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Who Said Greek Mythology Couldn't Make For Funny Jokes?

Much of what we take for granted in Western society today comes from Ancient Greece. Democracy? The Greeks. Philosophy? The Greeks. Vending machines? Amazingly, the Greeks. If so much came from the Greeks, what about humor? The answer is here, in these amazing Reddit threads. They prove to us that Greek mythology can make some pretty hilarious (and bad in a good way) jokes. 


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    Text - adambloghart: uscongress: im about to get so tan you guys - Icarus's last words adambloghart Source: uscongress 202,111 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - divawithanunspoiledagenda: plumbones: destiny919: greenhoused: which way does a cyclops wing their eyeliner tumblr user greenhoused is asking the real questions It doesn't matter, because Nobody is going to criticize their makeup. WAS THAT A MOTHER FRACKING ODYSSEY PUN divawithanunspoiledagenda 514,883 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - auryane: hartcondition: yzma: zeus.... IS the father *hera throws chair and has to be restrained by security titans* That's it. That's Greek mythology. are no security titans in greek mythology. hera kills the entire audience and zeus does nothing flapperwitch 322,924 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - ambivalentaboutmarmite: sophiealdred: astoldbygengar: lets just be clear, if you spend the time baking a cake/cookies/brownies, you can eat as many of them as you want and the calories don't count. you made those calories. you're their god. disclaimer: this does not apply to children you have made looking at you Kronos ambivalentaboutmarmite Source: shaniaplain 793,482 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - gothicprep: "GENTLEMEN, WE ARE AT WAR WITH TROY AND MUST NOT DROP OUR GUARD AT ALL" "sir, the enemy gave us a giant wooden horse" "oh rad bring it in" gothicprep 576,216 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - Greek Mythology in 5 words rook2knight Unfortunately, Zeus was feeling horny. amiekaufman 298,321 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - a terrible greek mythology pun thoodleoo: why would prometheus make a good mailman? because it's a job with a lot of de-livering thoodleoo 982 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - Kieron Gillen Follow @kierongillen I wish medusa would stop objectifying people. LIKES RETWEETS 301 624 2:10 PM-28 Jun 2016 comicberks: Goddamn it comicberks 182,777 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - my lack of knowledge of greek mythology will always be my achilles' elbow thoodleoo 15,296 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - earlhamclassics: thoodleoo: thoodleoo: there's a lot of evidence that the iliad and the odyssey were actually composed by a V variety of poets through an oral tradition rather than just by one poet, so what if the homeric texts are actually just a very long game of D&D homer, the dm: okay achilles, agamemnon has just taken away your war prize, what do you want to do achilles' player: i roll to have a diplomatic conversation with agamemnon achilles' player: *rolls a 1* homer: you throw the
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    Screenshot - roastedduck fur-bies: i let the furby skins soak in fabric softener after i washed them and my sis found them and sent me: 結菜松本> Home Active 59m ago pills SUN 8:19 PM River of Styx in our fucking kitchen Type a message... Aa GIF and i have never laughed so hard x'D never do i ever want to hear the words "furby skins" uttered ever again kusari61602 165,745 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - pseudosurfer: memecucker: Has anyone tried to see if chimpanzees or bonobos could be taught to fully master fire this one guy did and he was chained to a mountain to have an eagle eat his liver every day charminglyantiquated Source: memecucker 90,781 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - kestrels: kestrels: no greek god is inherently and wholly "good" or "bad" because they were all flawed and imperfect in some way with different facets of personality and character to serve as a reflection of society and human nature itself oh except for zeus he was a straight up absolute bastard asexualzoro Source: kestrels 95,360 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Stone carving - Joe Saunders @saundersjoe RIP cat who thought sunglasses would stop Medusa 8:15 PM Oct 5, 2017 307K 108K people are talking about this
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    Text - scottishaccentsareawesome: When you realize that Persephone was the Original Hannah Montana (she had the best of both worlds) scottishaccentsareawesome 65 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - just-shower-thoughts Mammals both produce milk and have hair. Ergo, a coconut is a mammal. maliwanhellfires I know you're being facetious, but this is an actual issue with morphology-based phylogeny castiel-for-king leans over and whispers to person beside me* what are they talking about sonneillony *leans over and whispers back* Human ability to quantify and categorize natural phenomena is sketchy at best and wildly misleading at worst nonlinear-nonsubjective consider the coconut bemused
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  • 17
    People - Zeus Hera some mortal
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    Canidae - Cerberus as a puppy, guarding the gates to heck
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    Text - theload: thecaffeinebookwarrior: nerdwarningalert: russiacore: why the f k is no one naming their children after greek goddesses? Name your f king child Persephone?????? Bi ch???????!? If that makes you happy, my name is Demeter In my experience, people named after Greek goddesses are some of the most ethereal, chaotic forces I have ever encountered. Our Art Department's nude model, for example, is a woman named Hera. She's stunningly beautiful, rides motorcycle as a apparently her only v
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  • 20
    Text - Oedipus is the original motherfilker. thelastsaltbender 515 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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    Text - thoodleoo: thoodleoo: do y'all ever wonder if the greeks made up dionysus as an excuse to get absolutely fking wasted some ancient greek dude: dude elektra you got so blasted this weekend that you nearly tore some guy limb from limb and passed out na in the woods elektra, about to invent the mystery cult of dionysus and also maenads: oh, haven't you heard? thoodleoo 27,967 notes Sep 10th, 2018
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