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Women On Tumblr Tell Male Writers All The Wrong Things They Think About Their Female Characters

And there are so many things!

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  • 1
    Text - annerocious Dear Men Writers Lesser known facts when writing women: High heeled shoes don't become flats if you break the heels off The posts of earrings aren't sharp Nail polish takes a long time to dry and smudges when wet. You can't hold in a period like pee. Inserting a tampon is not arousing or sexual in any way, ever. Feel free to add your own.
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  • 2
    Text - deliciouspineapple - Bras leave red marks on the skin under and around boobs and it is a magical experience when taken off. - Make up can take anywhere from 5 to 25 minutes depending on how skilled you are. - Taking hair out of a ponytail after wearing it for hours does not make it perfectly straight when it comes down - Hair when wet sticks to the skin it no longer flows, idiot -When women with long hair kiss, turn around, do anything, their hair falls in the way. - Stockings are itchy a
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  • 3
    Text - ivegotthetriforce - Pantyhose, tights, leggings, and stockings are each different - Waxing hurts and leaves red skin for a while afterwards while shaving leaves stubble - Most can't run in heels unless they have been VERY worn - Insecurity in appearance doesn't mean "buy me a drink" - EVERYONE HAS DIFFERENT TASTES IN EVERYTHING
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  • 4
    Text - mistytang -Having large breasts sucks. It sucks beyond belief. If a garment happens to fit your large chest, odds are it won't fit the rest of you. Underboob sweat is real and terrible. Bending over for extended periods of time will tweak your back out. Running can be painful due to boob turbulence. Bras are hella expensive. Big breasts are not fun
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  • 5
    Text - angryschnauzer Putting a tampon in isnt a quick bend-poke- done kinda deal. It involves cubicle yoga, messy hands, numerous curse words as you realise it isnt in correctly and have to take it out and start again with a new one
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  • 6
    Text - cassiopeiassky Yes to all of this. But also: If her hair is in an updo, one does not simply remove a hairpin to send her hair cascading down her back. No. If her hair is an updo, it will take at least an hour and an extra set of hands to remove the 137 bobby pins that are holding her hair in place. Furthermore, there's probably a can's worth of hairspray in there, intended to withstand category 2 hurricane winds. There's no cascading happening here - the best you can hope for is a misshap
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  • 7
    Text - jennytrout We have never, ever looked in a mirror and silently described our nude bodies to ourselves, especially the size/shape/weight/resemblance to fruit/etc. of our breasts
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  • 8
    Text - fire-is-her-water When we're alone, we usually wear whatever's comfortable - like a baggy tee shirt and comfy pajama pants. We eat the popcorn we drop in our cleavage and stand in the kitchen scratching our asses while trying to decide what to eat. We burp, fart, pick our noses, and do everything normal humans do. A woman home alone is extremely unlikely to be posing seductively in her best lingerie with her hair and makeup done. She's probably eating cold pizza with her hair in a ponytai
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  • 9
    Text - bemusedlybespectacled Crying is ugly. It doesn't just make your mascara run, it makes your eyes go all red and your face all blotchy People with long hair (and short hair, if they know what's good for them) put conditioner in their hair after shampooing. This is an oily substance that makes the hair shiny and soft and easy to comb and brush No one's laugh has ever sounded like the pealing of little silver bells. Some people snort or sound like strangled goats
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  • 10
    Text - musicalhell The odds of a woman having smoothly shaved legs and armpits are directly proportional to the amount of skin her clothing bares and/or the amount of fueks she gives at that particular moment. GLASSES ARE NOT COSMETIC. them off, we do not become gorgeous fashion models. We become squinty we whip
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  • 11
    Text - thatsnicebutimmarried -most women wear bras. Yes, even when they are trying to dress sexy. Because bras make boobs look perkier and rounder, which is something men apparently find sexy, so being a seductress or femme fatale is not an automatic reason for a female character to not be wearing a bra -a good bra will hide headlights, or at the very least drastically reduce their noticeability. A women with enough pointy nipple issues will opt for a padded or molded bra to hide them
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  • 12
    Text - -women's nipples do not automatically become hard pyramids visible through any and all layers of clothing the second they become even slightly aroused. They are not the female equivalent of boners. And even if their nipples do get hard, the bras they are almost certainly wearing (because even a goddamn succubus with big, honkin' knockers for seducing men is gonna have those painful puppies in some kind of boob sling) should keep those pointy nipples from being visible to every other chara
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  • 13
    Text - jabberwockypie - Wearing a bra that doesn't fit HURTS. It's not sexy to wear a bra that's "two sizes too small", it'd make your clothes hang oddly and you'd have a weird, uncomfortable "quad- boob" effect and your back would hurt, BEN AARONOVITCH
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  • 14
    Text - hissorikosrandomness With the heeled shoes, as proof that they don't become flats if you remove the heel there are people who make digitrigrade hooves, paws, and talons using high heeled shoes sans the heel as a base. And they work. Spectacularly well. Stockings/tights are annoying as fuck. Bras are not only essential, particularly for larger sizes (because that can be anywhere from 5-20 pounds of weight just hanging there which is painful and tiring), but they also determine how a shirt
