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20 Job Interview Hacks That'll Definitely Leave An Impression

We all know there ain't no stress like job interview stress. Fortunately for the internet, the folks over at The Poke have put together this list of essential interviewing tips that'll make the process much more interesting.

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  • 1
    People - When it's your turn to ask a question say "Does this job come with a free apron cos I'm gonna be cooking." 1 finger gun. thepoke.co.uk
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  • 2
    People - When asked why you'd be suited to the job, pass an ancient scroll along the desk & say "It was foretold." Stare at them. thepoke.co.uk
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  • 3
    People - Be confident but subtle. Tap 'team player in Morse code on the desk with a pen. thepoke.co.uk
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  • 4
    People - When asked to describe yourself in 5 words, say "Atrocious counting skills". Laugh. Open packet of Mini Eggs. thepoke.co.uk
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  • 5
    Event - Remember, every question is a test so when they say "How are you?" reply "Goal orien- tated, thank you." thepoke.co.uk
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  • 6
    Job - Always make eye contact and if you have two interviewers, train your eyes to work independently like a chameleon. thepoke.co.uk
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  • 7
    Job - When asked if you found the place OK, say "I was driven here by cab. Normally of course I'm driven by results!" 4 winks. thepoke.co.uk
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  • 8
    Event - If you're meeting 3 interviewers, bring in a 4 finger Kitkat. Take charge of distributing Kitkat to emphasise leadership. thepoke.co.uk
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  • 9
    Job - Know the interviewer's name and use it during the interview. If you're not sure what it is, call them "Jobsy" or "Jobbo". ১c
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  • 10
    Job - If asked where you see yourself in 5 yrs time, tip them out of their chair, sit on it & say 'Here'. Break open a Fanta. ১c
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  • 11
    Job - Leave a gap in 2011 on your CV. When they ask what you did in 2011 say "Remember the Arab Spring?" and point to yourself ১c
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  • 12
    Job - Make a point of mentioning you failed Reli- gious Studies and say "The only thing I wor- ship is productivity." 2 thumbs up. ১c
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  • 13
    Job - At the beginning, try to make small talk with your interviewer such as "lovely day!" "you look like my real father." thp
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  • 14
    Product - Tell them you're'not an applicant, you're an appliCAN, Lick your finger, hold it against buttock. Make sizzling noise. thp
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  • 15
    Product - Show you're good at delegating responsi- bility by sending someone else to the in- terview. thp
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  • 16
    Job - If asked to describe yourself in 5 words, say "I Will Bring In Cakes!" Produce brownie from yourjacket pocket and smile. thp
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  • 17
    People - Employers check Facebook accounts so make sure all your photos show you looking at a spreadsheet and punching the air tepo.co
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  • 18
    People - Take a call during the interview. Say "I can't talk now I'm going into a tunnel-a tunnel of hope!" Wink at interviewer. tepo.co
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  • 19
    People - Be confident. After answering each ques tion, kiss your fist and say 'nailed' to yourself. tepo.co
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  • 20
    People - If through nerves you feel you have to belch in the interview, belch a word in your favour like "enthusiastic". tepo.co
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