16-year-old puts presumptuous stepmother in her place after she demands to be called “mom”: 'She said that she's my mom because she's at home with me every day and is married to my dad'

You can't just immediately demand a relationship be a certain status and have it be so. You'd never presume to be able to demand that someone you've been on one date with consider you to be their boyfriend or girlfriend. Likewise, you can't presume that the teen that you've only known for two years will accept you as an adopted or "real" parent. 

What defines a "real" parent, anyway? Don't get it wrong; stepparents have their work cut out for them. You can be a terrible, inattentive bio-parent and still have the "title" and hopeful love of your children. Stepparents, by comparison, have to move heaven and earth to get a foot in the door. Coming into a kid's life is an uphill battle, and kids can kind of be jerks even if you put a lot of effort into the relationship. But you still need to put effort into the relationship if you have any hope of being an important member of their life. It takes love, consistency, and—you know—actual parenting in order to get a kid to consider you to be a parent. But there are some darn good stepparents out there who have really pulled through for their spouse's kids and really solidified their place as a "real" parent in the kid's life.

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