'I’m not a bank': Man-child quits his job on a whim, expecting his 24-year-old girlfriend to financially support him until he "figures it out," she refuses so he gets Mommy involved in the guilt-trip

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Aug 7, 2025 3:00 PM EDT

Moving in with someone you're dating is a huge step in a relationship, and in many cases, it makes or breaks your love connection. This girlfriend, a 24-year-old working girl, had agreed to move in with her BF after a year, claiming they'd split the bills 50/50 and be cotenants in an effort to save money and grow their relationship. However, she realized that he was not the financially responsible type. 

He quit his job without warning and then expected her to cover all of their finances, so since this woman never agreed to be a boy-man's Suga Mama, she refused. However, when the man-child got denied, he brought in the A-lister of guilt-trips: His mother. 

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  • Cheezburger Image 10539008768
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • AITA for refusing to pay my boyfriend's portion of rent after he quit his job without telling me?
    via glowsoftroses
  • I'm 24F and I've been living with my boyfriend (27M) for a little over a year. We split rent 50/50 and keep our finances separate. Everything was going fine until a few weeks ago.
    via glowsoftroses
  • I started noticing he was home way more than usual. I asked about it and he just said he was taking some time off. Cool, whatever. Then a friend of his casually mentioned that he had actually quit his job. That was the first I heard of it.
    via glowsoftroses
  • So I asked him straight up, and yeah, turns out he just quit. No notice, no conversation with me. His reasoning was that he felt burned out and needed to reset.
    via glowsoftroses
  • I'm not unsympathetic to that at all, but I feel like quitting your job without a plan or at least talking to the person you live with is a massive red flag.
    via glowsoftroses
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    via Katarzyna

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Now here's the kicker: he fully expected me to just cover rent and bills for the next couple of months while he "figures things out." I told him I couldn't do that. I work full-time, pay my own bills, and I'm not in a position to carry both of us, especially not without a heads-up.
    via glowsoftroses
  • He's now saying I'm unsupportive and selfish. Even his mom got involved and called me out, saying I should be standing by him. She literally blocked me after I told her I'm not a bank.
    via glowsoftroses
  • I feel bad, but I'm also just... really frustrated. If he had talked to me first, maybe we could've come up with something. But the fact that he made this decision solo and just expected me to deal with it doesn't sit right.
    via glowsoftroses

  • Honestly, this is a break-upable offense in my opinion. Not consulting your partner, or even having a conversation with them, before making a decision that affects both of you feels incredibly selfish to me. Frankly, you don't want to be hitching your horse to any wagon missing a wheel, so perhaps it's time for this grown working woman to take a step back from the relationship and reassess if she wants to be with a selfish man-child forever. My guess is, she doesn't.

  • ShoddyMove6054. NTA. He made an adult decision, he can face adult consequences. Quitting your job without telling your partner is wild. That's not burnout, that's irresponsibility.
    via ShoddyMove6054
  • glowsoftroses OP Right? Like if he's so "burned out," maybe his mom can cover his rent while he vibes at home. I'm not his girlfriend and his landlord.
    via glowsoftroses
  • Adept Policy_2996. I would break up over this. He is not a good long term partner. He is not dependable. He is the opposite of dependable. He is willing to cost you a lot of money/sanity at random times and EXPECTS you to figure out how to support him. Don't fall for it. He will always be like this. At least you found out earlyish in the relationship and aren't married to him.
    via Adept Policy_2996
  • rosegoldblonde ⚫ NTA. So he's expecting to just leech off you indefinitely while he sits at home on his ass? Fuck that. I'd consider leaving someone who is this manipulative and selfish. Tell his mom she can support him.
    via rosegoldblonde
  • rosegoldblonde ⚫ He's showing you who is really is girl. Believe him. I know you're probably stuck in a lease but I do hope you consider his behaviour and prioritize yourself & your future because this is fucked up and you don't deserve this!!
    via rosegoldblonde
  • Efficient-Tailor7223. Tell him you arent covering his portion and let your landlord know he is responsible for his own rent. See if landlord will draw up your own lease or allow you to take your name off the lease. Make a plan to find other accommodations and let his ship sink without you on board
    via Efficient-Tailor7223

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boyfriend family drama tech support job finance i quit moms relationships girlfriend financial pay bills burden mom
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