23 Hardcore Dad-Isms Culled From The Depths Of Twitter

Author image for Ada Elder
Ada Elder
Apr 10, 2019 3:00 PM EDT

Most humans with senses of humor can appreciate a good dad joke. They'll either make you laugh or roll your eyes - both reactions are strangely satisfying. Dad expert and Twitter personality @thedad has been dropping tweets that exemplify sh*t Dads say, and the rest of the social media site decided to follow in kind. The results will leave you feeling personally attacked whether or not you're an actual father.

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  • 01
    Room - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "it's always in the last place you look"
    via @thedad
  • 02
    Text - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "don't let the bed bugs bite" as the most terrifying way of comforting children before they go to sleep
    via @thedad
  • 03
    Land vehicle - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love telling kids "oh no they're comin for ya" when they hear police sirens 0
    via @thedad
  • 04
    Games - 7 THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love teaching kids how to play 52 Card Pickup
    via @thedad
  • 05
    Product - Chk 8401 Sep18' 10 08:3 o 18/1 THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "what's the damage?" before looking at a bill SUDTOtal HST 5 HST Total 2- Please Pay Your Server Thark You For your Busines
    via @thedad
  • 06
    Product - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "they don't make em like they used to" after anything breaks for any reason whatsoever
    via @thedad
  • 07
    Product - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "guess it's free then" if a cashier has trouble scanning an item a d
    via @thedad
  • 08
    Countertop - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "well that was fast" when someone leaves to go somewhere but comes right back in because they forgot something
    via @thedad
  • 09
    Text - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "you make a better door than you do a window" when someone is standing in front of the TV
    via @thedad
  • 10
    Product - Froet Fas THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love commenting on the gas prices as soon as they arrive in a different city
    via @thedad
  • 11
    Vehicle - The Dad THE DAD Follow @thedad Dads love saying "that's how they get ya" when advertisers reveal a hidden fee. NET VALUE AFTER FEDERAL TAX SAVINGS 2013 Nissan LEAFS as low as $21,300 net value, after tax savings. MSRP $28,800, with federal t vings from 0 to $7.500, This intormation is provided for informational purposes only Its subect to c and does not Constiute tax advice All persons considering use of available rebates and incertives sh professional to determine eliltypeciamount of
    via @thedad
  • 12
    Font - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love asking kids "you got this one?" when the check comes
    via @thedad
  • 13
    Vehicle door - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "saddle up partner" to getting in the car
    via @thedad
  • 14
    Vehicle - BAR goodmemethanks Egoodmemethanks Follow Dads love saying "it's not that heavy, it's just bulky" when they lift something too heavy
    via @thedad
  • 15
    Land vehicle - Neopolitan Rainforest Follow @thiccarmadillo Dads love saying "And we're off" after pulling out of the driveway
    via @thedad
  • 16
    Text - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "don't spend it all in one place" after giving a kid a very small amount of money RICA 214550K
    via @thedad
  • 17
    Product - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying "no your other right" when someone mistakes left for right
    via @thedad
  • 18
    Motor vehicle - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love passing up a close parking spot because they incorrectly think they'll find one that's even closer
    via @thedad
  • 19
    Dish - Brad Hoftyzer @bradhoftyzer Follow dads love saying "that hit the spot" after drinking eating literally anything
    via @thedad
  • 20
    Product - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love saying, "Guess we're playing phone tag!" on a voicemail
    via @thedad
  • 21
    Hardwood - THE DAD The Dad ethedad Follow Dads love asking coworkers if they are workin hard or hardly workin
    via @thedad
  • 22
    Product - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love answering the phone, "yelllllow
    via @thedad
  • 23
    Sky - THE DAD The Dad @thedad Follow Dads love telling you they heard it might be in the 60s next week
    via @thedad

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dads kids bad jokes dad jokes funny tweets funny
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