Brother demands $7k back from nonrefundable trip to Maui to pay vet bills, lashes out at brother for being unable to refund it: 'I'm not reimbursing him'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 19, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

Planning a vacation can be stressful stuff. Whenever you're making big purchases like that, things can get a little heated, especially if you're doing it with someone else. If you're relying on other people to pay you, conflict is bound to arise. Some of us aren't the most reliable when it comes to planning. Some of us have strong feelings about money, and sometimes unforeseeable disasters come along and shake everything up. And when you have a large chunk of money at stake, one wrong move can send it all tumbling down. 

It's also a fact that certain things are nonrefundable, especially after a certain amount of time. This is why you either have to be so forward-thinking that you buy insurance, or just resign to the fact that you're going to lose your deposit. The man in this story couldn't quite do either and left his family in a bad spot when his financial status changed.

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10481982208
    via Unsplash+ (Andrej Lišakov)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Life happens, and sometimes you need a chunk of money that you didn't need yesterday. Circumstances can change in an instant, and when you're on a tight budget, this can take an especially dramatic turn. Read on to see what happened in this story, and what internet pundits had to say about it.

  • 02

    AITA for not giving back 7K from a vacation reimbursement so my brother can pay vet bills from his Dog?

    Last summer, a family vacation was planned for my family (M40, wife, and 2 kids) my brothers family (M33, wife, 1 kid), and our parents. The plan was to go to Maui in May 2025. Its easily the most expensive trip any of us have been on. A fishing trip with dad was booked, a very expensive VRBO was booked and final
    via u/Moist_Ad4128
  • 03
    payment occurred last month, and at that point could not be canceled. These shared costs were put on my credit card and I was fully reimbursed by all parties for their share.
    via u/Moist_Ad4128
  • 04
    Last week, my brothers Black Lab had a severe health issue. The dog was 6 years old and unfortunately it passed. I got word of it and sent my condolences. A few days later I got a phone call from my brother. Essentially he went all out trying to save the dog and has a significant vet bill coming his way. He informed me that him and his family are backing out of the trip. He asked for his money back that he paid me.
    via u/Moist_Ad4128
  • 05
    Needless to say a disagreement occurred between us. He thinks because he canceled he should be reimbursed. My family and our parents will still be going. The trip can't be changed at this point. But i'm not reimbursing him, i'm not about to pay another 7K out of my pocket.
    via u/Moist_Ad4128
  • 06
    I told him absolutely not. He's called me an a h le and threatened small claims court. Its been a pretty toxic last few days. He refuses to consider going citing finances, emotional distress from the dog, and he doesn't want to be around me. Am I the A hle here?
    via u/Moist_Ad4128
  • 07

    Commenters had some questions about how he was handling this refund.

    . GamesDontStop • 20h ago INFO. Why is it just between you and your brother? Why aren't your parents included in this discussion? Or does he think that you personally should fund his trip cancellation?
    via u/GamesDontStop
  • 08
    Moist_Ad4128 OP · 20h ago They paid a share of the Vrbo. The fishing trip was a gift for our dad. He is coming at me because he paid me money.
    via u/Moist_Ad4128
  • 09
    November-8485 20h ago • The costs were split between all. Which means if he backs out everyone's price goes up. Talk to everyone.
    via u/November-8485
  • 10
    . mfruitfly • 20h ago NTA. These were nonrefundable costs, and that is how life works. I assume any trip I back out of, I am not getting a refund.
    via u/mfruitfly
  • 11
    Now, it would be good for the rest of you going to chat about what you COULD refund him. If changes can be made to certain things, like excursions, where you could get a refund for his part, then try. If all the family members are willing to kick in a little to
    via u/mfruitfly
  • 12
    cover part of the house rental, then that would be nice. For example, one time a group of friends rented a house, and two of the sleeping situations weren't ideal (couch in an extra room, air mattress in another), so when a couple cancelled (nonrefundable) we all got better rooms out of it, so we sent them some money back.
    via u/mfruitfly
  • 13
    If there are ways to help your brother, you should all consider doing so, but no, he can't get money for the nonrefundable stuff back.
    via u/mfruitfly
  • 14
    Cheezburger Image 10481982464
    via Unsplash+ (Andrej Lišakov)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 15
    ChaoticCapricorn • 20h ago INFO: Were all parties informed that tickets/plans were non refundable?
    via u/ChaoticCapricorn
  • 16
    Moist Ad4128 OP 20h ago • Yes, they helped pick the Vrbo. Not the first time they've used Vrbo either. They know the closer to the trip the less likely it is to be refundable.
    via u/Moist_Ad4128
  • 17
    NeedARita • 19h ago So tell him you don't have his money to give back to him. VRBO has it and they won't give it back...
    via u/NeedARita
  • 18
    Quinzal • 20h ago NTA I've been in that dog situation. There exist companies that'll do payment plans for massive vet bills... though in all honesty I regret not just letting the poor girl pass in peace.
    via u/Quinzal
  • 19
    It's an emotional time for your brother, hopefully he cools off eventually. Though I admit that threatening court for something that he consented to happen is kind of funny.
    via u/Quinzal
  • 20
    Ok-Cheetah-9125 . 20h ago NTA You aren't keeping his money. The money was non refundable. It's unfortunately that he lost his puppy but you didn't have anything to do with it.
    via u/Ok-Cheetah-9125
  • 21
    X-cited 20h ago NTA. If you could cancel his part of the trip and still chose to not reimburse him it would be different. But it sounds like nothing can be canceled or changed at this point. If you gave him his money back you'd be out the 7k and that
    via u/X-cited
  • 22
    isn't fair to you as you weren't the one to initially book his portion of the trip or choose to try every effort to save his dog. And 7k isn't such a small amount that people would be willing to cover. It s ks, but he will have to figure out his finances without expecting you to cover the costs
    via u/X-cited
  • 23
    anonanon-do-do-do . 20h ago We went through something similar. Cat had emergency surgery to the tune of $6K. You know what we did? We paid the vet with our credit card and paid off the credit card when we could. Sh like this happens when you own
    via u/anonanon-do-do-do
  • 24
    pets. He made the decision to spend money he apparently didn't have to spare on the trip and then spend it again on the dog. Now his poor decision making is YOUR problem? Got to love relatives. This is why I don't do trips with relatives any more. They just break your heart.
    via u/anonanon-do-do-do
  • 25
    Al... 20h ago Edited 19h ago Did you tell him that you don't have the money anymore and it is physically impossible to get it back? Like there's nothing you can do. What would his response to that be? What is he suggesting that you do, exactly?
    via u/Alternative-Redditer
  • 26
    Tell him "I would love to get your money back. I don't know how, so you will have to walk me through the process step by step". Maybe then he will figure out what he is asking is impossible.
    via u/Alternative-Redditer

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aita maui AITAH brother sibling rivalry sibling memes siblings money problems reddit story family feud Hawaii family sibling sister reddit thread Reddit money family vacation vacation
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