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15 Times Tumblr Got Really Deep

There are some real nuggets of gold on tumblr. 


elinorsalo Posted by elinorsalo
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  • 1
    Text - lesserjoke Reblog this post with your weirdest ancestor's name. I had a great-grandfather named Kermit Dickman. wuqs why did you start a competition that you've already won Source: lesserjoke
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    Via Lesserjoke
  • 2
    Product - shiftythrifting Keichup Chis ah yes i was looking for a soap dispenser labeled "ketchup" with a picture of grapes artenega I really want this bottle in my bathroom. l'd place it next to matching decorative soaps and towels as if it seems like it fits, but l'll actually fill the thing up with ketchup. So when I have guests over and they decide to use the bathroom, they will see this bottle and have a moment of cognitive dissonance, "This [Soap Bottle] in the [Bathroom] is labelled [Ketc
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    Via shiftythrifting
  • 3
    Text - duchessofostergotlands Ahir Shah @AhirShah Wonder if all historical crises were as boring as this one. My country is on the brink of real, tangible catastrophe and I'm just, like, ona train 11:32 AM Mar 12, 2019 Twitter for iPhone Brexit in a nutshell sleepyfireball The world is so fucked I didn't know which country this was talking about until "Brexit" Source: duchessofostergotlands
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    Via sleepyfireball
  • 4
    Text - adzolotl you call it "really bad at darts", I call it freestyle acupuncture sailor--spoon Sir I'm going to have to ask you to leave the bar
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    Via shaunabearr
  • 5
    Text - nerdibi there is carnival music faintly playing somewhere in my house. i've walked through the whole place and can't find a source it isn't louder in any one spot it is just evenly, eerily faint carnival music everywhere nerdibi Hey guys like 8 years after this post was made, I have learned that i have experienced auditory hallucinations for the majority of my life
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    Via Nerdibi
  • 6
    Text - Dylan Reneau @DylanReneau Unpopular opinion: cookie dough is worth taking the risk of getting salmonella @mememang @logancooper14 Dylan pull yourself together and go get a damn spoon. It's cookie dough not a beefy 5 layer burrito have some class lorem64 I'm so confused why he would think cookie dough would give him salmonella??? What parent told him this. There's no chicken in there! ankaa-avarshina Two words: Raw eggs. lorem64 ?? What kind of world do you live in where Raw eggs carry sal
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    Via Tumblr
  • 7
    Collage - Meteorologist Jennifer Myers This is what happens when you post a link to a $23 dress on Amazon to a female meteorologist Facebook group. More that 50 of us purchased the dress, so if you travel and watch the news, you might see something familiar... 6 hours ago near Dallas, TX ww SAT-RAD STO KPO AUGURN Co NEWSOM MYERS EUPAULA er celestialshawty This is actually really cute I love it pixel-sylveon 4
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  • 8
    Text - truestoriesaboutme: haillordsauron: castlestark: I can't wait until our generation becomes teachers that actually know how to make a video full screen and get the god damn cursor out of the way Lol cut to 15 years later* "Miss, you have to make the hologram 3D." "What? Hold on, I'm trying to full screen this. Where's the cursor?" "There is no cursor, Miss. Flick your wrist to make the hologram 3D." "And that'll fullscreen it?" entire class sighs*
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  • 9
    Text - dangermat when bananas rot they secrete stuff that makes other fruit including bananas near them rot faster that's so fucked up that is murder suicide bananas commit murder suicide chafing-nipples that's pretty fucking metal tickettoheaven I'd say it's pretty fucking bananas
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    Via dangermat
  • 10
    Text - psychoticpingouins: 48 years ago a girl said "oh fuck me" to her best friend while walking in the street, a guy who randomly passed by answered by "let me at least buy you dinner first". I present to you my grandparents, in love since then and celebrating their 47 years of marriage today. grandpa got game
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  • 11
    Text - rue-by-another-name the biggest lie i ever told & how my husband came to protect it for years i have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and don't really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don't like peanut butter they'd get all defensive like peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?I" and then i'd have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds but then i got tired of it and sta
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    Via runbyanothername
  • 12
    Text - some character design that makes me go absolutely apeshit is the whole wide mouth almond face shape cutey reptile. like i see a fucking animated reptile with a big mouth and eyes like a quarter mile apart and i just lose my mind themightynein this shit is PREMIUM YOU CANT GET BETTER DESIGN themightynein #they're friend shaped!
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    Via Tumblr
  • 13
    Text - just-shower-thoughts Let's all take a moment and thank biology that our internal organs don't itch. thatonenerdgirl Fun fact: digestion is actually really painful but your brain just tells you it's fine the same way it tells you not to bite off your fingure even though you can topshelfbottom that's... frustrating tenacious-bri Hey quick question why the FUCK doesn't it do that for menstrual cramps mobius-ofc Cause you bitches took the apple Source: just-shower-thoughts
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  • 14
    Text - chinon my wife: actively pushing out our baby me: holding my phone with cafeastrology[dot]com open in the browser and staring at the clock, ready to calculate its birth chart any minute now midtown120blues my wife struggles to keep the baby in for just five more minutes at 11:55pm on april 20th just so we can avoid having to raise an aries obovoid are you telling me you'd rob your child of being born on 4/20 because of astrology cutie-quinn Have you met an aries? Source: chinon 102,187 no
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  • 15
    Text - My boyfriend explains how periods work. Him: So, for a month your uterus is all like "oh! We might have a visitor! Let's make everything all welcoming and comfortable in here with soft cozy pillows" and then a month goes by and the visitor never shows up. You so much time uterus gets mad. Real mad. "We spend a phone cal1 Throw it all away! planning...and not I never want to see these pillows again!" So all the pillows fall out of your vagina even Him: Except the pillows are made of blood.
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