Jared Fogle's admission of deviant charges makes everyone feel as gross as if they'd actually eaten a Subway sandwich.
Just leave it to the New York Post to make a joke that your uncle would say at Thanksgiving dinner about the whole nasty business.
It does what comes the most natural to us denizens of the Internet — joking away the discomfort.
Joking on this monster of a person has resulted in everything from witty nostalgia:
Or if you just want some good, old-fashioned schadenfreude, here are some of the earliest commercials involving the disgusting creep in question.