Employee complains that she doesn't have a car to drive to and from work, assumes that her coworker will drive her home despite living in the opposite direction: 'Some coworkers think I was inconsiderate'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Feb 26, 2025 1:00 PM EST

One of my best friends is constantly getting ride offers. She lives in a less-than-walkable city with mediocre transit options, but she is lucky to live a 15-minute walk from her place of employment. She owns a car but would rather walk for 15 minutes than drive for 3 minutes every day. I'd venture to say walking to and from work increases her quality of life, but her coworkers and neighbors don't think so. Every day, her coworkers cannot believe that she would walk to work, especially during the winter. They treat her as if she is a Victorian street urchin who needs them to save her from a life of abject poverty. Last week, while she was walking to work, three of her neighbors pulled up to her and asked if they could offer her a ride. So many people cannot conceptualize a life where not driving to work is a feature and not a bug. 

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  • Not everybody is as willing to offer rides as my friend's neighbors and coworkers, and that's okay! The employee in this story was sympathetic to his coworker about her struggles taking the bus to work every day, but he was incredibly surprised when she took his sympathy as an offer for a ride. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10472992512
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITA for not giving my coworker a ride after she assumed I would?

    I drive to work every day, and a coworker who takes the bus casually mentioned how tough her commute is. I sympathized but never offered her a ride. One day, she just walked up to my car after work and said, "Ready to go?" like it was already a thing.
    via u/Safe_Writing6652
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    Cheezburger Image 10472992768
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    I was caught off guard and told her I wasn't going her way (which was true). She got upset and said I was being r_de for not helping when it was "easy" for me. Now, some coworkers think I was inconsiderate. AITA for not offering her a ride?
    via u/Safe_Writing6652
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    Cheezburger Image 10472996864
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 06
    Practical_Toucan I laughed a little bit at the 'ready to go?', since she clearly expected to stun you enough that you wouldn't refuse. NTA.
    via u/Practical_Toucan
  • 07
    RHND2020 It's kind of impressive. The chutzpah.
    via u/RHND2020
  • 08
    Dangerous_Touch_7081 NTA That's trashy af
    via u/Dangerous_Touch_7081
  • 09
    JustKindaHappenedxx Yup. She just assumed she could surprise and shame OP enough to be her driver. I'll bet if OP had gone along with it, she wouldn't have even offered money for gas and probably would have told OP what time to pick her up for her next shift (which she would again, assume OP was going to do instead of ask).
    via u/JustKindaHappenedxx
  • 10
    OP, you are not obligated to become the personal chauffeur for your carless coworkers. Anyone who gives you a hard time is welcome to take on the role if they want (of course they will all have excuses why they can't).
    via u/JustKindaHappenedxx
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    Safe_Writing6652 OP She never asked me first she just assumed I'd say yes. If she had asked nicely, I might have thought about it, but I don't like feeling forced just because I have a car. I also don't live near her, so it would take extra time. Now, work feels awkward.
    via u/Safe_Writing6652
  • 12
    Luxodad For the workers who feel you are inconsiderate, tell them to give her the rides.
    via u/Luxodad
  • 13
    Safe_Writing6652 OP Exactly! They can give her a ride if they want.
    via u/Safe_Writing6652
  • 14
    rocketmn69 Tell her that those other people offered to drive her
    via u/rocketmn69_
  • 15
    TerrorAlpaca call them out each and everytime they look dissaproving at you or mention it. "whats that look for? Still because i'm not giving colleague a ride? What about you? you also have a car. why are you voluntelling my car and don't step up, huh?
    via u/TerrorAlpaca
  • 16
    betterthanur2 She had zero idea if you had somewhere to be, like a doctor appointment. Ask the coworkers who thought you were r de, why they didn't give her a ride. I'm so tired of entitled people and then others thinking you should have done it to keep the peace. Had you given her a ride you suddenly would have been expected to do it every day. Sometimes being the j in other people's eyes is okay.
    via u/betterthanur2
  • 17
    Con4America I would have gone to the grocery store and completed an hour's worth of shopping then moved on to more errands.
    via u/Con4America
  • 18
    puddncake It always turns into I need you to stop here so I can just pick up something really quick. Or hey Op likes to give rides, they'll give you one, no worries. These people are basically strangers, and they want to get into a car with you. You really never know who you're dealing with. Just say no, it's my policy to not give rides.
    via u/puddncake
  • 19
    dunno0019 Dude. I spent many years in many different jobs on public transit. And the very first thing I do when asking for the rare occassional ride is: make sure the person Im asking is at least going in my direction. ffs, you dont ask your coworker that lives in the opposite direction from you!
    via u/dunno0019
  • 20
    Terrible_Kiwi_776 Is there any chance she's just really, really bad at flirting and was trying to get alone time with you?
    via u/Terrible_Kiwi_776
  • 21
    ktown247365 NTA but a great time to set up an office pool and pre assign all your office mates days of the week that they are assigned to drive her. Hey Cindy, since you were so upset about Janice's commute issues, you are now assigned to drive her to and from work every Thursday. I'm sure you have no issues with this, so thanks for taking this on. Jim, you are good with Tuesdays right, great. I've got Linda down for Mondays, Frank will be on Fridays and I'll cover Wednesdays, that is what you a
    via u/ktown247365
  • 22
    zwwafuz I would so do this! Coworkers are 99% of the time... not your friend!
    via u/zwwafuz
  • 23
    Revolutionary Diet686 NTA Ask anyone who has an opinion where they see Lyft, Uber, or Taxi on your car. Coworker is certainly acting entitled to your gas, time, and wear on your vehicle.
    via u/RevolutionaryDiet686
  • 24
    sprezzaturina She comes off as a user. She took an expression of sympathy and immediately upped it to a ride offer. If there was a miscommunication, she would have immediately said so. But rather she blamed you, which is essentially her pitching a fit bc you have boundaries. Don't feel bad at all. Work is work. It's not family (despite dysfunctional places always throwing that word around) and it is not friends (work-friends and friends are diff usually). Be professional, do your work and bounce
    via u/sprezzaturina
  • 25
    scotian 1009 Not to mention if you had an accident she would probably sue you. I used to give a coworker a drive then stopped when my insurance company said I would require car pool insurance to protect me.
    via u/scotian1009

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terrible coworkers workplace-stories employee carpool car coworkers cars driving drivers karen coworker driver workplace public transit coworker bus job
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