Mom calls potluck participant at 10 PM demanding gluten-free options for her daughter, gets annoyed when they don't have any: 'I didn't want to risk it'

Author image for Ally Perry
Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
May 16, 2026 7:45 PM EDT

Dietary restrictions require a lot of thinking ahead.

Living with a food intolerance or caring for somebody who does can get tiring pretty quickly. For the sake of their health, they have to avoid certain things that half the time seem to pop up in the most unexpected of places. If the issue is severe, there really is no room for error. Responsibility must be taken for the diet.

Considering how many people's social lives revolve around food, this can make many events a fraught experience. The risk of consuming something that contains an ingredient that they can't tolerate constantly hovers over the entire affair unless they choose to bring along food that they have made themselves.

While friends and family often want to be accommodating in these situations, they often need to be briefed well in advance. Not only that, but they need to be trusted to prepare food in the right kind of environment. For those living with the worst kind of issues, there is no room for error. This is not the kind of thing that can be put together last minute without there being some big element of risk.

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  • Triangular sandwiches with lettuce and tomato inside on a wooden plate
    via Dreamer Dude

    Triangular sandwiches with lettuce and tomato inside on a wooden plate

  • In this story, somebody was preparing for a potluck for which they were asked to bring wraps and sandwiches. They began preparing the request and informed everyone attending to message them ASAP if there were any dietary requirements that they needed to keep in mind.

    At 10 PM in the evening, they were called by a mom who asked them to make something gluten-free for their daughter. They didn't have anything available that was suitable, and ended up saying that they couldn't help. The mom judged them for not being able to accommodate, leaving them wondering if they were in the wrong.

  • Am I wrong for refusing to make gluten-free food for someone else’s child at a potluck?

    I am part of a group where we regularly do potlucks. Normally everyone just says what they're bringing and that's the end of it. If there are doubles, most people still bring their dish anyway. Sometimes people get pressured into changing dishes or made fun of for what they bring, which already annoys me.
    via MaiApa
  • If there are doubles and I am asked change I don't mind making something else.
    via MaiApa
  • The latest potluck was planned on a Friday when I was at work. I saw the messages when I got home and everyone seemed to have already provided a dish they would bring. ***keep in mind none of these are gluten free**
    via MaiApa
  • I said I will bring wraps, and sandwiches. I messaged specifically in the group that I am going to purchase the items to make the sandwiches and wraps shortly, so if anyone needs me to grab something small item plz message in the group ASAP.
    via MaiApa
  • A woman in a grocery store with a shopping cart in front of her, looking at a product, with a little girl looking at the opposite shelf
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    A woman in a grocery store with a shopping cart in front of her, looking at a product, with a little girl looking at the opposite shelf

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Later that night around 10 pm one of the wives called me asking me to accommodate her gluten-free child and make gluten-free options too. Her 6 yo daughter is a celiac, but I am not too close with the mom to remember this info.
    via MaiApa
  • I was polite with her and said no I cannot for the following reason. 1- I had already purchased everything and peeped The filings. 2 - it was too late in the night for this conversation 3 - I have no idea how to make gf sandwiches and wraps.
    via MaiApa
  • because Her daughter is severely celiac and I did not want to risk it. I told her I don't feel comfortable making gf food especially for her. I offered I can bring vegetables I have, but the mom said no, because her daughter doesn't like veggies.
    via MaiApa
  • I then checked my fridge and said I have hot dogs, but she advised have to be gf, and the weren't.
    via MaiApa
  • IMO your child has medical dietary needs, I personally think the parent should pack safe food for them instead of expecting one random person at a potluck to suddenly change their entire meal plan. Especially when nobody else in the group was being asked to accommodate this child, just me.
    via MaiApa
  • She sounded disappointed and now apparently people in the group are talking about it like I was ride or selfish.
    via MaiApa
  • A woman sits down and looks at her phone with two young children on either side of her
    via Vitolda Klein

    A woman sits down and looks at her phone with two young children on either side of her

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • ParanoidBrokkoli 10pm is too late to call an acquaintance to pick up & prepare something special
    via ParanoidBrokkoli
  • Her daughter will bring her own food for all her life because one can't always trust others to be informed & caring enough to accommodate if her celiac is that bad. Until she prepares it herself mom has to send her with food
    via ParanoidBrokkoli
  • GM_Organism As someone with celiac disease: that parent is reckless AF and gambling with their kid's health. I would never ever trust an acquaintance to be able to make safe GF food - let alone ASK them to, at the last minute. 100% of
    via GM_Organism
  • those "gluten free" sandwiches would be cross-contaminated, the poor kid would be sick as a dog, and it would be their mother's fault. Celiac folks have to bring our own food to potlucks. It's just how it is.
    via GM_Organism
  • Living-Ad8963 I'd make a point of stating how my kitchen is full of gluten cross contamination and you can't safely make gluten free food. If the daughter is actually celiac, I wouldn't trust someone to make food to the standard of gluten free required.
    via Living-Ad8963
  • Embarrassed-Leg-4246 You did nothing wrong here. The mom is acting crazy about this! I have celiac, and I never in my life would expect someone to provide me with food I can safely eat, even if they offer to make gluten free stuff for me I'm terrified of trying
    via Embarrassed-Leg-4246
  • it because the risk of cross contamination is high if you are not someone who actively knows how to ensure cross contamination does not occur. I'm actually currently suffering 2 days after reluctantly agreeing to Mother's Day dinner at my aunts
    via Embarrassed-Leg-4246
  • house, because somehow there was cross contamination even though they made a big deal about ensuring my meal was gluten free. I decided I will never again eat someone else's homemade meal, because this is not the first time something like this has happened. I will only eat
    via Embarrassed-Leg-4246
  • food that I make, or is strictly a gluten free restaurant. You did absolutely nothing wrong here, and in fact I think this persons mom is not doing HER due diligence in ensuring her child's dietary restrictions are properly implemented. She needs to understand the risks of cross contamination for us people with celiac if she wants her child to be okay.
    via Embarrassed-Leg-4246
  • d1rtf4rm It's her kid, she can handle it.
    via d1rtf4rm

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diet entitled parents cooking parenting potluck daughter gluten free mom
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