Remote employee is written up for going to the dentist at 2pm despite notifying their team and covering all tasks: 'It feels so small and so insane at the same time'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Apr 16, 2026 10:00 AM EDT

Should you be allowed to schedule an appointment in the middle of the workday? 

Every job is different and requires a different level of flexibility. You learn what you can get away with while on the job, and it's important not to color outside of those lines unless absolutely necessary. But we are all human, and we have human needs. One of those is going to appointments. And if you've ever been an adult with a 9-5 who wants to make a dentist appointment, you know how difficult it is. Dentists tend to keep 9-5 hours too, and if they do have after-work slots, they tend to go pretty fast. It's not uncommon to have to take some time out of your workday to do all the maintenance you need to do just to keep yourself in the game. But it's up to you and your boss on how to navigate that. 

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  • A man sits at a table using his laptop, from above
    via Unsplash+ (Natalia Blauth)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Got written up for going to the dentist at 2pm while working from home.

    this one still doesn't feel real. i've been remote for almost 3 years. my dentist is 5 minutes from my house. i had a cleaning scheduled for 2pm on a Wednesday. i blocked my calendar, told my team i'd be offline from 1:45 to 3, finished every deliverable that was due that day before noon.
    via Fit_Average8352
  • went to the dentist. came back. answered a few emails. normal day. two days later my manager sends me a message saying my "availability gap" was flagged by our workforce management system and he needs to "document it." i explained it was a dentist appointment during a blocked calendar slot. he said he understood but the system flagged it and he has to follow the process.
    via Fit_Average8352
  • so now i have a written note in my file because i went to the dentist during working hours. something that anyone in an office does literally all the time without even telling their manager. the crazy part is nobody needed me during that hour. nobody tried to reach me. the flag was automatic. the software noticed i wasn't active for 70 minutes and generated an alert.
    via Fit_Average8352
  • this isn't about the dentist. this is about being monitored by software that treats any break in activity as suspicious. even when you tell everyone in advance. even when nothing is affected. i don't know what to do with this. do i push back? do i just eat it and move on? it feels so small and so insane at the same time.
    via Fit_Average8352

  • Sometimes you think you have done everything right, and you still end up on the wrong side of something. This isn't a good feeling. You've done all the steps you could think of, crossed your t's and dotted your i's and yet… here you are. That's because we can't control the way people react to us. We can only control the way we react. When this type of miscommunication happens at work, it can be particularly destabilizing. Nobody wants to get in trouble, and you don't want to fear the loss of your job over something small. That's what happened here, though, after one employee went to what they thought was a routine appointment. But the problem was, their boss didn't see it that way. They thought they had gotten all the necessary clearance, and didn't let any of their work tasks slip, but that wasn't the case. The employee was left wondering what they could do in this situation. They weren't sure if they were right in this situation, so they needed more eyes on the story. Keep reading to see what happened between the employee and their boss. 

  • Commenters wondered if there might be more going on here.

    TrekJaneway So, you ask the question - "what is the proper procedure if I need to take an hour off for a medical or dental appointment?" There should be one. This is a perfectly normal thing.
    via TrekJaneway
  • uckfu Yeah. That's weird if the office culture has always been flexible. The best bet, ask your manager how things like this need to be handled from here on out?
    via uckfu
  • Somethings changed with the management and they either are willfully disregarding communications about it (since it will be unpopular) or they are as ill Informed as you are.
    via uckfu
  • My office, we have that same culture. You have an appt? No one questions it. They are super flexible with how and where you work. Even in or out of the office. Just be responsible and responsive.
    via uckfu
  • A man sits on his couch using his laptop
    via Unsplash+ (Clay Banks)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • TenorClefCyclist If you're an exempt (salaried) employee not subject to overtime, then you did everything right. If they want to dock you for an afternoon dentist appointment, then it starts to look like you are actually paid "by the clock" and
    via TenorClefCyclist
  • they'll need to pay you for those late nights finishing a presentation or bid response. Email HR and ask them if you should claim 75 minutes of sick leave instead. That should make them panic, because it's red flag for audits of who is really "exempt".
    via TenorClefCyclist
  • No_Land_9882 It's amazing how remote companies monitor time instead of outcomes.
    via No_Land_9882
  • dagobertamp Did you actually book the time off or just assume blocking it off in your calendar was good enough?
    via dagobertamp
  • D3ATHSQUAD I would point blank ask him what the process is for people that have doctor's or dentist appointments during the day and phrase it as "What is the process I need to follow when I have a Doctor's or Dentist Appointment during the day
    via D3ATHSQUAD
  • to avoid being flagged by the system or are you saying that we can not have appointments during the work week or else we get flagged every time?"
    via D3ATHSQUAD
  • Puzzleheaded_... If it's really not allowed just ask if you can use your PTO for any missed time to avoid the write up
    via Puzzleheaded_Focus86
  • C_bells What? Remote or not, people commonly take time. out of their workdays to go to medical appointments. I would ask "okay, so let's say we work in an office. How do I ensure I've requested personal/PTO/sick time off for my appointment?"
    via C_bells
  • Dazzling Vaga... This happened in my office when we stated using activtrak... literally everything needs to be documented, it's so lame. It also makes you far less productive because it's like an hour a day of justifying your day
    via Dazzling_Vaga
  • Coriolanuscangetit Did that amount of time exceed your lunch break? Bc I would imagine the appt would count as your lunch break, if you worked consistently the rest of the day.
    via Coriolanuscangetit
  • Revolutionary_... , this is awful. Is this a company culture problem, or is your manager like this too? I'd start looking for a new job tbh
    via Revolutionary_West56
  • Mountain-Chip... "Something Anyone does litterally all the time without even telling their manager" we might be at different levels but I always tell my manager about appointments just as a heads up and then just set my status to away till x
    via Mountain-Chip7959
  • VinceP312 Well from managements point of view, some remote guy unilaterally decides he's not going to do work for some amount of time... Is he going to the beach? Having a hookup? Taking a nap? Who knows! He didn't tell anyone anything. Next time inform your boss. They're not going to say no with enough notice. What's the cost to you?
    via VinceP312
  • Ok_Passage_6... Of course you push back. Suppose you moved your lunch break to cover it would it still have flagged it? Every time a system like this does something wrong someone. needs to draw attention to it and not eat it because Al is not good enough to determine what's appropriate and what's not appropriate. The metrics S k when you're using a computer to monitor people.
    via Ok_Passage_6
  • On top of that since when our doctors appointments not allowed for viable time off? Is it the fact that you didn't get preapproval for the doctor appointment? I would read your manual from cover to cover and see if there's anything that you
    via Ok_Passage_6
  • did wrong in the way that you took the time off. I would then put a formal response to the letter in your file, calling out every single thing that you did according to the employee manual that the Al called out. There's a procedure for asking time off for appointments for meetings for that stuff. What is it? Why would the Al call it out? That's what you need to write about.
    via Ok_Passage_6
  • 2lit_ Why weren't you just honest and tell them that you needed an hour or so off to take care of a personal matter? Just blocking your calendar and then leaving your house is crazy. Lol and I support fully remote work.
    via 2lit_
  • gingersusie Just tell your manager the next time you have an appointment. Problem solved. Be careful how you handle this, because they could be looking for an excuse for RTO.
    via gingersusie

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