23 Wildly Silly Zoos Share Amazing Amazon-Like Reviews That Deliver Five-Star Laughs

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Blake Seidel • Managing Editor & Brand Manager
Apr 9, 2025 11:00 AM EDT

Hey there, animal fam. Pawsonally, we love ordering things from Amazon. It's so fast and convenient - like, yes please, same-day shipping! We wish we could order everything on Amazon (you almost can, nowadays), and what's even better than ordering from there is reading the ridiculous comments people make under the "reviews" section. You know, the Karens of the internet have to come out and complain about everything, and most times, they are 1000% howlarious.

Sure, a review for a vacuum cleaner may be silly, but what if you could give Amazon-like reviews to animals? We would give our doggos five stars, obviously, they are a supreme model (the goofiest of golden retrievers) and love to snuggle. Well, some zoos took it upon themselves to give their fluffiest, funniest animals anywhere between 1-5 stars, and their commentary is worthy of being shared all over the internet. So take your well-deserved mid-morning break and get ready to start your day with some wild giggles. Enjoy!

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  • 01
    WOODLAND PARK ZOO Woodland Park Zoo @woodlandparkzoo MISLABELED Warning. Not as labeled. This is a straight up bear. Not a sloth. Not a sloth/bear hybrid. Very good quality bear, as long as you know what you're getting into. #rateaspecies 739 4:25 PM - Mar 9, 2018 i
    via @woodlandparkzoo
  • 02
    MINNESOTA ZOO Minnesota Zoo @mnzoo We're a FANDA of the red panda. Low maintenance. Self cleaning. Extra fluff included. #rateaspecies 986 11:10 AM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @mnzoo
  • 03
    Los Angeles Zoo & Botanical Gardens @LAZOO PROS & CONS Dwarf model provides rapid clearing of foliage, weeds, and unwanted shrubbery in a compact design. Exceptionally adorable, but also will devour clothing and paper if left unattended. Occasionally hard-headed but fun to have around.#rateaspecies
    via @LAZOO

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  • 04
    Yosemite Conservancy @YoseConservancy PROS: High-quality squeak system, thrives in rocky situations, hay for days. CONS: Maybe TOO cute. Potential pun hazard. #pikaboo #rateaspecies 977 1:19 PM - Mar 9, 2018 View image on Twitter
    via @YoseConservancy
  • 05
    TYGER @TygerWDR CAT/SNAKE HYBRID Extremely musky. 5/6 ends sharp and pointy. Handles like a furry noodle. But fantastic for taking care of unwanted prairie dogs along your property.#rateaspecies 868 12:37 PM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @TygerWDR
  • 06
    Monterey Bay Aquarium @MontereyAq A TOUR DE FORCE Simply superlative. Disruptive design. Inspired mechanical engineering. Invented its own niche with seamless software/hardware integration. Absolute head-turner and conversation starter. Sorry, no headphone jack: the future is here. #rateaspecies 1,182 10:25 AM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @MontereyAq
  • 07
    3 Los Angeles Zoo & Botanical Gardens @LAZOO A+ VINTAGE ROADSTER Despite few major design updates since the Ice Age, a worthy investment for current and future aficionados. Oxygen- processing and sustained land speed unparalleled. Extremely rare, though hopefully not for long.#rateaspecies 600 9:54 AM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @LAZOO
  • 08
    PRAYING THEY KEEP MAKING THESE As seen on @Oatmeal. Full set is the ultimate seafood multi- tool: tenderizes, slices and serves in milliseconds! Comes in all colors plus some you can't see.#rateaspecies 1,304 10:48 AM - Mar 9, 2018 i
    via @MontereyAq
  • 09
    Katie O'Reilly @DrKatfish Pleasantly surprised. Thought I had ordered a Roomba, but this did an excellent job of cleaning up my ecosystem. Only downside is the projectile vomiting. Overall 5 stars, would drunkenly purchase again. #rateaspecies Glen Bartley/Audubon Field Guide 1,645 12:42 PM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @DrKatfish

  • Not the projectile vomiting, though. We'll maybe pass on this bird and go for something a little less…messy. Honestly, we would have given them less stars for that part. 

