13-year-old girl ruins 16-year-old cousin's books, mother refuses to pay for them: 'She destroyed my daughter's property and she needs to know that her actions have consequences'

Author image for Baiz Hoen
Baiz Hoen
Feb 13, 2025 1:00 PM EST

Some say that people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Then, there are people who come into our lives simply to test us. They could be here to test our patience, our morals, our sense of self. Sometimes, the test is as simple as knowing a person is just not worth your time, space, or energy. Whatever the case, everyone faces an instance when they have to rise to the occasion and come out of an interaction different from the one they were before.

Sometimes these people come at us with double the trouble, which is what happened to one woman and her daughter. This woman's daughter is a real bookworm and spends her hard-earned allowance on rare books. So when her cousin returns one of these books in bad condition, both this woman and her daughter decide that she doesn't need to lend them to her anymore. Things seemed fine between everyone until this woman's niece came over one day and destroyed her daughter's books. Not only was her daughter in shambles, but her sister refused to understand what damage her own daughter did. Would you tell your sister to pay your daughter back for the ruined books? Or is this bridge best left unburned?

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  • 01
    Proverbs
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    "AITHA for making my sister pay back my daughter?"

    My (42f) daughter Brooke (16) has been reading since she was five. She has always loved books and she would spend her allowance that we gave her on the newest book in the latest series that she was reading. It's pretty safe to say that her book collection is huge and filled with all kinds of limited edition and special edition books.
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    Recently she used her allowance to get a new special edition version of a book she already had because she has been saving up for it and was very excited to get it when it came out.
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    Well my sister Lindsey (36) came over on Saturday with her daughter Mariah (13) to spend time with us because it's been a while since we got to hang out and we were just catching up. Mariah started to head to Brooke's room but I stopped her and told her that Brooke was out and she would be home in twenty minutes so I suggested that she wait down here with us and tell me about how school was going.
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    She talked for about ten minutes before she said that she had to go to the bathroom. We have two bathrooms in our house, one upstairs and one downstairs (not including our en suite.). Unfortunately the downstairs one is having some issues so I told her that it was ok to use the one upstairs for now until the one downstairs is fixed. She said ok and went upstairs.
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    While I was talking to my sister Brooke came home, said hi and quickly went upstairs to change. She wasn't up there for five minutes when I heard a loud scream and quickly ran to check on my daughter. When I got to her room my jaw dropped when I saw several of her books (including the new special edition one) destroyed with ripped pages everywhere and Brooke in tears at the destruction.
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    Brooke is very non controversial and hates arguing or fighting with people, so I stepped in for her. I told Mariah that she needs to apologize to Brooke, clean up the mess she made and that she would no longer be welcomed in my house. I then turned to my sister and told her that she needed to reimburse Brooke for the books that her daughter destroyed.
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    Lindsey argued with me that Mariah was just a kid and she didn't know what she was doing but I told her that Mariah is old enough to know right from wrong and what she did was wrong.
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    Lindsey argued back that if my daughter didn't want her books touched that they shouldn't have been out. I lost my cool and told her that they weren't out. They were put away in her room where Mariah wasn't allowed to be without Brooke's permission. Lindsey refused to pay Brooke back and called me a greedy b before leaving with Mariah right behind her.
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    I told my husband about this and he was absolutely on our side, and he agreed that Lindsey needs to pay Brooke back for the books that she lost and can't replace as they were special/limited edition that she can't get back. This whole
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    that she can't get back. This whole thing has really blown up and my side of the family is telling me that I'm being too hard on Mariah, that she's just a kid but I don't think I am. She destroyed my daughter's property and she needs to know that her actions have consequences. So I'm asking here. Was I the ah for demanding that my sister pay me back?
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  • 12

    Here's some more context for this story.

    ETA: I have seen some people ask and I'm going to add a bit of information. Mariah has always had a fascination with Brooke's book collection and last year Brooke let her borrow two books because Mariah said that she wanted to start reading and since Brooke loves reading so much she thought it was a good idea to let Mariah borrow a couple. Well two
    via AnnualHappy2923
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    Mariah borrow a couple. Well two weeks passed and the books came back damaged (nothing like this but definitely not in good condition anymore) so Brooke told her that she was not allowed to borrow her books anymore. Mariah was angry at that and yelled at my daughter and since then Brooke has kept Mariah away from her books. My
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    Mariah away from her books. My husband and I think this is what caused Mariah to do what she did to Brooke's books.
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    Everyone was on this woman's side in the comments.

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    via hansjuergen
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    Everyone also said that this woman's niece is way too old to be behaving this way.

    NTA A 13 year old? Wow. Even 5 year olds know better than that. Your family can off, hold your ground.
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    Why is everyone acting like Mariah is a toddler? She's 13, she 100% knew exactly what she was doing, and she did it on purpose. Your whole family sounds wacked. NTA.
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    NTA Regardless of their age, if a kid breaks/damages/steals/whate ver something, they are responsible for it. I don't care if the kid is 17 years or 17 weeks... their kid, their responsibility.
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    Also, a 13 year old is plenty old enough to know that you can't just destroy other people's stuff. That excuse ends at about age 7. Also, you'd already told her not to go in your daughter's room, so it's not like she wasn't aware that she was doing something wrong.
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    NTA. Mariah is old enough to know better, and your sister should take responsibility. Actions have consequences, and Brooke deserves to be reimbursed.
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    Some said this behavior calls for legal action.

    No way!! Sis would have to see me in court behind my child! And since family has so much to say they can pay for the damages. She a teenager and she more than knows better!
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  • 22
    Nah, ur 100% right. Mariah knew exactly what she was doing, and ur sister is just making excuses bec she doesn't wanna parent her kid. She def needs to pay Brooke back.
    via AnnualHappy2923

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