25+ of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week (September 5, 2026)

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Sep 5, 2026 4:30 PM EDT

Tweets for the long weekend, good sir. 

We're heading into a long weekend, and we might be looking for ways to spend some time in a relaxing way. We want to kick our feet up and spend some time in a relaxing way. We want to kick our feet up and enjoy life the way it should be enjoyed. If you're lucky enough to have a break this weekend, then you're probably wanting to use it to the fullest extent. You want to make sure that you're getting in all the nutrients you need from the long weekend before fall comes in and demands a lot of work of you. The changing of the seasons always comes along with a change of heart. It's a chance to reflect on what has come before and what will come after. Maybe you have something new that you're going to try in the fall season. Maybe you have a new list of goals and aspirations. Or maybe you want to invest in a new area of your life. Maybe you're really thinking about getting into crocheting, and September is the time you're finally gonna buy some yarn. 

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  • 01
    Mad Men Quotes @Mad MenQts • 49m Thems the rules It's Labor Day weekend. Between now and Monday we have to fall in love a dozen times.
    via MadMenQts
  • 02
    @magicinmypocket • Sep 2 Pad See Ew mogs Pad Thai but they don't want you to know that
    via MadMenQts
  • 03
    Mason Home ... @bankerto... Sep 20 • ... "America doesn't have outdoor dining!" Then explain this noodles&compreh MEDITERRANEAN
    via MadMenQts
  • 04
    Isaac @isaacturnersong - Sep 1 Saying the floor is yours to a crumb
    via MadMenQts
  • 05
    cap alopecia chlamydia @usedwifi - Sep 1 @mazzypopstar. 4h Streets are sayin Little Caesars New Crazy PuffsⓇ are a yummy hit?!?! • ariel @teenageheartt · Aug 31 ns@lippre night that Ella alists alive. eve ter than in-stu ome songs to s main pop girls can't hit the r watching the paychecks roll in real time i'm cryingggg 36 339
    via MadMenQts

  • Fall is a great time to roll our sleeves up and get to work. Maybe it's just the leftover feeling from being a kid and having to go back to school in the fall, or maybe it's the crisp air that makes us feel like we can sit on our desks and really accomplish something. But before we get there, we have Labor Day weekend. It's the last breath of summer, and we're hoping to enjoy it in all the ways we know how. These tweets are a perfect way to do that. They are silly and goofy and take our mind off of anything serious. They make us feel seen and heard and related to, and they're going to make no apology for that. They are made by silly people for silly people on a silly occasion. So if that sounds like something you want, then look no further. These are the freshest and funniest tweets of the week, at least according to me. 

  • 06
    Mr. Biscuit @Personhavingfun Sep 1 ... . Oooo I love pants + iMessage I have pants on Delivered
    via MadMenQts
  • 07
    geeked me... @Geeked Me... Sep 15. tildelta @tildeltal • actual interaction i had last night my last name is bro is out of names after this 00
    via MadMenQts
  • 08
    phosph... @phos... • Sep 1 Co Due to the Unfortunate! We are deeply out of Onions! Thanx for the understanding ~Management~ ere EVERYDAY FA COMBOS INCLUINE HED F GERS DA DA Grab Flavor That's Got Game Coke ZERO SUGAR CHERRY Coca-Cola Coca-Cola ZERO SUGAR I VANILLA Coca-Cola Coca-Cola Wendys PROUD PARTNERS OF MARCH MADNESS UPGRAD YOUR CO
    via MadMenQts
  • 09
    Mael @shutupmael • Sep 1 (to a 29 year old) look if we're not married by 30 let's marry each other
    via MadMenQts
  • 10
    edolls @erredeemeble Sep 1 • ice spice should say No Yanny I rest on my Laurels next song ...
    via MadMenQts
  • 11
    • Тиpекс @Tazzmoeq2d Aug 31 Translated from Russian When people ask what music I listen to, but my playlist can be calmly described by this picture
    via MadMenQts
  • 12
    • Mandrak... @tengridy... Sep 2 I keep an empty picture frame on my desk as a reminder that I have nothing & I am nothing.
    via MadMenQts
  • 13
    • jan levin... @janlevins... Sep 2 Your man posting 12 pics to say goodbye to summer
    via MadMenQts
  • 14
    caitie del... @caitiede... Sep 1 ... getting a job is lowkey goated when requiring money to live is the vibe
    via MadMenQts
  • 15
    brit @booritney - Sep 1 just heard a man order a pastry by saying "imma say what's up to this bread over here"
    via MadMenQts
  • 16
    MA @getinnnocuous • Sep 1 moving out means saying goodbye to this bisexual hamilton fanart i made in seventh grade No MATTER WHAT THEY TELL YOU
    via MadMenQts
  • 17
    • Ray Wise Saying... @... Sep 1 i can relate bc back in high school i realized one of my friends sucked so i upgraded and started hanging with the chiller younger brother UPDATES Film U... @Fil... Aug 30 • Dave Franco will return in 'THE STUDIO' Season 2. (Via @joshuahorowitz)
    via MadMenQts
  • 18
    • Brian Haley @brianchaley Sep 1 50 bucks left after paying rent ...
    via MadMenQts
  • 19
    cav empty@cavempty_ Sep 1 ... gm JUST RUBBEN AND RUBBEN ON MY YELLOW LEG
    via MadMenQts
  • 20
    Today Year... @todayye... Aug 31 Ø When I was a kid, I thought the tomatoes in Ratatouille were pepperonis. Somehow, I also thought the squash was yellow pepperoni. I genuinely believed it was all pepperoni. Every Movi... @everymo... .Aug 30 This scene alone deserves an Oscar. 0:29
    via MadMenQts
  • 21
    Brooks Otterlake @i_zzzzzz • Aug 31 Women are so complex... My simple pleasures Candies (not all, specific ones) 0 ...
    via MadMenQts
  • 22
    Isabella @haveacigar21 Aug 31 ... • Dave Portnoy chefk... @girlflop... • Aug 29 jeremy allen white beard is doing it for ME NJAY
    via MadMenQts
  • 23
    gen @meowknightt • Aug 31 Photos - 43m What a month... Did we really do all this? Useful Not Useful וות • • •
    via MadMenQts
  • 24
    walker @walkercapl • Aug 29 You are a Demi Lovato fan account. It's your job to be familiar with her game Buzzing Demi Buzzing...@buzzi... • Aug 27 Fan account Demi Lovato I wasn't familiar with your game 0:44 From best of demi
    via MadMenQts
  • 25
    Dej @dejthem · Aug 30 situationship dropped a new banger Forwarded Good morning babe + Today 10:13
    via MadMenQts
  • 26
    love my ball @ijimaia · Aug 30 ... . We'd probably chop it up! I am very friendly. Girlsin... @F... Nov 6, 2025 • She sits at your table, what do you do? 0:00
    via MadMenQts

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