'Circling the tip amount was simply too cheeky': Group call out friend who tipped 0% at sit down restaurant, he claims he didn't get service

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 12, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

Tipping culture has definitely changed over the years. The expectations have increased, and it can seem like more and more of the burden of a service industry worker's salary is put on the customer than it is the management. This can feel unfair to folks who might be bootstrapped themselves but don't want to put out another worker. Generally, though, we accept that we need to tip because not only is it the right thing to do, but because it might be a make-or-break deal for the person on the receiving end of those tips. It might be the difference between them being able to pay their rent and not. Whether or not you think this system is fair (almost nobody does), this is the reality. 

How does this factor, though, when the service you get is not what you expected? Should this be communicated in the tip line on your check, or do you swallow your pride and tip anyway? Just how much should you short them if you're upset?

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    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • That's what one man did after his dining experience proved less than ideal. But his friends didn't appreciate his behavior. Read on for the story and decide if you would have done the same thing in his situation.

  • 02

    AITA for not tipping because my waiter didn't "wait" on me?

    I went to a sit-down restaurant last night, and my waiter (let's call him Brad) took my order... and then disappeared. Didn't check in, didn't refill my drink, didn't even bring my food-some random food runner did.
    via u/Status_Jackfruit6397
  • 03
    Then, when the check came, Brad magically reappeared, circled the "suggested tip," and gave me a big smile like we'd been through something together. My guy, what am I tipping for? You didn't wait on me-you just took my order and vanished like a part-time magician.
    via u/Status_Jackfruit6397
  • 04
    So, I left no tip. Now my friends are calling me an AH because "that's just how restaurants work." AITA?
    via u/Status_Jackfruit6397
  • 05

    Commenters agreed that he was right to expect more attention from his server.

    Ok_Stable7501 · 18h ago It's fun to play dumb here. Hi Brad! Were you my waiter? I don't think I've seen you before. My waiter checked on me and refilled my drink. Be sure to tell me where to find him so I can leave the tip with him.
    via u/Ok_Stable7501
  • 06
    David Norek 18h ago • I'm a waiter with over 10 years experience. Tell your friends that I said you are 100% NTA. The server didn't take good care of you so he deserved nothing!
    via u/DavidNorek
  • 07
    Suspicious_Juice... • 19h ago NTA No service, no tip. Pretty straight forward. Dude should have at least asked you if everything was ok, or a refill. Bare minimum.
    via u/Suspicious_Juice717
  • 08
    Huge-Singer-7049 . 17h ago Circling the tip amount was simply too cheeky.
    via u/Huge-Singer-7049
  • 09
    Bibliophile_w_coff... . 19h ago NTA. And I'd write why. Especially the didn't check on me or refill my drink part. That is not how restaurants work.
    via u/Bibliophile_w_coffee
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    Cheezburger Image 10479332608
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 11
    . Short-pitched 18h ago Restaurants do work like that but we need to collectively take a stand. I go pick up food and I am given machines with 15,18,20% tip option. Tip for what? Because I came to pick my food? Restaurants need to pay a living wage to their employees and tip is for good service not just service
    via u/Short-pitched
  • 12
    mtngrl60 18h ago Have worked in food service. NTA. It would be one thing if you told us it was obvious that Brad had 15 tables and was one of only two servers on an incredibly busy Saturday night.
    via u/mtngrl60
  • 13
    Because in a case, like that, you probably are going to have a hostess, who tries to refill your drinks. Or a food runner who does that. You will probably have a manager trying to table touch as many tables as they possibly can.
    via u/mtngrl60
  • 14
    The bartender themselves may run your drinks over. The bus boy may actually just be taking things from a nearby table and glacier Way to see if there's something they can get you.
    via u/mtngrl60
  • 15
    Basically, the rest of the restaurant staff is going to do that they can to help those two massively overworked servers. But this? No. That is not how service should be handled. You should've seen Brad within the first few bites of getting your food so that if anything was wrong, they could get an immediately corrected.
    via u/mtngrl60
  • 16
    You should've seen Brad a little further on to see if you were doing OK still or thought about the dessert or needed refills on your drinks. So no, NTA.
    via u/mtngrl60
  • 17
    N... . . 19h ago Edited 14h ago NTA I used to be a surver these people have entirely too much tip entitlement you get tipped for the services. you render, and if you don't render me services, you get nothing
    via u/No-Nature2803
  • 18
    Cichlidsaremyjam • 18h ago NTA. But in cases like that if there is a bus boy/girl around, I make sure to tip them something because you know they aren't able to avoid doing their job.
    via u/Cichlidsaremyjam
  • 19
    GossamerSilkk 11h ago NTA Nah, ur friends are wrong. He did the bare minimum. Tipping is for service, not for existing. If someone else brought ur food, and he did nothing else, he doesn't deserve it. He wants a tip, he needs to earn it.
    via u/GossamerSilkk
  • 20
    zgrizz 18h ago . NTA. You didn't even get the basic courtesy of a check-in. No excuse, no tip.
    via u/zgrizz
  • 21
    Dethsmistres · 16h ago Lived this experience at an Olive Garden half a lifetime ago. Didn't have my drink refilled once, never got the appetizer we ordered, both meals brought out cold by someone other than our waiter after sitting there for
    via u/Dethsmistres
  • 22
    about 45 minutes thinking "any minute now". Never checked on us once after getting the initial order, and she had the stones to come out of the restaurant to my car and get indignant. I suggested she ask her
    via u/Dethsmistres
  • 23
    manager where her tip went since that meal was 100% comped. I was actually shocked she noticed we were gone. I feel like you're absolutely as justified as I was.
    via u/Dethsmistres
  • 24
    ComfortableAbjec... NTA 18h ago Worked food service for years and you are in the right. You tip the service, and he didn't give you any. I would say, tho, that he most likely tips out the food runner, so that may hurt them
    via u/ComfortableAbject416
  • 25
    Specific_Anxiety_... • 18h ago NTA. That would bug me, and it takes a lot to make me not tip. In fact, the substantive issue notwithstanding, I would have been really pl ed off by his circling the suggestion
    via u/Specific_Anxiety_343

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