Woman calls off wedding after fiancé insists on hiring his ex-girlfriend as the caterer, stands her ground despite backlash from family: 'My own siblings are calling me petty'

Author image for Isabella Penn
Isabella Penn
Jul 12, 2025 7:00 PM EDT

Planning a wedding is supposed to be a joyous time, filled with excitement and anticipation, even if it comes with its fair share of stress. This bride had everything going smoothly until her fiancé insisted on choosing the caterer himself. At first, she didn't think much of it. But then, his cousin let her in on a secret... the caterer he picked was not just any vendor, but his ex-girlfriend. And not just any ex, either. He picked the woman he'd been with longer than he'd been with the bride.

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  • Some might say she was being petty or insecure for feeling upset. But it wasn’t jealousy that made her call off the wedding. It was his secrecy and, more importantly, his refusal to respect her feelings or even have a conversation about her boundaries. 

    That lack of communication and disregard for her comfort was the real dealbreaker. In the end, standing up for herself was an act of courage, not pettiness, even if others saw it differently.

  • "Eat Drink &BE Married
    via Erika Fletcher For Unsplash+

  • "AITA for calling off my wedding because my fiancé wanted his ex to cater the event?"

    | 27F recently called off my wedding to my fiancé 30M and now everyone is acting like I'm the villain. We have been together for 2 years and got engaged 3 months ago.
    via HoneyMoondro
  • Wedding planning has been stressful but mostly smooth until it came time to finalize the catering. My fiancé insisted on hiring a specific caterer he has worked with in the past (he's in event
    via HoneyMoondro
  • planning), and I was fine with that until I found out who she was. Turns out that the caterer is his ex-girlfriend of four years. They dated seriously, lived together,
    via HoneyMoondro
  • and only broke up before he met me. He didn't tell me about that I found out from his cousin Barkley. I brought it up calmly, and he admitted it was her, but said they are on good terms and that she is the
    via HoneyMoondro
  • Cheezburger Image 10527313152
    via Ahmed For Unsplash+
  • best in the business. He genuinely didn't see a problem. I told him I wasn't comfortable with his ex being such a central part of our wedding. He said I
    via HoneyMoondro
  • was being insecure and immature, and that it's just business. I suggested. that there are many good caterers we should find another highly rated caterer. He refused and
    via HoneyMoondro
  • said I was making drama out of nothing. That was a huge red flag to me. Long story short, we argued about it for days. His refusal to even consider my feelings over
    via HoneyMoondro
  • this made me question everything. I couldn't see myself marrying someone who dismissed my boundaries like that, so I called it off.
    via HoneyMoondro
  • Now, his family and even my own siblings are calling me "petty" and saying I threw away a great relationship over something small. I feel heartbroken and confused.
    via HoneyMoondro

  • If you have doubts before your wedding, it’s important to seriously take a step back and reconsider. Marriage is expensive, but divorce is messy. 

    If you can save you from future heartbreak and hassle, do it ASAP. 

  • KelsarLabs Oh honey, massive red flag, especially since he tried to slip it by you without saying anything.
    via KelsarLabs
  • Girlnscrubs Correction he threw away a relationship over something so small and petty. I bet if the situation was reversed he wouldn't have appreciated it.
    via Girlnscrubs
  • ypranch As hard and painful as that was, you made the right decision. So many red flags. His
    via ypranch
  • wanting to use her in the first place. His insistence despite your discomfort. His refusal to entertain any alternatives. Sounds like he's not over her.
    via ypranch
  • boobookittie80 NTA. If he stomped all over your boundaries over this, what's going to happen when you don't agree on... where to buy a house....how
    via boobookittie80
  • many kids you'll have....if you're going to be a working mom or stay at home....if he decides to divorce you and screw you over? You're avoiding a world of stress and unhappiness by ending it now.
    via boobookittie80
  • Go-Mellistic It wasn't a great relationship if he won't consider your feelings and insists on inserting his ex into your wedding. You did good here, you saved yourself much future drama and heartbreak. NTA
    via Go-Mellistic
  • rangerstranger9472 NTA - 1. He didn't tell you this girl was his ex. He keeping secrets.
    via rangerstranger9472
  • 2. He made you feel like crazy when you found out - from his cousin. He not being honest. 3. He didn't care about your feelings and dismissed them. He being disrespectful.
    via rangerstranger9472
  • 4. He didn't even want to discuss another option. He not willing to listen to you. Nah, you better of alone than with him. This just
    via rangerstranger9472
  • shows you how your life would be for the rest of your life with this man. Stand tall and stand with yourself.
    via rangerstranger9472

Tags

drama ex girlfriend cancelled caterer siblings relationships petty wedding family breakup fiancé vendor entitled people
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