Couple surprises parents with 10-day Italy vacation, 15-year-old sister throws a fit when she's not invited despite it being an adults-only trip: 'My parents have put us in an impossible situation'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Dec 31, 2024 3:00 PM EST

Going on vacation with your young child is not truly a vacation. You're still "on duty," so to speak. You're still responsible for their day-to-day needs, even if you happen to be out of town while doing so. There is a time and a place for this kind of family vacation. Maybe you pick a spot that has a kid's center, or somewhere with lots of activities for teens, so a little of the burden is lifted. But every trip doesn't have to be a kid-friendly trip. Sometimes parents just need a full-on break from their parental duties. They want to explore a new place, enjoy their time, and let the babysitter worry about the kids. 

That was the intention of a young couple who wanted to gift both sets of their parents some time away from their younger children. But it didn't exactly go off without a hitch. Read on for the story and see what you think. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10448696064
    via Vidar Nordli-Mathisen

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    AITA for surprising my parents with a trip to Italy and telling them my little sister cannot come?
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    AITA for surprising my parents with a trip to Italy and telling them my little sister cannot come? My wife and I are finally at a place in our lives where we can show appreciation to our parents. Right when we felt we could financially afford it, we decided to surprise
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    our parents (my mom and dad and her mom) with a trip to Italy. We wrapped up a small frame and wrote a card. On the day we were giving the present, my two younger sisters were present (15F and 20F). Both of our moms were over the moon receiving the gift but my little sister (15F)
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    immediately started crying saying that she always wanted to go to Italy and was upset she was not included. This present is meant to treat our parents to something special where they can relax for 10 days without taking care of another person. It is also a trip so that my wife and I can spend time
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    with them. My little sister made the moment about herself and then it lead to my mother immediately saying for her to come. My wife was upset from this as she looked forward to this moment, but it became shadowed by my little sister's response.
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    When my wife and I were deciding on this trip, our main goal was just for our parents to come. We wanted it to be an adult only trip and had already made plans for my other sisters (22F and 20F) to watch my 15 year old sister while we were gone. We offered our house if it was easier to watch her there. We told my parents that we
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    did not want my younger sister going as it goes against the purpose of the gift and felt she did not deserve to go with how she reacted when they opened the presents. My parents buckled down and said that if my younger sister could not come on the trip, they did not want to go. My mom
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    states that it is because she would be worried sick about being apart from my sister and she didn't want to be away from her for that long. It would make sense but my wife and I took my younger sister to Hawaii over the summer for 10 days, away from my parents, and they had no issue. We feel really
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    hurt because they are now making the gift more dramatic than it needs to be. We are wondering if we are being to hard headed or if we should just let my little sister come to save the trip. My little sister has not apologized for how she acted during the gift exchange and my parents make multiple
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    excuses for why she reacted in that way. We do not want to cancel the trip as it would be unfair to my wife's mom, but my parents have put us in an impossible situation. I either go to Italy with just my wife and her mom, or we go to Italy with my wife, my mom, my dad, and my younger sister.
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    EDIT: if my little sister were to go, my parents did say they would cover my sister's cost.
    via u/Smart_but_Stoopid
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    • ZeroZipZilchNad... 2h ago NTA. "Mom and Dad, we presented you and wife's mom with the trip to Italy as an opportunity for the adults to spend quality time together, just as we spent quality time with 15yo in Hawaii. We've planned activities and excursions for adults that may not be teen
    via u/ZeroZipZilchNadaNone
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    friendly. Wife and I are sad that you won't be able to join us this time. We'll miss you but maybe we can plan another trip later." A gift is a gift. They can accept or reject it. They don't get to negotiate or invite
    via u/ZeroZipZilchNadaNone
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    others. Your mother's "I won't go if 15yo can't" is a childish power play that's only making 15yo (more?) spoiled and entitled. If your mother is going to have a little kid tantrum, she needs to go to little kid time out i.e. no trip. Good luck! Enjoy your vacay!
    via u/ZeroZipZilchNadaNone
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    Majestic-Leopar... 3h ago Tell your parents to stay with her then and take your wife's mum NTA
    via u/Majestic-Leopard-563
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    HanaHavenly · 2h ago • . tell her: "Since you feel you can't be away from her, perhaps you could stay home with her while my wife and I take her mom to Italy." lol
    via u/HanaHavenly
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    . Sirlcy5798 2h ago Take your 20 and 22yo sisters with you instead and let your parents stay with the entitled brat.
    via u/Sirlcy5798
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    Vegetable-Cod-2340 2h ago • Top 1% Commenter • This... your sister is counting on your parents to cave so she can go. Cancel it and tell them if they want to take the entitled kid to Italy do on their own dime.
    via u/Vegetable-Cod-2340
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    Justthislazy • 3h ago. NTA just cancel your parents tickets. Enjoy your childfree vacation with your wife's mom. Maybe get them some souvenirs as a replacement gift.
    via u/Justthislazy
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    . Throwaway2012 3h ago • This is a power play, stand your ground and say no. See if your older 2 sisters want to go or cancel your parents part of the trip and just go with your wife and family.
    via u/Throwaway2012_
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    FunnyEfficient11... . 3h ago NTA- if your mother takes. that stance then invite your oldest sisters in their place and it will remain an adult only trip. Your 15yr old sister needs to realize everything is not about her and she can't always get her way. 10 days all expenses paid, already spent in Hawaii, how many 15yr olds can say that. (excluding those who live there) your sister is a spoiled brat.
    via u/FunnyEfficient1108
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    MTClarity 3h ago Just take your MIL and the rest can stew.
    via u/MTClarity
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    Big-Tomorrow2187 3h ago NTA... Personally, I would say fine if you don't wanna go on a child free vacation that's paid for that's fine and I would cancel her tickets. Enjoy your child free vacation with the other parents that will actually want to spend time with you.
    via u/Big-Tomorrow2187
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    FloMoJoeBlow • 3h ago If mom & dad want to take the spoiled 15-year-old to Italy, then they can take her on a separate trip... and pay for it themselves.
    via u/FloMoJoeBlow
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    • Sea_Firefighter_... 3h ago. NTA. Tell them you understand and cancel the tickets. Take your wife's mom and enjoy yourselves.
    via u/Sea_Firefighter_4598

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childcare teens aita Italy kids teenagers moms parenting dad cute kids trip reddit thread parent Reddit raising kids Parenting Fail family vacation parents children vacation Parenting FAILS
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