'Last opportunity to feel beautiful before I get old:' Entitled mother-of-the-bride declares that she will be wearing a white gown to daughter's wedding, refuses to attend the wedding after daughter refuses

There are two rules of life, just two: 1.) Be a good person, 2.) Never wear white to wedding. 

Plain, simple, and pretty self-explanatory, or so we thought? We understand, perhaps your high school arch-nemesis showing up to the wedding unannounced, glowing in a white lace mini dress, with an 'oops, I thought it was on the creamier side,' but you DO NOT expect that from your own mother! Imagine receiving a text from your mom with an attachment of the dress she bought for your wedding, but instead of a little floral something blue moment, it's a floor-length, white gown… and no, this one can definitely not be classified as 'on the creamier side', it's a wedding dress.

Wait, it gets worse. After the soon-to-be bride confronts her mother's inappropriate choices, she absolutely freaks out, claiming that her daughter is being excessively controlling and ungrateful. The tears start to stain cheeks, and the invites are torn apart…so will her mother be there to carry her veil, or will the mother be holding her own?

Author image for Emma Saven Emma Saven
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  • If this unself-aware mother wants to wear white oh so desperately, she should consider renewing her vows. At least then she can be the center of attention without having to take it away from someone else. We fear that the looks and whispers she’ll receive from showing up covered in white might earn her the attention she wasn’t quite hoping for.


     

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    Angry bride screaming on the phone
    via stocklite

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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  • 02

    AITA for refusing to let my mom wear white to my wedding, even though she claims it’s her “last chance” to feel beautiful?

    I just turned 23 and I'm getting married in October. My mom and I have always had what I would refer to as rocky relationship,
    via Lonely-Big7902
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    especially since I got engaged. She's been oddly competitive, commenting on my body, comparing our rings, like we are
    via Lonely-Big7902
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    comparing our rings, like we are in a competition, saying things like "this day is as much about me as it is about you." I honestly thought she was joking
    via Lonely-Big7902
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  • 05
    until she showed me the dress she bought, a white, floor length gown that looks exactly like a bridal dress. And II told her, flat
    via Lonely-Big7902
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    out, she cannot wear that because in my opinion it doesn't match the occasion. She got quiet, then burst into tears, saying
    via Lonely-Big7902
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    it's her "and this was an opportunity to feel beautiful before getting old" and that I'm selfish for not letting her have this one thing.
    via Lonely-Big7902
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  • 08
    I felt really bad about this so I also offered to go shopping with her to find something elegant and more appropriate.
    via Lonely-Big7902
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    And all of a sudden her countenance changed and then She told me I was controlling and ungrateful. What gave me peace
    via Lonely-Big7902
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    was that My fiancé backed me up, as did my maid of honor. Now my mom is threatening not to come to the wedding, and my aunt says
    via Lonely-Big7902
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  • 11
    I should just "let her have this" to avoid drama. I don't think I'm wrong for drawing a line here, but now part of me wonders if AITA?
    via Lonely-Big7902
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    Woman in a white dress and sunhat
    via gettysignature

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    Question Maker207 NTA. Don't let her come or she'll throw a tantrum and ruin your wedding to make it all about her.
    via x
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  • 14
    Lonely-Big7902 OP i'm not having her negative energy around my happiest day, i'll make sure
    via x
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    ShadowcatMD Nta Your mom needs therapy. Your aunt is an enabler.
    via x
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    ShipComprehensive543 NTA And you know what? If she wears white, people will be talking mad sh about her. She may get the attention but not for the reason she thinks.
    via x
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  • 17
    WabbitCZEN Not wanting other people to wear white at your wedding and not wanting to give up a seat you paid for on an airplane are two topics I think we can all agree don't need to be asked if they're the ah le.
    via x
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    Not-That_Girl Sadly, she isn't going to look beautiful, shes going to look silly, desperate and very inappropriate. Tell her this. NTA you are trying to save her from herself.
    via x
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    No-Assignment5538 NTA. Tell you aunt that if she wants your Mom to have a "moment" to "feel beautiful" that she should pony up the money to throw your Mom a massive celebration in a fancy venue with all the trappings, food, decorations, etc but that your wedding is NOT going to be that event.
    via x
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    TrickSea_239 NTA. She can have her own wedding, or renew her vows if she's already married. She can wear the pretty white dress that she feels beautiful in in her own time.
    via x
  • 21
    TenMoon Time to play the Reverse Uno card on your aunt by reminding her that the best and easiest way to avoid drama is to ban your mother from the wedding altogether.
    via x
  • 22
    Jerseygirl2468 NTA "and this was an opportunity to feel beautiful before getting old" I wish you had looked at her critically said "too late for that!"
    via x
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  • 23
    sbinjax NTA, draw that line. "this day is as much about me as it is about you" is just flat out wrong. No, it's not. I have three daughters, two are married, and I managed to feel beautiful at their weddings without wearing white.
    via x
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    thechaoticstorm NTA She knows exactly what she is doing and it is a power play. Be grateful that she told you before the wedding that she intended to do this, instead of just showing up that way.
    via x

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refuse bridemaids bride dress-shopping Awkward mother of the bride uninvited attention askreddit white looking-beautiful husband wedding dress entitled wearing white memebase family daughter
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