Brides share the ridiculous outfits their monster in-laws wore to their wedding: ‘[She wore] a sarree… Neither side of the family is from India.’

Author image for Elna McHilderson
Elna McHilderson • Managing Editor
Jun 30, 2026 2:30 PM EDT

Are "casual attire" weddings even a real thing?

Like, seriously, I have never been to a wedding where people are just wearing whatever the heck they want. And I'm in my mid-30s, so I'm going to several weddings a year at this point! I've never seen a denim-jeans-friendly wedding. So why is it hard for some people to understand a formal dress code? You know how many dresses I have borrowed from girlfriends for a wedding? Or nice dresses I got for $8 at the thrift store that made it to a wedding? It's not that hard. If you need a suit, thrift stores have them too, and then you can get them tailored for pretty cheap. Or borrow a suit from a similarly shaped friend. Like, heck, just wear a button-up and nice pants, and that works too. Jeans? Are you serious… 

Redditor u/shewilldietrying recently went to the site to rant about her father-in-law, who keeps giving her strife about dressing up for their wedding. He wants to wear jeans, but she keeps reiterating that it is formal attire. This dude was in the military; he knows how to dress formal and what a dress code is. What is his deal?

The post has sparked other brides to share what their monster in-laws decided to wear to their weddings. From disrespectfully casual to culturally inappropriate, these in-laws need to grow up. 

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  • A newlywed couple stands with their respective parents outside of the wedding; all are laughing and dressed formally
    via Unsplash+ (Curated Lifestyle)

    A newlywed couple stands with their respective parents outside of the wedding; all are laughing and dressed formally (stock).

  • FIL making an issue out of wedding attire My fiance and I are getting married soon and his dad has been made aware plenty of times what the expectations are for wedding attire. His family's idea of "formal" dress code is jeans, boots, and a button up shirt. I really don't get it and don't relate to it at all, but I won't shame or judge them for it. My family is the complete opposite and we dress to the nines for
    via shewilldietrying
  • everything. So we differ, a lot, in that respect. His dad has asked me at least 5 times now, what he has to wear. I recently have started responding with a long pause and stare, waiting for him to tell me he's joking. But he is de d serious. Almost like he's waiting for my answer to change, hoping I'll finally tell him he can wear jeans.
    via shewilldietrying
  • I tel him everytime, NO jeans. DRESS pants DRESS shoes, and any one of his nice collared shirts is the only thing that's acceptable. It is a semi formal wedding, but I have to stress that it's formal so that he can understand the 'no jeans' rule. He is not poor. Money is not an issue at all. The thing I don't understand is he is such a perfectionist in all regards.
    via shewilldietrying
  • House, yard, garage, cars, are always pristine. Holds his kids and grandkids to insanely high standards. Used to be in the military. But thinks it's appropriate and reasonable to wear jeans to a wedding?! To me that comes across tacky and lazy. Not what I'd expect from someone who is a perfectionist.
    via shewilldietrying
  • I'm not sure how to respond to him anymore. Everytime I've reminded him no jeans, he gets more snarky with me. I'm just struggling to understand what his hang up with jeans is.
    via shewilldietrying
  • A woman wears a saree for an Indian wedding (model).
    via Unsplash+ (Sabesh Photography LTD)

    A woman wears a saree for an Indian wedding (model).

  • Bride1234109 I would let him show up and look silly. I had to do this with my MIL. She kept pushing to wear a saree because it "hides the fat" or whatever. She gained some weight during CO ID and was insecure. There are plenty of dresses out there that would have flattered her figure. Newsflash, neither side of the family is from India or has any background that wears sarees.
    via Bride1234109
  • dressed up. Be sure to use a photo editor to put him in a suit instead. Please don't let this foolishness dim your light as you prepare for your wedding! Congratulations!!
    via Bride1234109
  • Welp, guess who showed up and looked stupid and left early and came back in a regular dress? My MIL. Sometimes, you can't argue with people. As much as I know it bothers you, I'd say let it go and let him look stupid while everyone else is
    via Bride1234109
  • An older man with a long white beard drinks a glass of wine while wearing a button-up shirt, suspenders, and blue jeans (model).
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    An older man with a long white beard drinks a glass of wine while wearing a button-up shirt, suspenders, and blue jeans (model).

  • Ok-Repeat8069 I let my MIL officiate the ceremony. A few months before the wedding, she sees me browsing dresses on GoodGoth.com and starts oooohing, saying "that dress would look so on me! You know, I should wear that for your wedding." I thought it was hilarious and let her do it. The husband and I, and now our kids, crack up every time we look through the photos
    via Ok-Repeat8069
  • A woman gets help lacing up her wedding dress with lace and a veil, while holding a bouquet of flowers (stock).
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    A woman gets help lacing up her wedding dress with lace and a veil, while holding a bouquet of flowers (stock).

  • LibrarianNeat1999 My friend's a h_le BIL is like this. Always gotta go against the grain. He decided he'd show up at her wedding to his brother in khaki's and a Hawaiian shirt because she didn't get to tell HIM what to do. Well, friend and hubby were ready for him got everyone to come up to him and - say 'What's with the stupid tacky getup' or something to that effect. It drove him bonkers
    via LibrarianNeat1999
  • and he ended up leaving after the wedding in a huff. Tried to show up at the reception in shorts and t-shirt just to show her who was the boss (he has issues with women clearly). He was kicked out by the very formal venue which required shirt, ties, dress pants and shoes lol. He's hated her ever since.
    via LibrarianNeat1999

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bride groom married life monster in law mother in law family weddings
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