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25 Hilarious Quips From Overheard In San Francisco

Ah, San Francisco. The highest rent in the country and the tech capital of the U.S. You just know these people have some sh*t to say. Here's our proof. 

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  • 1
    Text - "I'm taking my children to San Francisco to see colleges. We're going to Stanford and Alcatraz so they know they're either going to college or prison." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 2
    Text - "Did they really replace their pasta menu with quinoa bowls?!" "It's so hard to find carbs in this city." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 3
    Text - "I fly into lax." "You mean L A X?" "Oh, is that how you pronounce it? thought it was like laxative." Boverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 4
    Text - "Are you getting so excited for the festival, or whatever you call it?" "A conference." Doverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 5
    Text - "Three years, wow, she's really vesting in that relationship." "You mean nesting." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 6
    Text - "I want to be the first private citizen to own a satellite." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 7
    Text - *Waiting in checkout line "Oh, you only have a basket, the 10 items or less line is really short." "That's ok, this is my time to meditate." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 8
    Text - "What time should I come over?" "Pregame starts at 6:00, calling ubers at 7:00... but we're doing a photoshoot on the roof at 6:45." Doverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 9
    Text - "Is Azkaban still like, an active prison?" "I think you mean Alcatraz, and no." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 10
    Text - *Guy walking d own street cradling huge bouquet of flowers Guy across the street, screaming: "IT'S NOT GONNA WORK, BRO!" Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 11
    Text - Professor to Class: "We could talk about rhetoric theory but since I'm not a recent grad with a master's degree from Bumfuck University, we're not going to. Let's watch a movie." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 12
    Text - "Dating in San Francisco is expensive but you make up for it in the long run by never logging out of their Hulu and Netflix subscriptions." @overheardsanfrancisco
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  • 13
    Text - "It feels like it's getting pretty serious." "Did he ask you to be exclusive?" "No, but we did a Blue Apron meal together." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 14
    Text - "Every night I sleep in my closet room, I think of the money I'm banking for Tartine bread." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 15
    Text - Girl 1: "Why did you guys break up?" Girl 2: "Cultural differences." Girl 1: "Oh, where's he from?" Girl 2: "Ohio." @overheardsanfrancisco
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  • 16
    Text - "Do you know what people wear to Bottlerock?" "It's like what you wear to Coachella if you're 40." @overheardsanfrancisco
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  • 17
    Text - Tech coworkers: "Is this recyclable?" "There are 5 different bins in the kitchen, you can't throw anything away in this office without being trash-judged." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 18
    Text - "I usually like older men, but he reminds me of my dad... He doesn't have Snapchat and he still thinks soy milk is healthy." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 19
    Text - "She suggested a rooftop bar, but I look terrible in wind." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 20
    Text - "What do you usually wear to work?" "I have only two looks, homeless lesbian or vice principal." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 21
    Text - Flight attendant demonstrating oxygen masks: "If you're traveling with a child, I'm sorry. If you're traveling with multiple children, choose the one with the highest earning potential." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 22
    Text - 3 girls discussing baby names: "We're not hunters, so I'm not sure how I feel about the name Hunter." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 23
    Text - "He sounds great, does he have a hot friend?" "He does, I was planning to sleep with both of them but you can have him." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 24
    Text - "Where's the party, in the hills?" "Yes but this isn't LA so we don't say it like that." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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  • 25
    Text - Professor: "That's why they take their sports so seriously in lowa, there's nothing else to do there. All they have is corn." Coverheardsanfrancisco
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