29-year-old tech-savvy son threatens to remove mother from family cell plan after she continually responds to scam texts, triggering fraud locks on his accounts: ‘[She] asked me to stop being dramatic’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Nov 2, 2025 2:00 PM EST

There's no shame in not understanding how certain technologies work. There is shame, however, in refusing to try to understand them.

The kind, older mother in the story below is a testament to many members of older generations' refusals to adapt to the world around them. In the same way that younger generations couldn't fathom writing essays without help from artificial intelligence, older generations want to stick to analog methods of the world. There are pros and cons to both tech and analog, but that's not the point of this next story.

Have you ever received a scam text? You know, the ones where they ask you to click a link because one of your bank accounts was "compromised" and you need to sign in to it to fix the problem? Or, how about those emails where somebody has clearly requested a code to log in to one of your social media accounts in an attempt to hijack it? For some strange reason, the mom in this next story keeps clicking "yes" to messages that serve to compromise her son's multiple accounts, ranging from bank to social. Her son is the account holder, so he is pleading with his mom to take a course, at the very least, so she knows not to respond to unknown messages. Her response? She tells him to stop being so dramatic. Scroll below.

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  • 01
    elderly woman smiling while looking at her cellphone
    via Vitaly Gariev (Unsplash)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    "WIBTA if I suspend my mom’s line from our family phone plan after her approvals keep triggering fraud locks on my accounts"

    I am 29, I run the family cell plan because I am the techy one and I get an employer discount that knocks 18 percent off.
    via Erwanam
  • 03
    It is me, my mom, my younger brother, and my grandma's little flip line. The total after taxes is 164 per month, cover it on autopay and they pay me back with Zelle.
    via Erwanam
  • 04
    Mom is 54 and very smart in general, but she taps yes on every random text that pops up because the message says it is urgent.
    via Erwanam
  • 05
    This month was the third time her approvals messed up my stuff. First time, back in April, some "delivery" text asked her to verify a package.
    via Erwanam
  • 06
    She hit the link, entered her number, then a code, and my Instagram got hit with a login from a different state.
    via Erwanam
  • 07
    Mild chaos, I reset things, taught her about fake links. Second time in July, a "bank alert" text asked to confirm a $980 purchase.
    via Erwanam
  • 08
    She clicked, typed the code that came to her phone, and my checking locked for 24 hours while I was trying to pay a plumber.
    via Erwanam
  • 09
    I was embarrased and kind of mad, but I kept it cool, turned on more 2FA, removed SMS from everything I could, moved to an authenticator app.
    via Erwanam
  • 10
    Thought we were ok. Last Thursday it got worse. At 7 12 am I was making coffee and my watch buzzed, new sign in attempt for my email.
    via Erwanam
  • 11
    hit no. Thirty seconds later, same thing, but the code went to my mom's phone, not to me.
    via Erwanam
  • 12
    She was at work already, she saw a text saying "Your email is being accessed, reply YES to secure your mailbox." She replied yes.
    via Erwanam
  • 13
    Then more codes. By 7 23 my email and two cloud drives started spitting alerts. At 7 31 my Git hosting locked my account for unusual activity because someone tried a password reset.
    via Erwanam
  • 14
    I work remote, I had a client standup at 9, my stomach felt like ice. I called Mom, asked her what she tapped.
    via Erwanam
  • 15
    She said "I thought I was helping you, the text said to confirm you blocked the hacker." I asked her to bring her phone by my place or at least read the sender.
    via Erwanam
  • 16
    She sent me screenshots, all short codes with weird grammar. My brother thinks I am overreacting, he says everyone gets phished sometimes.
    via Erwanam
  • 17
    But I am the one who pays the plan and my identity is the one tied to the master account.
    via Erwanam
  • 18
    megaphone with security alert chat bubble and smartphone to indicate online fraud
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)
  • 19
    I spent four hours on support that day, froze my credit, rotated recovery emails, killed every SMS fallback I could find.
    via Erwanam
  • 20
    I missed half my standup and then my boss joked I should staple my phone to my hand.
    via Erwanam
  • 21
    Not funny. I felt like crying in the shower after, head pounding, coffee went cold on the counter and tasted like ash when I finally took a sip at noon.
    via Erwanam
  • 22
    I talked to Mom that night. She said she is "just not good with phones" and asked me to stop being dramatic.
    via Erwanam
  • 23
    I offered three options. One, she takes my little security bootcamp, 45 minutes on a Saturday, I show her what to tap and what not, we practice with fake messages, and I set her phone so unknown senders get filtered.
    via Erwanam
  • 24
    Two, I move her line to prepaid in her name, I will pay the early transfer fee, about 60, and she can manage it how she wants.
    via Erwanam
  • 25
    Three, if she wants to stay on my plan, I suspend SMS based recovery entirely and remove her number from any shared logins, and if I see another yes to a random code I will suspend her line for a week as a time out.
    via Erwanam
  • 26
    She got angry, said that is controlling and that she needs her phone because she volunteers at church and Grandma calls her.
    via Erwanam
  • 27
    I get that, I love them both. But I am tired of cleaning up fires. My credit card fraud team called today about a new attempt and I swallowed hard in the grocery line at 6 18 pm because my cart was already at 84 and I did not want to hold up the line if the card got declined.
    via Erwanam
  • 28
    Important detail, I am not trying to punish my mom, I am trying to protect my accounts and my job.
    via Erwanam
  • 29
    The plan is still cheaper for everyone with my discount, but the risks keep stacking. If I suspend her line for a week after another approval, that stops the codes from landing and buys me time to lock things down.
    via Erwanam
  • 30
    It feels harsh though. Would I be the j if I enforce this boundary and actually suspend her line next time, or is this a reasonable consequence for a pattern that is now hurting me in very real and very expensive ways.
    via Erwanam
  • 31
    Key_Step7550 I'd switch her out and tell her she's an adult she can manage her own mess.
    via Key_Step7550
  • 32
    kafquaff I'm only 3 years younger than your mom, and MY mom is better with spammers. If she refuses to learn safety she shouldn't have access to the tech. You have offered her PLENTY of options, and her refusal to accept them or learn anything is concerning.
    via kafquaff
  • 33
    2cents0 ks NTA. She's going to get your stuff hacked, emptied, and maybe a virus for good measure. My dad says he's "not good with tech" too. My poor uncle's wife and my BIL both have spent many hours removing viruses from his devices and getting his computer back online.
    via 2cents0***ks
  • 34
    Put her on a different account and let her own stuff get hacked. Maybe that's the only way she'll learn, because right now, despite her having had multiple warnings, YOU are facing all the consequences.
    via 2cents0***ks

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