  • 10
    WOODLAND PARK 200 Woodland Park Zoo @woodlandparkzoo I WAS A DOUBTER I was skeptical but this really works! You can't just put any kind of kangaroo in a tree. You need to make sure you get the right kind. Look for labels like "Matschie's" or "Goodfellow's" to know it's the real deal. #rateaspecies
    via @woodlandparkzoo
  • 11
    @TygerWDR GREAT FOR FISHING Extremely luxurious exterior hides a strong & sturdy frame. Extreme traction on a 4x4 drivetrain for all terrain grip. Overengineered but a solid unit for outdoor excursions. Can run on peanut butter but not recommended. #rateaspecies 887 11:22 AM - Mar 9, 2018 WALLPAPERS
    via @TygerWDR
  • 12
    @shtoopy very unsatisfied with the shipping. I ordered a frog and what I got was this big melted pile. #rateaspecies 2,006 2:48 PM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @shtoopy
  • 13
    Rick Schwartz tweets animals @ZooKeeperRick 2/5 stars only. The description stated it was a mammal. Upon arrival this echidna laid an egg. A baby hatched out, that I later found out is called a puggle. I swear if I wanted more Harry Potter Fantastic Beasts I would by another book!#rateaspecies 1,091 1:36 PM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @ZooKeeperRick
  • 14
    TYGER @TygerWDR NOT WHAT I ORDERED I ordered a duck, otter, and beaver bundle apparently there was some kind of freak accident in shipping or something. Contacted shipper, they claim no error. Bad seller. NEVER BUYING AGAIN!#rateaspecies 1,672 1:51 PM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @TygerWDR
  • 15
    Rick Schwartz tweets animals @ZooKeeperRick 3/5 Audio Recorder: Mixed feelings on this review. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. It only records what it finds interesting. AND will replay LOUDLY usually at or BEFORE sunrise. Also, no battery needed. Requires fresh fruits & veggies. VERY MESSY. #rateaspecies
    via @ZooKeeperRick
  • 16
    Monterey Bay Aquarium @MontereyAq otter be 4 stars but ok first of all i'm very satisfied much improved over river edition. extremely warm insulation which adds buoyancy. if u like kelp the UrchinCrusher+ is a must on coastal trips. minus one star because it's actually a weasel lol?! #rateaspecies 1,301 10:16 AM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @MontereyAq

  • Who cares if it's actually a weasel, otters are adorable. It has been our lifelong dream to pet an otter. Or, better yet, have one as a pet. Just imagine floating in a pool while holding an otter's hand. Now that is pawfection.

  • 17
    CA AcademyOfSciences @calacademy NOT AS EXPECTED Color not as shown (not even CLOSE!!!), supposed to be predator but just sits on heated rock all day and let turtles walk all over him (if ambush predators are so different you should tell people) also missing one toe???#rateaspecies 1,940 1:42 PM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @calacademy
  • 18
    HIGH-KOALATY, IF SLUGGISH Who's got four thumbs and loves to sleep?#rateaspecies 642 10:29 AM - Mar 9, 2018
    via louisianah*ssy
  • 19
    Oregon Zoo @OregonZoo FIRST IMPRESSIONS Overall very good first impressions. Sturdy built, totally winter- ready and waterproof. Only comes in brown but that's actually a plus for me. #rateaspecies 2,461 9:30 AM - Mar 9, 2018 O
    via @OregonZoo
  • 20
    ✰✰✰YOU WONT BE DISAPPOINTED This stylish little unit is amazing. Sound quality A+. No distortion at full volume but bass is a little weak. Top rotates which is a plus. #rateaspecies 2,402 10:03 AM - Mar 9, 2018
    via louisianah*ssy
  • 21
    ☑Oregon Zoo ✪ @OregonZoo GREAT VALUE LOVE these. Must-have on all outdoor adventures. Keeps bugs off even when wet. Cordless.#rateaspecies Durham 1,727 11:09 AM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @OregonZoo
  • 22
    Tennessee Aquarium @TNAquarium Exceeds expectations! Very cute marsupial IMHO - and the only one found in the US! Curious if negative reviewers know about the benefits to the eco-system? #rateaspecies 842 12:35 PM - Mar 9, 2018
    via @TNAquarium
  • 23
    Josh's Frogs @JoshsFrogs VERY HAPPY Not to be confused with a smiling leaf. Very bouncy and keeps cricket population under control. Offers eye antennas for improved smile signal. #rateaspecies N
    via @JoshsFrogs

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hilarious amazon amazon reviews Fluffy zoo Memes lol silly animal tweets funny animal memes animal memes funny funny animals animals wild
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