Common Oxymorons
Yo, comic artist, I'mma let you finish, but I just gotta say you forgot "cool hipster" and "gun safety." - Matty Malaprop
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Boss fires employee for refusing to illegally drive to work during a hazardous snowstorm: 'My county had a Level 3 snow warning, it's illegal for me to drive to work.'
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Snowed-in employee calls off at 5 AM, boss tries to send ride share to pick them up anyway: 'The roads are so bad here'
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17-year-old brother refuses to drive his sister's friend to school after she rejected his advances: 'Continuing to be around Melissa was making it harder for him to move on.'
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Successful musician refuses to use his savings to pay off in-laws' mortgage, leading their home to be foreclosed, family resents the decision: 'You could easily pay it'
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54-year-old dad spends $130K set aside for his grandchildren's education on a boat because his adult children don't have kids, adult children freak out: 'They admitted that they expected me to leave them a good inheritance.'
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