Dad allows his 5 and 7-year-old kids to open their Christmas presents before their mom woke up at 8:30, mom screams and cries at her husband: 'I was completely deprived of the joy of seeing their faces when they open their presents'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Dec 26, 2024 12:00 PM EST

I come from an open one-Christmas present-at-a-time family. I'm sure that that statement fills many of you with a shudder. I've seen so many posts about the horror of marrying into an everyone watches you for your reaction while you open your present family, but I cannot imagine doing it any other way. We only have five people at our family Christmas, so it would be a little silly not to extend the process of opening presents for as long as we can. Yesterday, I asked my parents if we did it that way when we were little kids as well, and apparently, we did! I guess that goes to show that kids can have self-control around presents if that is what's modeled to them from an early age. 

One dad decided that waiting for his wife to wake up to watch their kids open presents wasn't his priority, and it had dire consequences for his wife. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10447289600
    via Kateryna Hliznitsova (Unsplash+)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    Kids opened their presents without me
    via u/germangirrl
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    My husband is usually a great husband and father, but I am so effing ped right now. I don't think I've ever been this mad. I woke up this morning around 8:30 when I heard the kids running around. I knew they would be eager to open their Christmas presents so I got up immediately.
    via u/germangirrl
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    I have a lot of trouble sleeping for various reasons so my husband lets me sleep in every morning and watches the kids until I wake up naturally or I have to get up to help get the kids ready for the day. He's alone with them for half an hour to an hour. He knows what time to wake me up if I oversleep.
    via u/germangirrl
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    So I come into the living room and there is wrapping paper everywhere. All the presents are already unwrapped and the kids (5 and 7) are playing with them. I immediately started crying and walked back into the bedroom where my sadness also turned into anger, and I started screaming like crazy. I am so, so mad. I spent so much time,
    via u/germangirrl
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    thinking about what to get the kids, ordering it or driving around to find it in the stores, wrapping them and everything, and I feel like I was completely deprived of the joy of seeing their faces when they open their presents, which is one the best parts of Christmas. My husband said he videotaped it. I screamed at him why he either couldn't make the kids
    via u/germangirrl
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    wait, or he could've just come and woken me up. He just said "I never wake you up in the morning" I said "it's Christmas morning. You didn't think I wanted to watch the kids unwrap the presents" and I called him an a hole.
    via u/germangirrl
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    He just said sorry, he didn't say I overreacted. I'm really hurt right now and I don't even know how to get over it. I don't feel like doing anything Christmasy today. I'm so disappointed in everybody.
    via u/germangirrl

  • It's nice to see that her husband didn't dismiss her feelings. She had a right to be upset about this, and he didn't take that right to be upset away from her. 

