25 High Quality Twitter Zingers That'll Get You Chuckling

Twitter is a sacred place. It's a place where people can reveal their innermost thoughts... and some people's innermost thoughts are hilarious. We selected some of the juiciest and most random posts on Twitter for your enjoyment. If this isn't enough, there's always more to keep you entertained. You're welcome.

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Dad and his affair-partner wife try to take his 2 kids out of school for 3 weeks to go on a healing vacation because she found out she couldn't have children of her own: 'He said that school isn't more important than family.'

Dad and his affair-partner wife try to take his 2 kids out of school for 3 weeks to go on a healing vacation because she found out she couldn't have children of her own: 'He said that school isn't more important than family.'

Man builds dollhouse for 28-year-old wife, brother gets offended when he won't give it to his 13-year-old niece for her birthday: 'He told me that I was teasing her'

Man builds dollhouse for 28-year-old wife, brother gets offended when he won't give it to his 13-year-old niece for her birthday: 'He told me that I was teasing her'

Dad cuts off his mom for feeding his allergic 4-year-old daughter cookies and cakes, refusing to babysit forcing him to lose out on a job offer: 'Mom tells the entire family that I refuse to see her for no reason'

Dad cuts off his mom for feeding his allergic 4-year-old daughter cookies and cakes, refusing to babysit forcing him to lose out on a job offer: 'Mom tells the entire family that I refuse to see her for no reason'

32-year-old woman tries to start workplace romance with coworker, complains when his 15-year-old daughter tells her he's not interested: 'She told me to take a hint'

32-year-old woman tries to start workplace romance with coworker, complains when his 15-year-old daughter tells her he's not interested: 'She told me to take a hint'

34-year-old man allows his female friend to use his female roommates expensive shampoo and conditioner, asks her why she hid them from her the 2nd time she tried to use them: 'It’s not my responsibility to provide spa products for her'

34-year-old man allows his female friend to use his female roommates expensive shampoo and conditioner, asks her why she hid them from her the 2nd time she tried to use them: 'It’s not my responsibility to provide spa products for her'

33-year-old single childless woman refuses to go on family vacation where she's forced to pay the same share as families of 3 and babysit her toddler nieces and nephews: 'We [take care of the kids] every day, it’s your turn'

33-year-old single childless woman refuses to go on family vacation where she's forced to pay the same share as families of 3 and babysit her toddler nieces and nephews: 'We [take care of the kids] every day, it’s your turn'

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