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Man and woman enjoy date night at a restaurant.
The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.
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Ok, ready to read these "kind" messages?
Here's what the girl said. Let's note that she apologized for being awkward, and said that she hoped her date had a nice time. This is actually kind of her! She isn't asking for a second date; maybe she's aware that things went south. And in return, here's what her date replied back to her.
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I could talk about this message all day, and so could a lot of people online
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Now, the best way to handle this would've been with immense kindness.
Is it weird to cry on a date? Yes, it is. But if you have empathy for that person, you could assume that they are going through a tough time in life, and that they still wanted to try and go on a date to see if things worked out. Haven't you ever cried at an inopportune time? Didn't you wish for grace during that moment? Come on, man.
That person is having a rough time, and all you have to do is say something like, “It was lovely to meet you, but I don't think we're a match for each other. I wish you all the best in your future dating endeavors!” Then never speak to her again. Let her figure out her own issues with people around her who actually care about her wellbeing.
But this guy. This guy! He chose the most obnoxious, patronizing, condescending way to tell this woman that he didn't want to go on a second date with her.
However. What's most delicious here has been watching the internet absolutely dog-pile onto this fellow, scolding him for his unkind therapy-speak toward someone who probably needed a hug more than an uncalled-for assessment of her mental state.
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Preach, brother
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The guy explained why he didn't ghost her, but...
People took issue with him describing his words as "kind" and "honest." Honesty is not always kind. Speaking to someone in this manner is not nice.
He reminds me of those people who are radically honest, never telling even so much as a white lie, and end up nuking their social life because they're insufferable to be around.
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Why did he post this if he's such a good guy? Oh, it's because he needs validation from strangers that he's soooo good
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This dude thinks this is a good reason to tell the date all that stuff in the text
I actually think it makes it worse though! If you can tell she's struggling already, telling her to work on herself isn't the move.
In fact, it's clear that you don't want it to be your problem, so just gently decline and move on. It's her issue to figure out — no doubt she already knows the date went poorly and she'll have to try again next time. You live and learn… but you also can't just go around telling people to work on themselves, it comes off as impolite and unhinged.
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She is probably mortified and upset! And she kindly replied to you because she has social awareness about the way that words can impact people
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Self-assured man texts date to turn her down before tweeting about it.
The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.
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People pointed out that a "nice" person would not be sharing texts from someone they tried to humble during a tough time in her life
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SHE will know about this!
At the moment, this post has been viewed 16.5 million times. It's on the trending page with a full summary! There's no way this woman hasn't seen this by now if she's on X at all.
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People began memeing the messages, too
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Man and woman chat during coffee date.
The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.
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