Helicopter parents pressure 35-year-old son to stay home and turn down a better job offer: '[It pays] $23k more than my last job'

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Ben Weiss • Writer and Editor
Jan 27, 2025 8:00 AM EST

Some parents simply do not know what's best for their children. It's important to remember that there are people in this world at any age who tend to act out of their own self-interest first and foremost. This personality trait can be an empowering one in some instances, but it can be incredibly damaging in other circumstances, especially when the best interests of loved ones are discarded in the process.

Believe it or not, there is a time and a place when listening to your parents can only cause harm to oneself. Many of us learn this during our adolescent and emerging adulthood years, but it's never too late to have this epiphany, even if you're 35 years old and still living at home like this man. Check out his story of family drama and, ultimately, growth.

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    Cheezburger Image 10459251712
    via Zach Reiner

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Confronting one's parents about their selfishness can be intimidating, but there is no better scenario to do it than when your best interests are objectively at stake. This 35-year-old man was recently let go at his old company over the holidays and was staying with his parents for the time being (along with his older sister). Clearly, his parents enjoyed this arrangement and were actively looking for new opportunities in the area for their son. However, he didn't want to stay in Kansas forever, and there were few opportunities within his field in the town in which they lived.

    When he finally received a great opportunity in Denver that would pay significantly more than his prior salary, his parents disapproved of the idea simply because he would have to move away from them.

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    I'm 35, got fired from my last job right before the holidays with zero explanation. Two weeks later I got an offer in Denver for $83k ($23k more than my last job) but my parents yell saying
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    "It's too expensive! $83,000 isn't that much, not enough to live anywhere else but here." "It's too cold!"
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    "What are you going to do with your house??" "If you sell you'll never afford to buy another home!"
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    "If you rent it out and the job doesn't work, you won't have a place to go back to!" "If you rent it out, whoever you rent to will destroy your property!"
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    "Where are you going to put your stuff if you rent it out??" They want me to turn this opportunity down (which means staying on unemployment until something else comes up or that sh*t runs out), stay put and keep looking for local jobs in Kansas.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
  • 07
    My dad sent me a job posting for an administrative assistant at a local university for $15k less than I was making at my last job. I've been a project manager for 7 years, an admin assistant job photocopying some old dude's documents, arranging his folders,
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    scheduling his meetings, sounds like a huge step back to me. That is a job I would hate and I am overqualified for. He shouted at me I was II applying for it. stupid" for not
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Meanwhile my sister is turning 38 and has never moved out of my parents' house and doesn't drive herself anywhere (mom drives her to AND from work every day) which they have no problem with.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Why aren't they questioning what is she doing with her life? They're so hands-off when it comes to her life choices.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Cheezburger Image 10459251456
    via Paul Kapischka

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    What's crazier is their talk is making me second guess my new gig. I turned down a job in Boston two years because of this type of pressure, and looked what happened to me. I took a pay cut and then got fired. Now I'm thinking about to doing it again.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    There's no support for me whatsoever. They say I'm gonna fail and not have anything to come back to. I'm all torn up about their behavior and doubting.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259

  • Several members of the online community shared their reactions to this poor guy's story, urging him to follow his ambitions and to draw lasting boundaries with his parents as soon as possible. Here is what they had to say about this!

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    parkesc Starting now, don't tell them anything. Make all your preparations and leave as quietly as possible.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    PHLSchwarmer Take the job, shut everything down, and leave your family (and Kansas) behind. Your reward will start with the ever-decreasing view of all that nonsense in the rear- view mirror of your life. Good luck in Denver!
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    ThginkAccbeR Just go. Be the adult you are.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Initial-Shop-8863 Everyone gets 1 life in this world. Your parents get to control theirs. You get yours. They don't get to have or control your life too... unless. you want them to.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Live your life. Try to ignore their trying to control yours and use you as their local security blanket. Do what's right for you.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    brianozm If you rent out your place, you still own it and could eventually move back into it, if you come back. Use a good property manager to manage it and don't let your parents near it.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Magdovus Ah well, looks like they're on an info diet from now. Live your life.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
  • 21
    committedlikethe... One of the things that's hardest to learn in life is not to share your good news with everyone. And in your case- especially your parents.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Keep putting those big girl pants on and take the job. Denver is an awesome city with lots of opportunities. You can't stay their little girl forever.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259
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    Why don't your parents still live with their parents? Because they had to be an adult at some point in their life and have responsibilities.
    via Agitated_Pudding7259

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family drama job work parenting entitled people karma family job interview Parenting Fail entitled people Parenting FAILS
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