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01
Still haven’t heard from Jerry, so I’ve been driving by his house every 10 minutes to check if he’s home. There is no sign of him. I’m sure he must be on a yoga retreat without any phone signal.
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02
I’m super nervous. Janet’s arriving tomorrow, so I’m meeting Jerry for a coffee and to discuss our future. I’m wearing hot pink. It’s his favourite colour...
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03
I’m catching up with Jerry tomorrow to see if we can rekindle our relationship. I’ve let myself go a bit, so I’ve just whizzed down to my local salon to have my facial hairs trimmed and bleached.
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04
I’m back in Adelaide. Spent the day drinking organic juice and generally looking fabulous.Today I’m wearing my McLaren Blue tartan jumpsuit, available on Etsy. It’s so on trend right now.
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05
We’re off to the Customs and Immigration Office. I’m trying to secure some sort of sponsorship deal for Janet so she can return to Australia as a Miggy employee. Isn’t that a fabulous idea? It’s a long drive so Billy’s navigating.
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06
Filling out Janet’s paperwork today. I’ve got to the section where I have to list all of her positive attributes that will be of benefit to society. For the life of me, I can’t think of a single one.
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07
Even when I’m working at the shop I still find time to practise my poses.
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08
I’m slightly alarmed. I have sent Jerry 348 text messages today and have not had a single response. I am hoping he just has his phone switched off. I am sure this is all a big misunderstanding, and I will be back in his arms by nightfall.
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09
It’s lovely that I’ve got time during the holidays to catch up with my brother for coffee and a chat. His conversation skills are still lacking though so we had quite a few awkward silences.
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