‘Should have known better than to chuck things onto our property’: President of woman's neighborhood association throws wood panels over her fence without warning, woman tosses them right back and confronts her

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Apr 4, 2025 7:00 AM EDT

What makes a community? Surely, it has got to be more than just making faux smiles at the local dog walker and greeting Jodie, the morning jogger, before you get into your car to go to work. The niceties are great, sure, but they can only go so far if they feel like a front for something else.

Really knowing your community—knowing their names, their interests, and everything in between is what makes many neighborhood associations great. However, can you truly have community if the president of your neighborhood association doesn't know which yard belongs to the person they're throwing wood panels at? Let me explain.

The resident in this next story explains that she noticed a neighbor was hauling gigantic wooden panels over her brand-new fence without warning, and she had no idea why. Rightfully annoyed and confused, she tossed the wood back over the fence into the offender's yard, but not before hearing a voice explain that she thought she was throwing the wood into "Jenny's" yard. President of the neighborhood association, and you don't know where Jenny lives—and you throw heavy objects without warning?! Sounds like a major hazard…

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  • There's absolutely nothing wrong with giving back and bartering with neighbors… that's what makes a community reliant on one another in a healthy, nurturing way. What's wrong with the situation in this story is that the president of the neighborhood association doesn't know where she's throwing heavy wood panels. Without a heads-up, a pet or person could've been harmed, and then, they'd have to be answering to bigger demons than the woman who posted the story. The only thing required to be a good neighbor is some common sense and manners… 

  • "We heard some clanging and looked out the window to see someone literally throwing two big wooden panels with hinges attached over our fence—into our yard."
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

  • "AITA for angrily tossing wood back over my fence after a neighbor put it there?"

    My husband and I [39M/39F] live in a historic section of Philadelphia in a Victorian home with a big backyard. Most of our neighbors are aging Boomers- former hippies-and the
    via InternetFan6*
  • neighborhood has a tight-knit, almost communal vibe. People help each other out, check in on each other, and generally keep tabs on what's going on. It's a
    via InternetFan6*
  • lovely place to live, but sometimes the downside is that people can be a little too involved, gossipy, and persnickety.
    via InternetFan6*
  • Behind our property, there's a lot with several garages that neighbors rent out to store things. Recently, people have been clearing out the garages
    via InternetFan6*
  • and organizing old scrap wood, doors, and other community event supplies. This morning, while my husband and I were having coffee in the kitchen, we
    via InternetFan6*
  • heard some clanging and looked out the window to see someone literally throwing two big wooden panels with hinges attached over
    via InternetFan6*
  • our fence-into our yard. We also noticed about six heavy wooden doors leaning against our fence, which we just had replaced last summer.
    via InternetFan6*
  • I was immediately annoyed, sol went outside and angrily tossed the panels back over the fence without saying a word. Just as I was finishing, I heard a woman on the other side say, "Oop-oh no- don't! Those panels are for Jenny. Is this Jenny's yard?"
    via InternetFan6*
  • I told her, "No, it's not. Jenny lives next door. And by the way, we don't want those doors leaning against our fence-we just had it replaced."
    via InternetFan6*
  • Cheezburger Image 10488679936
    via Luis Quijada for Unsplash
  • She started to push back, like she had to put them there because there was no other option, but she caught herself, sighed, and dropped it. I didn't raise my voice, but I was clearly frustrated.
    via InternetFan6*
  • Here's where I'm second- guessing myself: This neighborhood is so tight-knit that word travels fast, and now I'm feeling a bit sheepish about how I handled the situation. Once I
    via InternetFan6*
  • realized she wasn't just dumping trash in our yard and had made a mistake, I felt like an a_h_le. I could have easily peeked over the fence and said, "Excuse me,
    via InternetFan6*
  • what's this wood doing in our yard?" Instead, I just reacted and threw it back in frustration without giving her a chance to explain.
    via InternetFan6*
  • On the flip side, I still think she should have asked us—or at least had Jenny give us a heads-up- before tossing stuff over the fence or propping heavy doors against something on our property. So... AITA?
    via InternetFan6*
  • TL;DR: Neighbor mistakenly threw wooden panels into our yard and leaned heavy doors against our new fence without asking. I got frustrated and tossed the panels back without talking to her first. Now I'm wondering if I overreacted or if she should've given us a heads- up. AITA?
    via InternetFan6*
  • Update: Turns out that the woman I tussled with was actually the president of the neighborhood association. Lol. She does do a lot for the community but also should have known better than to chuck things onto our property without checking first.
    via InternetFan6*
  • Nessferatu11 NTA. She should have double- checked first to make sure she was throwing it into the right yard. Leaning stuff against someone's private fence, even on the outside, is disrespectful of someone's property also. Sure,
    via Nessferatu11
  • maybe it won't cause that much damage long-term, its just the respect to ask someone before utilizing their property. Some people want to think because it seems like no big deal, it SHOULD be fine. But people shouldn't assume.
    via Nessferatu11
  • Beth_Duttonn NTA, they need to keep their things out of your yard and off your fence.
    via Beth_Duttonn
  • alicat777777 NTA. She didn't even know where Jenny lived and flung that over the fence? That was her mistake not yours. She could have asked if it was Jenny's yard before flinging over, possibly damaging your grass and landscaping.
    via alicat777777
  • CallingThatBS NTA if the community is so tight know how does she not know which house is Jenny....
    via CallingThatBS
  • FLCLHero If something comes over my fence and I'm there to see it, I'm throwing that thing right back
    via FLCLHero

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