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    I guess this was more of a rant to get this off my chest, but you can certainly tell me if I was the ah_le or not. Also, if you have any suggestions on how to mediate my hurt feelings, that would be really great. I hope you all have a merry Christmas.
    via u/germangirrl
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    I guess this was more of a rant to get this off my chest, but you can certainly tell me if I was the a hole or not. Also, if you have any suggestions on how to mediate my hurt feelings, that would be really great. I hope you all have a merry Christmas.
    via u/germangirrl
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    Edit: people seem to think that I cried and screamed and cursed in front of my children. I did not! | intentionally went into the bedroom to have a good cry. I wasn't expecting to get so angry that I was screaming. My husband
    via u/germangirrl
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    heard me and came into the room, so yes, I did scream at him and I did call him an a h le. I wish I had the same self control as so many in the comments that can control their strong emotions.
    via u/germangirrl
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    Tessie 1966 20h ago • Our rule for Christmas morning with our kids was always wait until mom and dad get up and make coffee before opening presents. They learned how to make coffee at an early age to speed up the process.
    via u/Tessie1966
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    TerraelSylva My parents had that rule. My brother and I would wake up at like 4 or 5 am, and stare at the presents like starving animals until 8 AM, when we were allowed to make the coffee (literally just turning the machine on, it was set the night before) and wake them up.
    via u/TerraelSylva
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    Even when very young, neither of us would have opened our presents without both parents being there. I honestly enjoyed watching them open our presents as young as I can remember. Plus, we had our post presents family Nerf war as soon as the last present was opened.
    via u/TerraelSylva
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    I totally understand OP's reaction. I know how much effort my Mom put into Christmas. It was basically a full-time job in December. I would probably react the same in that situation.
    via u/TerraelSylva
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    Current-Photo2857 Info: Your kids are 5 and 7; this isn't your first family Christmas. What has happened on previous years? I'm assuming you didn't sleep through them?
    via u/Current-Photo2857
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    germangirrl OP This has never been an issue before. In the past, I was either up when the kids were up or they waited to open the presents, so I didn't think it would be different this year.
    via u/germangirrl
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    Becsbeau1213 • 17h ago • For what it's worth my (now) 6&7 year old opened most of their gifts last year before they woke us up they were really quiet and a little sneaky about it. I was really sad, I told them they I was really sad and explained why I was really sad. This year I reminded them that it made me really sad that they opened their presents without me last year and asked them to make sure they woke us up and they did. Your kids are old enough for you to have a conversation as to why it
    via u/Becsbeau1213
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    wanked_in_space Even if it were a recurring problem, how does that change things? It's not like you're some lazy person who doesn't do anything, then wakes up late. You made Christmas happen, then didn't get to enjoy it. Your husband is a hugej and should
    via u/wanked_in_space
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    be ashamed of himself. Don't let him weasel out of this. And when he complains that you're reminding him to make sure you're up for the present opening every remind him about this year. year, you can You are NTA. Your husband is. And your kids kind of are, too, to be honest. Both are old enough to know better.
    via u/wanked_in_space
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    Incognito0925 NTA but, since you're German AND have trouble sleeping (and probably being awake in the morning), I would consider going back to your roots and opening presents on the evening of the 24th. That way you can't miss it and you pass on a bit of your cultural heritage to your kids. That's just a suggestion of course and I know that Ratschläge sind auch Schläge
    via u/Incognito0925
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    IntelligentDot4794 • 22h ago • Dad was inconsiderate. The kids could have been told they could open one and then they have to help make breakfast and wake mom when it is ready. I bet mom is mostly angry because she is expected to do all the work but she is not included in any of the fun.
    via u/IntelligentDot4794
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    Low-Buy-2421 • 20h ago • 1,000% Dad needs to understand how much work went into it by Mom, and the kids need to understand it's not all about ripping the paper off and they can be considerate of Mom and all her hard work. My kid knows to wait if he wakes up first. And if he wants to wake me up he's more than welcome to.
    via u/Low-Buy-2421
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    If people do not understand why Mom "went crazy", then they have no idea how much work it takes to coordinate a successful Christmas, not just in her home but I'm sure relatives and in laws, too. It's a huge feat to bring Christmas together and many overlook the mental labor it takes. Also their righteousness of never losing their cool is insane. She's an adult, yes, but also a human being with feelings. She isn't a robot.
    via u/Low-Buy-2421
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    I would be devastated missing it all. It was such a ding dong move to not think "Gee, Mom might want to see this, let me tell the kids to hold on for a few while I go get her." I'm sorry, OP.
    via u/Low-Buy-2421
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    WeAreTheMisfits • 19h ago • My friend just posted about how she has been awake since 2:54am filling stockings, setting up some special chocolate kisses trail that Santa made when he delivered the gifts, setting stuff up for the Christmas magic. Her kids are teenagers now and don't believe in Santa and she is still doing an amazing amount of work on no sleep to make a special Christmas. Have no idea if her husband helped or got to sleep.
    via u/WeAreTheMisfits
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    The amount of work you must have put into to Christmas is tremendous while he just gets to enjoy it. Remember last years big tik tok video of a woman who had an empty stocking because her husband didn't fill it. And all of the terrible presents they receive. I'd be furious. So inconsiderate.
    via u/WeAreTheMisfits
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    gringaellie My husband slept in this morning. I told him at 9.45am that if he wasn't up by 10am, the kids would be opening their presents without him. The kids had been up since 7am looking at the presents. They know they have to wait for both parents, and have done since they were toddlers.
    via u/gringaellie

  • There's a big difference between kids waiting until 8:30 to open presents and 10. Most kids on Christmas wake up sometime between 5-7 AM, and asking them to wait an hour before their parent is ready is pretty standard. I understand that it can be hard to say no at this age, but he wouldn't be saying no; he'd be saying, “Wait.”

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    13surgeries The difference is you went to tell him, so obviously you woke him up. That's very different from what the OP's husband did.
    via u/13surgeries
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    pamemake 22h ago • I understand your anger. I do not understand you acting like a child. You took something bad and made it worse. What your husband did was wrong, (in my opinion), and you went and doubled down. Now you are going to punish everyone all day long and make Christmas miserable. Grow up.
    via u/pamemake

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christmas family drama presents kids mother christmas gifts gift christmas presents parenting dad sleep family mom sleeping parents children Father
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