27-year-old pastry chef feuds with entitled server "Ashley" who keeps making him customize orders: 'You were making me remake dishes all night!'

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Ben Weiss • Writer and Editor
Nov 24, 2025 4:00 PM EST

This server was picking fights with the wrong pastry chef.

"Ashley" clearly took issue with this pastry chef's work. She was a new server at a high-end restaurant in Portland. The chef had been working there for years and built the dessert menu from scratch, so to speak. The establishment was known for its pastries, and before Ashley came along, customers rarely requested alterations to the menu.

But all of a sudden, ever since Ashley started working at the restaurant, the chef would get constant requests every two seconds because clearly, Ashley either couldn't properly explain the dishes, or she simply wanted to start drama. Regardless, it was disrespectful and annoying.

This conflict really came to a head, however, on a busy Saturday night. The restaurant was packed, orders were backed up, and no one had time for Ashley's nonsense. Nevertheless, she persisted, and that caused the pastry chef to lose it. Keep scrolling below to find out what happened when the chef decided to speak to Ashley's customers directly.

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  • Creme brule sitting in a white ceramic bowl.
    via Max Griss

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Ashley was upset that the pastry chef made her look bad that night, but it was the only way he could stop the madness of constant menu alterations. Eventually, the manager got involved, and Ashley didn't have any legs to stand on by the end of the night. I guess the moral of the story here is that if you have found yourself in Ashley's position, never mess with the expert who made the recipes!

  • "Server thought crème brûlée shouldn't be 'burny' so I gave her a menu education."

    I'm 27m, pastry chef at a high- end restaurant in Portland. I do the dessert menu, been here four years, went to culinary school in Paris, the whole deal.
    via OkPay6990
  • So we hired this server named Ashley maybe three months back. She's early twenties, super bubbly with customers which is great. But she started doing this thing where she'd come back to the kitchen and tell me how customers wanted there desserts modified.
    via OkPay6990
  • First time she asked if we could do the chocolate tart without the gold leaf because a customer thought it was "too fancy" I was like okay sure, weird but whatever. Plated it plain.
    via OkPay6990
  • But then it became constant. She'd ask if we could make the crème brûlée less "burny" on top. Thats literally the entire point of crème brûlée. She wanted me to do our earl grey panna cotta without the earl grey because someone didn't like tea. Just like. Make a different dessert at that point.
    via OkPay6990
  • I tried explaining that the menu was designed a certain way, these were my recipes, but she'd do this thing where she'd be like "but the customer really wants it" with this pouty face. And I didn't want to be the difficult chef stereotype so I'd usually just modify it.
    via OkPay6990
  • It was getting rediculous though. My sous chef asked why we were basically running a custom dessert operation. I said I don't know, trying to keep Ashley happy I guess.
    via OkPay6990
  • Then last Saturday we were slammed. Full restaurant, two hour wait list. And Ashley comes back during the dinner rush and says table eight wants the deconstructed apple tart but can we put it back together because they "don't understand why its all spread out like that."
    via OkPay6990
  • I was so done. So I just stopped what I was doing and I was like "Ashley why did they order the deconstructed apple tart if they wanted a regular apple tart." And she got all defensive like "they didn't know what deconstructed meant."
    via OkPay6990
  • And I just. I wiped my hands on my apron and walked out to table eight myself. My chef de cuisine was like what are you doing but I was already going.
    via OkPay6990
  • I got to the table and introduced myself and said I heard there was some confusion about the dessert. They seemed kind of surprised to see me. I explained that deconstructed meant we were serving the components
    via OkPay6990
  • seperately so you could experience each element, but if they preferred a traditional preparation I could absolutely make them our classic tarte tatin instead. They were actually really cool about it and said oh that makes sense, we'll try it as designed.
    via OkPay6990
  • Walked back to the kitchen. Ashley followed me and was like "you made me look bad." I said no, you were making me remake dishes all night because you weren't explaining the menu properly. Thats literally part of your job.
    via OkPay6990
  • She complained to our manager that I went over her head. Manager pulled me aside and I explained the whole three months of modifications. Manager was like wait, you've been doing custom orders every night? When
    via OkPay6990
  • I told him everything he basically said Ashley needs to actually read the menu descriptions and understand what she's selling before taking orders.
    via OkPay6990
  • They made her do a full menu tasting the next day. She had to try every dessert and learn what everything was. She's barely talked to me since except for when absolutely necessary.
    via OkPay6990
  • But like. I spent years developing these recipes. You can't just crowdsource the menu based on whatever random requests come in.
    via OkPay6990
  • Also maybe don't tell a pastry chef how to make desserts when you thought crème brûlée was supposed to be soft on top.
    via OkPay6990
  • A bakery chef bakes in a professional kitchen.
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • ceviche_dumpling >So I just stopped what I was doing and I was like "Ashley why did they order the deconstructed apple tart if they wanted a regular apple tart." And she got all defensive like "they didn't know what deconstructed meant." I think she didn't know the meaning of deconstructed.
    via OkPay6990
  • LiquorishSunfish That you went over her head??? As if she is somehow equal or higher ranked than you in the order of operations??? I say this as a former server - babe, the cash register has more seniority than you.
    via OkPay6990
  • DisturbingPragmatic The fact you put up with that horse shit for 3 months is astonishing.
    via OkPay6990
  • No_Philosopher_1870 If crème brûlée is soft on top, wouldn't it be baked custard? This is nowhere near the same, but years ago, I had to try every flavor of ice cream at Baskin- Robbins so that I could advise the customers about different flavors. The handbook advised people not to attempt to taste all the flavors in one day.
    via OkPay6990
  • Triggerunhappy I like in this that instead of a dressing down she got additional training
    via OkPay6990
  • PainterOfThe Horizon She had to taste all the desserts and she was pouty about it??
    via OkPay6990
  • Correct_Cat4414 Ashley needs to work at Burger King, where they "make it your way"
    via OkPay6990
  • Hey-Just-Saying And now I want crème brûlée. LOL!
    via OkPay6990
  • EatMyPixelDust Why does this sound so... fake?
    via OkPay6990
  • andronicuspark Was she trying to talk the table into these alterations? "I dont like Earl Grey, myself personally! Let's see if the chef just happens to have a plain one on hand!" "Hey, that looks burnt! Burnt is always bad! Let's see if the chef will just make this sugar melty!" What a fucking moron. NGL, an entire tasting menu with education seems pretty great.
    via OkPay6990

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customer service server restaurant server life chef dessert restaurant work tales from your server
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