Employee takes 8 brownies from communal tray, coworker considers stopping baking for the office

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
May 12, 2026 10:00 AM EDT

It's never a good look to take more than your share. 

When someone brings snacks to the office, there is an unspoken etiquette about how much you should take and when. It's always better to err on the side of caution in this scenario. You would hate to end up in a situation where you're the person in the office that everyone is talking about, but nobody respects. It's best to keep things on an even keel in the office; you would hate to ruffle any feathers and end up on the wrong side of office politics. But it's also best not to judge the habits of others where we can help it. We're all doing our best, and we would hate to be wrongfully accused of doing something that we didn't do. The man in this situation, though, was clearly in the wrong. When someone brings a tray of baked goods to the office, the rule is that you take one. If, at the end of the day, there is a bunch left, then you can take another one. This is the kind of stuff we learn in preschool. Sharing is caring, and we can't take everything for ourselves. If everyone acted that way, then society would collapse. We wouldn't want that, would we? So we probably shouldn't act in a way that jeopardizes everyone's happiness. That's exactly what this guy did, though, and it set his office in a tailspin. 

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  • A person reaches out for oreos sitting on a plate
    via Adrian Regeci

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Would I be in the wrong if I stopped bringing homemade food to the office after one person keeps taking portions meant for the whole team?

    I genuinely enjoy cooking and I have a habit of making extra when I bake or prep something on week ends. A few times over the past few months I've brought things in to share a tray of brownies, some cookies, once a big batch of roasted chickpeas because I made way too many. Nothing elaborate, just surplus from stuff I was already making.
    via Breq4Solace
  • People seemed to appreciate it, which was nice. Became a casual thing. There's one guy, I'll call him Derek, who works in a different part of the office but somehow always appears within about ten minutes of anything being put in the break room. Fine, that's what the break room is for. The issue is the portion sizes. Last time I
    via Breq4Solace
  • brought in a full tray of about 24 brownies, I stepped away for maybe 25 minutes and came back to find Derek had stacked literally eight of them on a plate at his desk. I watched him go back for a second plate later.
    via Breq4Solace
  • I didn't say anything because it felt petty to police brownie distribution. But other people had barely gotten any, a few people mentioned it, and one coworker who I know had been looking forward to them missed out entirely. This has happened more
    via Breq4Solace
  • than once with different things. He's not doing anything technically wrong, the food is there for anyone. But the unspoken understanding of "communal office food" seems to be completely absent for him.
    via Breq4Solace
  • I'm at the point where I either stop bringing things in, or only bring enough for my immediate team and don't put it in the general break room. Would I be the a hole for just quietly stopping the whole thing?
    via Breq4Solace

  • What to do with a coworker who just can't seem to move in the same direction as everyone else? Maybe they're always causing issues and commotion in the workplace, and you just can't seem to make it work with them. You can't see eye to eye, and you don't want to. You wonder what would have to change to make you work well together, and you just can't imagine it. That's the tough situation this employee was in when they sought some outside help from the internet. Keep scrolling to see what they said.

  • A businesswoman eats a sandwich at her desk
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Commenters gave their two cents on the situation.

    OldLadyKick You need to brin gin a plate and walk around to people at their desks and offer 1-2 to each person with a napkin. This excludes Derek. If he finds out and asks- tell him the food is for your nearby co-workers.
    via OldLadyKick
  • anon5381 Leave a note next to it and say "please take one so others can also try" or something along those lines. If it doesn't change leave a note, then in different writing, in a different colour pen write "yeah derek leave some for the rest of us".
    via anon5381
  • Due_Cricket1885 Uh you're not obligated to bring anything for anyone so how can you possibly be the Ah le
    via Due_Cricket1885
  • ImpressionKey3094 Just make zip lock bags and message people, that if they want it to stop by your desk.
    via ImpressionKey3094
  • 21stCenturyJanes This does seem like a pretty easy problem to solve. Don't bring in anything or if you do, don't put it in the break room. OP, are you worried Derek will be upset?
    via 21stCenturyJanes
  • It's a bad idea, especially for women, to build up an expectation like this (non- work related) in the workplace. That doesn't mean you can never share a treat but when you become "the lady who brings us
    via 21stCenturyJanes
  • treats", it backfires either because of people like Derek or because then that's your identity at work. Keep to your team or close friends or don't do it at all.
    via 21stCenturyJanes
  • Lostinhighweeds I used to work w a guy like this. If we ever had a potluck, he never brought anything bc he was a man and didn't cook yet loaded up on everything. It was
    via Lostinhighweeds
  • disgusting. He was a high level manager so no one ever figured out a way to get him to stop but often he was the last to know there was food around.
    via Lostinhighweeds
  • Tomaquetona I really hope that you are exaggerating because if you actually saw EIGHT brownies on his desk (1/3 of how many you brought in) and did not take that opportunity
    via Tomaquetona
  • to say "hey, uh, the brownies are for everyone and you taking 8 is ridiculous," then you are doing it wrong. It is wholly acceptable to call someone out for taking so much of something from the free food in the break room.
    via Tomaquetona
  • If they argue and say "they were just sitting there," then you say "it is fine to pick up whatever is leftover at 5pm, but these haven't been out long enough for everyone to get a chance."
    via Tomaquetona
  • If you really can't even stand that tiny amount of confrontation, then I recommend offering whatever you bring in to your immediate coworkers before putting it into the break room, or keeping it near your part of the office instead of the main break room.
    via Tomaquetona
  • Professional Yam3119 NTA, but I don't understand why you didn't speak up sooner. Someone has to!
    via ProfessionalYam3119
  • guts24601 I bake stuff all the time for my wife and her coworkers. She's had to pretty much police who gets anything because one guy did this in the break room. Now she only gives baked goods to specific people in her office because of one j . NTA
    via guts24601
  • Solid-Musician-8476 I'd have stopped him from taking so much in real time. I'd embarrass him. Meanwhile going forward, I'd email the people you want to share with that you have them at your desk. Then you're in control of how much they take. Don't email Derek.
    via Solid-Musician-8476
  • MHW93 Put a note beside the treats - - "One brownie per person please so there are enough to go around! Check back at the end of the day for leftovers if you would like a second."
    via MHW93

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terrible coworkers employee baking coworkers office life brownies Office food coworker
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