Couple brings 2-year-old to group vacation, friend goes 'no contact' and claims they ruined the trip: 'She's still bitter'

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Ben Weiss • Writer and Editor
Feb 13, 2025 8:00 AM EST

Organizing quality time with one's core friend group becomes harder and harder as everyone grows older. With more responsibilities at work and at home, it can be difficult to carve out that essential bonding time with the important people in your social circle. Still, that does not make that time any less important.

It's all about scheduling the time and holding oneself accountable for following up with one's friends. Now, some friends may want quality time with just you and not your partner or your children. Those needs should be met every once in a while; that being said, this one fully-grown adult took her needs a bit too far!

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  • 01
    "She insists that we ruined her trip by bringing him"
    via Unsplash+ (Natalia Blauth)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Here, we have a couple within a larger friend group. They had sorted out a mutually agreed-upon solution wherein they would bring their 2-year-old to their annual group vacation because another couple within the group needed to bring their kid as well. However, when that couple had to cancel at the last minute, one friend within the group began to throw shade at the central couple for choosing to bring their kid along for the trip still, even though they literally had no other option.

  • 02
    Me (29M) and my wife "Angie" (27F) have a son, "Sam" (turned 2 this week). We're part of a friend group made up of 7 people, including us. There is one more couple in this group. The other three are "Zoe" (32F), "Greg" (41M) and "Tim" (30M).
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  • 03
    Zoe doesn't like kids. She openly avoids them whenever she can. I've always known about this, and have no problem with it. There have, however, been occasions in which she seemed to take it a bit too far.
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    The friend group lives all over the country now, and most of us only get together once or twice a year. This January, we all decided to take a 5-day trip to Greg's beach house. It's in a different state, and a two-hour flight away.
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  • 05
    Both Greg and Tim have children. Greg made sure to invite us over while his kid would be with his ex, but Tim is a single father and couldn't afford to leave his daughter with a babysitter for 5 days.
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    Due to that, it was decided that both Tim's daughter and Sam were welcome on the trip. Angie and I offered to leave Sam with my mother-in-law, but the whole group, including Zoe, said it was fine. All of these decisions were made two months in advance.
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  • 07
    Two days prior to the trip, Tim informed us that his daughter had chicken pox, and he had to cancel their tickets to stay with her. At that, Zoe called Angie and said, "Guess your mom will have a busy week!"
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  • 08
    My MIL was traveling and wouldn't be back for another week. We had no other babysitting options available (or time to find one), so we told Zoe that we were still bringing Sam with us.
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    Zoe protested, saying that she was only okay with having kids around during the trip because she knew Tim had no choice, and
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    we had "no excuse" to bring Sam now that Tim's daughter wasn't coming anymore, but we held our ground. The others took our side.
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    During the trip, Angie and I made efforts to help Zoe avoid Sam as much as possible. This ended up making our own trip underwhelming, as we were spending a lot of time apart and didn't get to see our friends as much as we wanted to, but it worked.
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    Zoe and Sam were in the same room a total of four times, including both our arrival and departure from Greg's house. In spite of that, she insists that we ruined her trip by bringing him, and that it was selfish of us to not consider her feelings about children after Tim dropped out.
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    Zoe hasn't spoken to us since we flew back home. This week, she unfollowed Angie on Instagram 10 minutes after she made a post for Sam's 2nd birthday, so I think she's still bitter.
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  • 14
    Angie has been feeling guilty about this. I tried to reassure her we had no other option and it was unreasonable of Zoe to ask us to change our plans at the last minute like that, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't consider we might be in the wrong. AITA?
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    Cheezburger Image 10466958848
    via Unsplash+ (Natalia Blauth)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 16
    YouthNAsia63 • 18h ago Edited 18h ago Ya know what, sometimes you just can't change plans at the last minute, like pulling a trusted babysitter out of your but when you were led to believe till two days before that you wouldn't even need one at all. Sks for Zoe that she doesn't like kids. I don't like kids either, but, OP, you can't just stick your kid in a room at home with a litter box and an automatic feeding system. You had to bring your kid with you- as was the plan all along. Sks for Zoe.
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  • 17
    edit to add, My husband had a take on this-Zoe might have been accommodating for Tim and his daughter because Zoe might have a little thing for Tim. And since Tim dropped out, why would she want to put up with your kid cluttering up the beach house.
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    Plastic_Tea2094 OP • 18h ago "Trusted" is a key word here. We have the numbers of babysitters we trust, but we never left Sam with them for more than a few hours. The only person we trust to take care of him for that long is my MIL (my mom lives in a different state, FIL has never spent more than 4 hours alone with a toddler and my father is no longer with us).
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    owls_and_cardinals ⚫ 18h ago Soooo NTA. Zoe is wildly the AH here. It's a strange double standard for her to be understanding that Tim had no choice but not be willing to extend the same courtesy to you when Tim's plans had to change; from what you describe, you also had no choice at that point. What, did she expect you to predict with your magic ball that you should have your MIL on back-up duty just in case Tim's plans fell through? It's so
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    bogus. And as you said this was all decided months ago. Zoe is strangely entitled to think she should be able to call the shots in a group like that. If SHE decided having a kid around wasn't her cup of tea SHE should have skipped the trip. She seems to have some really negative and callous feelings towards you and maybe you're better off moving on from her as a friend.
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  • 21
    RachSlixi ⚫ 18h ago Edited 18h ago NTA. I'm not a big kid person. I'm 40 single and have a cat. Kids are not my thing. Being in the room with a kid shouldn't not ruin one's hour, much less their day or week. You also didn't have a choice. Your mother is not a s!…ve. She is not required to put her life on hold just in case you need a baby sitter. Even if she was availble, you weren't obliged to leave your son with with your mother.
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  • 22
    Next time Zoe complains, I'd be tempted to tell her that she has bigger tantrums than your son and if it is appropriate for her to be there with her childish behaviour, then it's perfectly fine for an actual child to be present.
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friendship aita drama kids friends friend drama entitled people karma couples entitled people vacation
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