothing is wrong around my kids, i do feel bad and that i maybe overreacted, i don't know what to do, should i leave her tags on and apologise or put my own tags on and tell her she should have bought more?? this is turning into a nightmare
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  • 08
    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a hole: shouted at my mother in law over gift tags and i don't want to upset my family for being u reasonable
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  • 09
    AgitatedDot9313 • 13h ago. NTA, she is overstepping here and taking advantage of a situation. What did she actually get the grandkids?? She shouldnt have asked your husband as we was well aware she did that just to circumvent you. Clearly you were the one she organized everything to do with the presents with until she decided she wanted to put her name on things. Very deceptive of that your her and really husband didnt tell you right away, even if he was okay with it. Maybe he should help more w
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  • 10
    Sudden-Pomegranat... Are you joking???? RIP those gift tags off and tell MIL she can buy her own gifts if she doesn't want to disappoint them. This is beyond cheeky and I can guarantee she's rifled through the presents and chosen the biggest most expensive ones to present from grandma. ABSOLUTELY NOT. Your husband is a massive AH and the fact they've discussed this behind your back is downright manipulative. I'm actually so angry on your behalf.
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christmas gifts presents mother gift giving grandma in laws mother in law family grandparents mom
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