16-year-old sells her 37-year-old stepmother's vintage prom dress behind her back so she could buy new headphones: 'The dress is 100% silk, one of a kind, and the brand doesn't exist anymore'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
May 16, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

One of the most important rules of etiquette is to never sell something that was given to you as a gift. I don't care how much you hate it or will never use it: you either regift it to someone, throw it away, or let it sit in your basement for the rest of time. Some people might think that throwing it away and selling it are morally comparable, but it's wrong to profit off a gift your family member or friend gave you out of their heart's kindness. Not everybody agrees with me on this, and I think there are blurred lines. If your older cousin gave you her hand-me-downs, and you sell a couple of the shirts that don't fit you on Depop, I'm not sure if that's crossing a line. There's a difference between giving something precious and getting rid of your old stuff that you'll never use again. 

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  • The situation in this story is borderline. A stepmom gave her old prom dress to her stepdaughter, and her stepdaughter sold it online. It was unclear whether this giving was a loan or a present, but most of the internet agrees that the stepdaughter was wrong to do that. 

  • 01

    AITA for grounding my stepdaughter for selling my formal dress?

    1 37F have a stepdaughter, Amy, 16F. Amy was looking for formal dresses, and I mentioned that I have my old formal dresses. She picked my old prom dress to wear, and she has kept it in her wardrobe since wearing it at prom. I don't fit in my old dresses anymore, and I kept them and
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10506454272
    via lhon karwan

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    some other clothes to hand down to my kids, however, I have two sons who aren't interested. Since my nieces, 15F and 13F are interested in my clothes, I planned to give them the rest once they were old enough to fit them.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 04
    Cheezburger Image 10506455808
    via leah hetteberg

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 05
    Amy left her earbuds in her sweatpants pocket and turned on the washing machine. When she asked for new ones, me and her dad told her to save up to buy new ones (she works part time) as she wanted an expensive brand new pair and not the wired earphones I had offered.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 06
    Cheezburger Image 10506456576
    via Arthur A

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 07
    Amy went to stay with her mom, and when she got back, she had the new earbuds she wanted, so I asked if her mom had bought them for her, and she said she had resold my dress on a second-
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 08
    hand site and bought herself the earphones. The dress is 100% silk, one of a kind, and the brand doesn't exist anymore. I was really upset to hear she had sold my dress, without even asking.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 09
    I confiscated her earbuds and told her I would give them back when she repaid me the cost of what she sold the dress for. My husband thinks I am being too harsh, as I wasn't explicit on
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 10
    whether I was lending or giving her the dress. Amy has gone to live with her mom since and thinks I am being unfair. I am not sure if I have taken it too far and if I should stand my ground.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 11
    YogurtApart1411 NTA and you are under reacting. She's lucky you haven't pressed charges already as the dress was probably worth quite a lot just on materials alone. I'd be letting your husband know charges will be filed if the money/dress is not returned within 1 week.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 12
    She stole from you. Moving to her mom's where she probably was given new ear buds anyway isn't a punishment and she learns nothing besides that you and dad are pushovers. She knew she wasn't supposed to sell the dress, that's why she kept it a secret until she was confronted.
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  • 13
    You will never be able to trust her again and you may never get your dress back. But her immediately returning the money, sincerely apologizing and getting in touch with whoever she sold it to trying to get it back, would have gone a long way with making this not as awful as it was. Your husband needs to step up as a parent and discipline is thief child now before this goes too far. The next person she steals from will not be so lenient.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 14
    Extra Firm Tofu I would demand she contact the buyer and get the dress back and pay for shipping back to you. You might even be able to go through the customer service of whatever site she used to get it back yourself if she refuses. Explain it was stolen from you. It might get her banned from selling, but actions have consequences. Edit: NTA
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  • 15
    dianebk2003 This is the answer. The merchandise was stolen, by the seller. Contact the site first. If you have evidence, such as pictures of yourself in the dress, use it. If they want to see a police report, file one. Tell the buyer you want it back. If the site cancels the sale and refunds the buyer, offer to pay the return shipping. Stress that this is a sentimental object and your heart was broken when you discovered the unauthorized sale and realized the seller stole it.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 16
    If the stepdaughter challenges, ask her to provide a proof of transfer of ownership, such as an invoice or receipt. If she says it was a gift, it comes down to your word against hers. The police report will show the extent you are willing to go to to bolster your side of the story.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 17
    You know what, file the police report, anyway. Now. it may or may not result in an arrest and the return of your dress, but it will scare the h l out of your stepdaughter and show everyone how serious this is to you. I would also never loan or gift your stepdaughter anything, ever again. Not without proof that it's a loan, and must be returned.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 18
    mashleyd Let's slow the police train down a bit. She's a teen, did something impulsive and deserves consequences but she doesn't need a rap sheet to learn a lesson. Teens do dumb stuff all the time...ruining any path back to trust isn't a good look for any family situation. You aren't being too harsh and that seems a fitting punishment.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 19
    Stunning Cloud9184 Right? Like are these reactions. She sold a dress you havent worn in 30 years. Yes you can be upset about it. But shipping her off or pressing charges makes me feel like you guys dont know anybody in real life.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 20
    amazonchic2 Oh H L no, NTA. I would be livid at Amy if she were my kid or stepdaughter. She's lucky she's not getting a worse punishment. Your consequences fit perfectly. I would be very careful about her stealing other things of mine.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 21
    Ve_Gains Info: how you communicated weather that dress will be hers or not is very very important here imo If you clearly said you lend it to her, Imma go with not the a hole. And then your husband should step up a bit more. If you had miscommunication and she believed you just give her your dress then yes you are an a_h_le
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  • 22
    Quirky-Delay9916 No she gave it to her to wear it not to sell it. Amy is the AS
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  • 23
    WonderingMe I'm 49 and would have asked for clarification. But as a teen? "Oh, you want a formal dress? Yeah, I have some that don't fit me anymore. How's this one?" And then letting her keep it in the closet... I would definitely have thought she had given it to me. No malice or greed or anything. I would have simply assumed that since it didn't fit her anymore and especially since there were no other daughters involved ... it was a gift.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 24
    sraydenk I love how everyone is blaming a 16 year old for not communicating with the OP before selling the dress. All while the OP admits to not clearly communicating if it was a loan or a gift. I thinks it's crazy to hold a teenager to a higher standard of communication than a 37 year old.
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864
  • 25
    Front-Palpitation362 NTA you lent her a sentimental irreplacable dress and she sells it behind your back???? Just entitlement and straight up disrespect. Doesn't matter if you didn't say the words "this is a loan", like isn't it basic decency to not sell something that doesn't belong to you and you didn't pay for??? Grounding her is teaching her that actions have consequences. Stand your ground!!!!
    via u/Capable-Schedule-864

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family drama stepmother prom dress stepmom dad family dress mom bad parenting parenting headphones money Parenting Fail Parenting FAILS selling
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