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  • 15
    Text - Reasons women will go in groups, it's not because it's social hour for girls. It's legit for our own safety. The more squicked out we are, the more likely it is that we're going to avoid going anywhere alone. Actually peeing. It doesn't just dribble out because we sit (yes, I've had to explain this) The whole bladder, muscles, pressure thing all works the same way. Yes breaking a nail is annoying. Reasons why, now you have this sharp, jagged thing that catches on EVERYTHING or for the tru
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  • 16
    Text - Periods can vary from mildly annoying to so painful we should be in the hospital. Some women do have cramps that are straight up worse than actual labor. And most of us will do our damndest to grit our teeth and carry on anyway. Due to the whole period thing not only is a woman likely to have a way higher pain tolerance than you expect, we're also way less likely to be phased by blood than movies make out. And we tend to know exactly how to best clean blood off anything. That kissing to g
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  • 17
    Text - beka-tiddalik Fashion isn't something we "just know", it's a skill set based on the fact that very very few stores have equivalent measurements for sizes and even then, different cuts of clothing hang differently, so we often literally don't know until we try something on how well it will fit or if it will fit everywhere. That's why clothes shopping takes ages. Not because we're admiring ourselves in the mirror. Not every woman wears makeup, but even those that don't habitually wear it wi
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  • 18
    Text - Even if we own both parts of the matching underwear doesn't mean we'll wear them together. Comfy bras might be worn a few days in a row before washing. Most women aren't tough "because they had brothers", they're tough because they needed to be. Clothes without pockets are annoying but handbags contain multitudes. Do not underestimate the handbag. In harsh environments like post-apocalyptic wastelands makeup and personal grooming will fall down the priorities list. If we're thinking about
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  • 19
    Text - curlygirl84 We can't put much of anything in our pockets. They are ridiculously small and when we sit down, because our pants are generally form fitting, things fall out or get broken. Hence the need for purses I do not wake up looking cute or beautiful. wake up looking like a homeless person. My hair is totally crazy and I probably don't know what day it is Periods vary depending on the woman. For some, it is barely a concern (a few days of light bleeding) and for others it is living hel
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  • 20
    Text - from-hogwarts-to-trenzalore there are days when i absolutely can't be bothered to put any effort in my appearance. that means unstyled hair, no make-up (and i mean none. at all.) and ridiculously weird outfits. also, i'm always wondering how women in medieval or postapocalyctic scenarios deal with body hair (or if they are bothered at all) apart from not having the time, i don't supposed there is access to razors, shaving cream or wax
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  • 21
    Text - froaderick-fronkensteen If you are a female superhero you are not going to be wearing a regular old bra under your suit. You will be wearing one that will keep your boobs from flopping around. You will also probably wear some sort of spanx or shape wear under your suit because spandex has a special way of accentuating every little flub regardless of how fit you are. And don't get me started on heels. Don't.
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  • 22
    Text - theforceisstronginthegirl in fact if ur a superhero or doing any type of high impact sports you might end up wearing two or three bras if you have large boobs because honestly the only bras i could wear solo r so fking expensive I'm more likely to double up on the cheep stit (even if its probably not that good for me)
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  • 23
    Text - also chafing is a thing that happens. and if you have big boobs it can happen there and it fucking hurts. so if you r writing a female hero/female athlete she's going to be putting a stitton of body powder on before those layers. doubly so in the f king heat of summer. and trust me on this its not glamorous when we do it. and if your gal wears heels every day of her life? she has calf muscles of steel. regardless of body type. srsly boys if you dont believe walk around on your tip-toes al
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  • 24
    Text - rhetoricalproceeds Makeup smudges and mistakes can be made frequently when it's applied Not every woman has large breasts, and the ones who do shouldn't be written off as the slutty "yeah she's had sex with the entire male population of the school" character Hair washing and care is a hassle, especially with long hair Women aren't divided entirely between "tomboy" or "girly girl" only
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  • 25
    Text - smaug-the-wizard fighting or doing any combat/sport with your hair out is hard and gets in your face and stuck in mouth/underarm/on your face when you sweat most women can't do sport with out an actual sports bra we wear bras most days unless the shirt/dress is made for no bras a large amount of women don't wear lingerie underwear daily, clothes, period and activities change what they walking down hill in high heels is hard and some women walk down backwards to make it easier male friends
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  • 26
    Text - orbeavariegata when lying down, turning around or moving about in any way, boobs (especially large ones) change their shape. They just don't stand there like they're waiting for the fricken bus or some shit. they move, they flatten, sometimes they *gasp* sag. neither is a sign of ugliness or age.
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