Mom forbids her 17-year-old son from seeing his girlfriend after he failed his French exam: 'He got every answer wrong except for 2 on a 50 question exam.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Mar 14, 2026 8:00 AM EDT

Is this a reasonable punishment, or is his mom pushing him too hard to succeed academically?

Every parent has different grounds for grounding their kids. Were you one of those kids who couldn't hang out with your friends if your GPA dropped below a 4.0? If so, I'm sorry that your childhood was like that. I'm also sorry for the kids whose parents never punished them for anything and just let them run amok. They have much more difficulty in adulthood than their peers, whose parents punished them within reason. If you feel like you can get away with anything, you're going to spend a lot of time trying to get away with anything, which will always come back to haunt you in the end. 

When a kid starts acting up, there is usually more to the story. If a teen who usually gets straight As starts failing spectacularly, the solution might not be to ground him until his grades improve. As a parent, it's best to approach situations like this with compassion, especially if your kid is doing something totally out-of-character for them. They might need a shoulder to cry on more than they need a voice in their ear telling them that they're a failure. Chances are, a straight-A student who has failed their first test feels bad enough without their parents berating them. They might also be cracking under the pressure of their parents' high expectations.

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  • Teenager student sitting in classroom working on exam
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The teen in this story is struggling with his French class. He got 2 out of 50 questions right on his last exam, so now he's earning a D in the class. When his mom found out, she swiftly grounded him, but some readers think that she's putting too much pressure on him to succeed. 

  • Am I the bad guy for making my son miss out time with his girlfriend because he didn't have all A's?

    I (34F) had my son (17M) when I was 17, which wasn't a smart part on my end.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I never got the opportunity to go to college, and I currently have a weak job, and it's hard to financially support my son and I without my parents help (they help often though).
    via u/Leechgo
  • My son (we'll call him Hank) has a very great life so far. He is the president of the yearbook club, and overall he has all A's, and 1 B.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I constantly try to push him, so he can go on and go to college, something I have dreamed of for him since I wasn't able to go to college.
    via u/Leechgo
  • So far, he has been fine. He has wonderful grades, and he's already looking at scholarships for college.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I am honestly so proud of him, and he is happy too. He is excited to go into engineering, and I am thrilled he wants to.
    via u/Leechgo
  • Man in blue and white checked shirt wearing safety glasses while working in engineering
    via ThisisEngineering

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Hank also has a girlfriend, whom we will name Jane. Jane is a wonderful influence on Hank, and she is very determined like Hank.
    via u/Leechgo
  • Jane would like to be a astrophysicist, and that's obviously no easy task. Well, Jane invited Hank to go to with her to a dinner date at the local visiting carnival.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I was so happy when Jane had invited Hank, but then I checked his grades (I always check to to make sure he doesn't need help with anything) and he had. a D in French.
    via u/Leechgo
  • Turns out, Hank had bombed his French test, and had received an F on the final exam, and had gotten all of the answers wrong except for 2 (out of 50 questions).
    via u/Leechgo
  • I sat Hank down and told him that he could always ask me for help, and he said he didn't want my help.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I then told him that he couldn't go with Jane, and that made him so upset.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I hate having to scold Hank so hard, but bombing his French test like that is something that I feel could've been prevented.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I had Hank talk to Jane and Hank said Jane understood. I told Hank I could help him with his French, and he said no to the help.
    via u/Leechgo
  • I feel so bad for not letting him go, but the carnival comes around every single year around this time.
    via u/Leechgo
  • Ferris wheel and carnival games at night
    via Richard Sagredo

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Would I be the AH for not letting him. go? I appreciate all the advice, harsh and maybe not so harsh.
    via u/Leechgo
  • CogentCogitations "I constantly try to push him, so he can go on and go to college, something I have dreamed of for him" A bit of an a hle for this. You should be helping him towards his dreams (within reason), not yours. Also, it sounds like you want straight to punishment without actually talking to him about what is going on. His grade here is out of character for him--the why is much more important than the actual grade.
    via u/CogentCogitations
  • Ryjeska YTA. Poor kid
    via u/Ryjeska
  • Miserable-Chapter883 That kid is more burnt out than charcoal. You're stripping him of potentially the one thing that he enjoys spending his time with. Realistically, this poor kid is being punished and dragged through h I for something that you want for him, while completely discrediting what he wants for his own life. Hoping this dinner hasn't already happened and been missed out on, you need to let him go, and then you can worry about his grade in French afterwards. I understand this is only
    via u/Miserable-Chapter883
  • diggeryydoo ΥΤΑ.
    via u/diggeryydoo
  • CosmicNebbie3456 So instead of asking your kid more information on what happened, you just assumed it was because of the girlfriend? Did he talk to his teacher? Is he struggling in other aspects? Have YOU talked to the teacher?
    via u/CosmicNebbie3456
  • GoetheundLotte YTA, for being so hard-al regarding one bad grade. Honestly, you are just asking for your son to majorly rebel (and indeed, this would definitely be on you).
    via u/GoetheundLotte
  • Unable_Fix3847 YTA. If this was an ongoing issue I'd understand. But it's one class. Maybe French just isn't for him? If he's doing well in every class except for this then there's something wrong beyond studying and doing the work. This kid is probably really stressed and you took away the thing that made him feel better. Let's face it. Your mistakes as a teen have made you become a parent that will hound him
    via u/Unable_Fix3847
  • Inner_Thought1802 YTA stop trying to live thru your children. Luckily he is 17 and can get rid of you soon, and finaly get out of your hovering.
    via u/Inner_Thought1802
  • Soft_Measurement4080 Yeah Hank is 100% cutting you off once he goes off to college.
    via u/Soft_Measurement4080

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boyfriend teenagers parenting grades girlfriend high school french mom son exams
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