'He hasn't been holding up his end of taking care of them': Neglectful messy roommate gets kicked out and tries to take half of bonded cat pair, even though he doesn't care for them

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Sarah Brown • Writer and Editor
Jun 14, 2025 2:00 PM EDT

This whole situation is a total catastrophe. The roommate's behavior has been nothing short of clawful, from leaving dirty dishes and food out for days to completely neglecting litter box duties. Despite previously pawmising to care for "his" cat, he's proven time and again that he's unwilling or unable to meet even the bare minimum of responsible pet care.

Meanwhile, the two cats who were adopted together have formed a rare and beautiful furiendship. They nap together, groom each other, and play like lifelong littermates. One of them struggles with anxiety, but is noticeably more confident and calm when his best buddy is by his side. Separating them would be more than sad, it would be purrticularly damaging to their wellbeing.

The concern here isn't just about cleanliness (though that's bad enough); it's about safety and emotional health. With one human clearly committed to their care and the other showing repeated neglect, it's pretty pawvious who should keep both cats. These bonded babies deserve to stay together in a loving, clean, and purroperly cared-for home.

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  • 01
    I am kicking my roommate out as he has consistently failed to keep his room clean, and not just like clothes on the floor but leaving food covered plates and bowls in his room and his office for days if not weeks. He and I adopted 2 cats a little over a year ago and the 2 have bonded with each other
    via u/SlilsonWade
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    very closely, they groom each other several times a day, they nap together constantly, and they play together every single day. My roommate is attempting to put his foot down to keep one of the cats. Though several months ago he recommitted to taking full care of that cat, he has been unable to or unwilling to empty his litter box for
    via u/SlilsonWade
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    weeks if not months, and again he leaves food out for days in full access of the cats, including small bones they could choke on and sauces that are already not good for cats, especially after sitting in a hot room for days.
    via u/SlilsonWade
  • 06
    I really do not want to separate these 2 cats, as the cat I have most bonded with has severe anxiety and does best when his best friend is with him. He is so much more confident and outgoing with our other cat by his side and I am afraid that separating them will depress him
    via u/SlilsonWade
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  • 08
    and cause his anxiety to skyrocket once again. It's extremely rare to find cats that have bonded as closely as these two have, especially among non siblings. I explained that he hasn't been holding up his end of taking care of them, and that if his cat was to for example get a UTI like mine did recently, he wouldn't know about it
    via u/SlilsonWade
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    as he does not clean the litter box and his cat can and will di . I'm just at a loss as to what else to do.
    via u/SlilsonWade
  • 11
    ELLEY STEIN
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  • 12
    retro-girl If you've been covering the bills for the cats, just remind him of this and tell him that's how animal ownership works, they are yours. If you haven't been covering all the bills, offer to reimburse him for the bills.
    via u/retro-girl

  • If you’ve been footing the bill this whole time, that’s already a big part of ownership right there. Care, commitment, and actual responsibility speak louder than empty promises.

  • 13
    DoubleD_RN It's really awful to separate a bonded pair. Tell him to do some research on it.
    via u/DoubleD_RN
  • 14
    Consistent-Stand18... You can't let that cat suffer from neglect
    via u/Consistent-Stand1809
  • 15
    Bubbly_Power_6210 no-keep those kitties together! 100.00 should do it.
    via u/Bubbly_Power_6210
  • 16
    Data-Appearance9... Offer him $200 to cover finding a new pet and some supplies. I bet he'll pocket the cash and split.
    via u/Data-Appearance9699

  • He’ll probably take the money. Small price to pay to keep those sweet kitties safe and together. Their bond is too special to risk over someone else's neglect.

  • 17
    Nercow They belong together. Roommate seems incapable. of taking care of 1 cat let alone 2. Fight it legally if you have to. But I'd just offer them a little money and see if they take it instead.
    via u/Nercow
  • 18
    Sea-Machine-1928 Document all his neglectful behavior in case you have to take him to court. Consider calling the police. and making an incident report for endangering the cats. Because he left spoiled food out and chicken bones. Start preparing your case against him.
    via u/Sea-Machine-1928
  • 19
    I hope you're able to keep them together.
    via u/Sea-Machine-1928
  • 20
    Freeda-Peeple He sounds very irresponsible. Even if he wasn't, I would not advise separating the cats, for all the reasons you say. Keep an eye on them, too. He sounds like the kind of person who would steal it because it was "his."
    via u/Freeda-Peeple
  • 21
    CreepySheepherder... Please don't give one of the cats to him.
    via u/CreepySheepherder544
  • 22
    SunTryingMoon You should not separate a bonded pair. Maybe send him some research on bonded pairs, and say they will not be separated, but that you can either pay him money to keep the cat (make a contract) and tell him to use the money to get a cat that isn't bonded to another (even though this individual should not own a cat)
    via u/SunTryingMoon

  • You’ve gotta keep bonded pairs together. Separating them can seriously hurt their mental health. They’re besties for life, not a matching set to split! 

  • 23
    KayOokay Who signed the adoption papers? Whose name is on the account at the vet or registered under their microchips? You should definitely keep both if he isn't taking care of them, but if your name is solo on these that will give you proof of ownership in case this has to go through court.
    via u/KayOokay
  • 24
    LivingStCelestine Is there a place you can put the cats until he's gone to make sure he doesn't steal one? Maybe you can board them somewhere or have another friend or family. I'd be worried he would do it on the sly and you'll never see the cat again.
    via u/LivingStCelestine

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fight feline argument roommates Cats adopted advice moving
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