'I pay for everything': Man threatens to charge his long-time girlfriend $900 in rent for her two kids after he gets yelled at for sharing his parenting opinions

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Jul 20, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

Kids make everything more expensive. Suddenly, instead of paying for two meals at the restaurant, you're covering a bill of 5+ menu items, soft drinks, and a couple of kids' menu rejects. Although the joys of parenting often outweigh the costs, sometimes, the lines can be blurred on who is allowed to be a parent when the kids aren't technically yours. Stepparents and chosen father figures have a tough role to fill, and often, your financial situation is tied to your level of parenting involvement.

This mother of two children was happy to let her boyfriend of 3 years bankroll her child's existence—paying for rent for a big house, groceries, and everything else the kids required—but when he tried to officially step up as the father figure, that crossed a line for her.

You'd think that once you start paying for your girlfriend's kids, you're allowed to be the father figure that steps up, but perhaps this woman only wanted him for his checkbook, because she certainly didn't want any of his opinions on parenting. 

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  • AITAH for telling my GF she needs to pay rent for her kids? AITAH for telling my GF she needs to pay rent for her kids? So back story my (M34) and gf (32F) have been dating for 2.5 years and living
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • together for about 13 months. We moved to a different state for her to go to college. So we both had to get new jobs, I found one off the bat. She took a couple months to find something. So I started paying
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • for everything. Eventually she came around and started paying for groceries. But she doesn't have money for anything else. She does have a couple of kids. So she has
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • them full time and the father doesn't pay any child support. I mean I make pretty good money but I don't feel I should be paying for everything. Plus she decided not to go to college any more.
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • Anyway, we were out to dinner the other night and I forget exactly how the topic came up but it had to do with her kids. I guess I was giving advice when that wasn't my intention. I thought we were just
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • talking about issues. Anyway, she proceeded to tell me how I'm not a parent and I have no room to talk and that I need to leave the parenting to her. So I told her that if that's the case she should pay
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • rent for her kids then. (We have a three bed room unit and while we are both on the lease I'm paying for it). I told her it would be about $900 a month on account of that's
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • about $475 per room. Obviously she was angry. Eventually we got past that, but I started thinking maybe I was out of line. So was I TAH?
    via ThrowRAmostly5
  • Ornery_O. If she doesn't consider you a parent or male figure in her kids life you aren't responsible to pay for them. She needs to get a job and pay for half the expenses, including rent and food. Otherwise kick her to the curb and find someone who isn't an ahle.
    via Ornery_O
  • Proper_Fun_977 ΝΤΑ IF you're taking on parental responsibilities, you have a say in the parenting. Or, she can pay for her kids.
    via Proper_Fun_977
  • SRB2118. NTA. I'm a mom with a de d beat baby daddy. My husband and I pool all money but if I was her I wouldnt allow you to pay for everything. She's using you!!!
    via SRB2118
  • Mission_Leather_2913 Hold up.... She had you MOVE states so she could go to college...then she drops out n pays nothin but food costs??? Nahhhh bruh....
    via Mission_Leather_2913
  • HolyDarknes117 Bro WHY are still in this relationship?!?! She is using you to pay for everything while she doesn't even have job to provide for her own kids!
    via HolyDarknes117
  • johnnycarrotheid ⚫ You are getting played You move for HER college, and she isn't going, that's a massive flag that it could be for other reasons. Isn't earning enough to pay anything other than basic groceries, how much does she work?
    via johnnycarrotheid
  • For all you know, she could have skipped states to keep the dad, or dad's, away from their kids, and that's a possible warning for your own future. Do not get her pregnant. She could be claiming child support, and because
    via johnnycarrotheid
  • dad's are in another state and can't see them, she can claim maximum child support. Padding her bank account, while you pay for everything
    via johnnycarrotheid
  • You are basically bankrolling her in her move to another state. It's not for college, and you need to find out what's going on, and why.
    via johnnycarrotheid

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boyfriend family drama entitled parents kids tenant stepfather moms parenting rent pay bills stepdad mom Parenting Fail parents children entitled people
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