‘No more touching my food’: 20-year-old working girl cuts off her freeloading 27-year-old roommate, shaming her for stealing her groceries and pretending it's because ‘roommates share’

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  • "AITAH for Telling My Roommate She Can’t Keep Eating My Groceries After I Caught Her Lying?"

    I'm 20, working as a receptionist and living paycheck to paycheck in a shared apartment with my roommate, who's 27. We agreed early on to keep our food separate, I label my stuff in the fridge and pantry since I meal prep to save money.
  • Lately, I've noticed my groceries disappearing: half my chicken, a tub of yogurt, even my good coffee grounds. At first, she'd say, 'Oh, I thought it was mine,' and I let it slide, asking her to replace it. She never did.
  • Last week, I caught her red handed eating my labeled leftovers straight from the container, and she claimed she 'forgot' again and was 'starving' because she's short on cash. I checked our grocery shelf, hers is stocked with snacks and ramen, so that's a lie.
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  • I'm barely scraping by myself, and replacing what she takes is killing my budget. Yesterday, I told her she's cut off, no more touching my food, period, unless she pays me back first.
  • She flipped out, called me stingy and dramatic, and said I'm 'punishing' her for being broke when roommates should share. I'd help if she asked, but I'm tired of her sneaking and lying... Aita?
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  • Badkitty532 HI no. If you catch her again walk over to her cabinet and start taking everything. Tell her she has free range to steal then so do you! Tell her that she's not the only one who is broke and it's not your job to provide for her!
  • naoimivyyy_· NTA. She's not "broke"-she's entitled. If she were genuinely struggling, she'd ask instead of stealing and then gaslighting you about it. The fact that she has snacks but still targets your prepped meals (and good coffee?
  • That's war) proves this isn't about need-it's about convenience and disrespect. Roommates do share-when they agree to. You set clear boundaries from the start, labeled your stuff,
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  • and gave her chances to fix it. She ignored all of it because she assumed you'd roll over. Calling you "stingy" for not subsidizing her laziness is just manipulation.
  • If she keeps this up, get a mini- fridge for your room or a lockbox for pantry items. And maybe start casually mentioning how weird it is that she's so obsessed with your food. "Wow, you must really love my cooking-Venmo me $10 and I'll meal-prep for you too." Shame works wonders.
  • Impressive Cut_2339 You set clear boundaries and she ignored them. Taking your food without asking (and lying about it) isn't sharing, it's disrespect. You're just protecting yourself.
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  • TiffLuLu_96 Sounds like you need a new roommate. She's completely disrespecting you.
  • stella_est "Roommates should share" is only ever said by the roommate taking the stuff, never the one paying for it.
  • themcp NTA - figure out now what you're going to do when she ignores you and takes your food anyway.
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  • BakerB921 Put a lock on the cabinet door. Get a fridge for your room and keep your room locked. Withhold the cost of what she takes from the rent-tell her it's up to her to make it good. Then find another
  • roommate or place to live. Once people feel entitled to steal your stuff and bulls you about paying you back it only gets worse. Sorry you have to deal with this.
  • Tranqup NTA. I've seen other similar posts and advice from others to get a small fridge for your room and a lock on your bedroom door. I hope it won't require something a bit drastic like this - but your
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  • roommate has shown that she has no respect for your boundaries and will probably continue eating your food if she has easy access to it. Other option but even more difficult is finding a different roommate, which would require a move on your part along with the associated hassle and costs.
  • Zruku You're definitely NTA. This isn't about being stingy - it's about respect and boundaries that you two already agreed on from the beginning. She's not "forgetting" when the food is clearly labeled, she's just taking what isn't hers.
  • The fact that she has money for snacks but is "too broke" to replace what she takes is pretty telling. Also, roommates don't automatically "share" everything - that's not how adult living arrangements work unless explicitly agreed upon.
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  • I had a similar situation with an old roommate who would drink my expensive coffee and never replace it. Started keeping the good stuff in my room and left the cheap stuff in the kitchen. Magically, the "accidental" consumption stopped.
  • Stand your ground. Maybe get a mini fridge for your room if this continues. Being broke is tough but it doesn't give anyone the right to steal from others who are also struggling.

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