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Funniest Relationship Tweets We Scrolled Past This Week (December 12th, 2018)

Guaranteed to make you laugh, cry or both.

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  • 1
    Text - Boyd's BackyardTM Follow @TheBoydP All I'm saying is I'd rather stick my hand in a tank of piranhas than dig through my wife's purse. 2:33 PM 30 Nov 2018 348 Retweets 938 Likes Co
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  • 2
    Text - The Dad BriefsTM Follow @SladeWentworth In every marriage there is a person who is excited about decorating for Christmas. There is also a husband. 3:15 PM - 4 Dec 2018 250 Retweets 797 Likes
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  • 3
    Text - BufFala la la laaa Jill Follow @Buffalojill Me: "hey what time do you want to eat dinner?" Him: "I dunno, I'm not picky. 6:30, 7?" Me, *to myself* "damn, that's specific" Me, into the phone, "Yes, table for two for 6:37." 2:09 PM 6 Dec 2018 297 Retweets 1,605 Likes
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  • 4
    Text - lil waste of space Follow @pupperonis a boy could ask ur bra size and u could be like "ak-47" and he would respond w "fuck ur so hot II 5:45 PM - 4 Oct 2018 32,820 Retweets 221,607 Likes
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  • 5
    Text - jolly ty Follow @phaithful If you write a girl a handwritten note she's keeping it forever no matter what happens 5:41 PM 6 Dec 2018 36,961 Retweets 171,557 Likes
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  • 6
    Text - M@thew Follow @TweetPotato314 [sinking in quicksand] me: oh no wife: we'll be fine if we just remain still and wait for help me: ok [mambo no. 5 starts to playl me: OH NO 4:37 AM - 5 Dec 2018
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  • 7
    Text - Ms. Havisham Follow @MissHavisham "I'm ONE PERSON trying to hold this whole house together!" my husband hollers in frustration as the kids flee back to the tv, abandoning him with the collapsing gingerbread house. 1:57 PM - 9 Dec 2018 137 Retweets 686 Likes
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  • 8
    Text - sarahdactyl @girlnarly Follow him: i can't handle your OCD any more me: there's the door. take your shoes out of the hermetically sealed bag, turn the knob three times and walk out of my life 8:09 AM - 10 Dec 2018 253 Retweets 1,433 Likes
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  • 9
    Text - clean slate Follow @PleaseBeGneiss WIFE: can you fold the clothes in the dryer? ME: *climbing in* I can try 7:10 PM - 8 Dec 2018 1,506 Retweets 7,273 Likes
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  • 10
    Text - Terry F Follow @daemonic3 me: [breaking awkward silence on drive home] O Tannenbaum, O Holy Night, O Little Town of Bethlehem, O Come All Ye Faithful, O- wife: i don't care how many songs you list, you don't ask the choir to "show me your O faces" 3:11 PM 4 Dec 2018
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  • 11
    Text - Consider John Frazzled Follow @FrazzleMyGimp [hiding my girlfriends Christmas present behind my back] remember how you said we were out of milk 12:09 PM 9 Dec 2018 1,422 Retweets 9,939 Likes
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  • 12
    Text - Llama In An Ugly Christmas Sweater Follow @LlamalnaTux Me: what do you want for Christmas this year Girlfriend: maybe a *wink* diamond *wink* [Christmas morning] Girlfriend: Me: now all we need is a baseball team 3:59 PM 10 Dec 2018 320 Retweets 2,850 Likes
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  • 13
    Text - Marf Follow @MarfSalvador [bursts in carrying 50 inch TV] me: honey look, this was on sale for $279! wife: ooooo00ohhhhhhh midwife: that's it keep pushing 6:30 AM 11 Dec 2018 149 Retweets 1,034 Likes CINton 121412
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  • 14
    Text - L-M-N-O-Penis. Follow @snotnboogers23 Me: Why do you keep buying plants? You'll just kill them. My wife: To remind you what I'm capable of. Me: Oh 10:06 AM 10 Dec 2018 22 Retweets 91 Likes
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  • 15
    Text - Mapaseka Setlhodi Follow @ltsme_Maps Men to their babies: 21 @1Hakz_ I lose interest so fast if you not matching my vibe 10:28 PM - 9 Dec 2018 6,219 Retweets 23,177 Likes
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