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Gems Of True Wisdom From Our Hero, Ron Swanson

NBC's beloved Parks and Recreation has been off the air for nearly five years, but some things last forever. Ron Swanson and his wisdom are pretty much immortal in our book. Instead of whining about the state of television and the demise of our favorite show, we take solace in these quotes from the burly man's man that is Ron Swanson. Nobody's been able to make being a misanthropic breakfast-lover look so damn good.

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  • 1
    People - I'm hungry. Ok, well, don't be such a baby. I- Cooked you some bacon for a trail snack. I ate it already. What? I Could smell it in your purse before I even parked my car. And now it's gone, and I hate everything.
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  • 2
    Tree - Fishing relaxes me. It's like yoga except I still get to kil something. -Ron Swanson NBC.COM
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    Meal - THERE'S BEEN A MISTAKE Youlve accidentally given me the food that my food eats -Ron Swanson PARKS NS
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    Text - NEVER HALF-ASS TWO THINGS. WHOLE-ASS ONE THING.
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  • 5
    Facial expression - And l have the number eight. Thats a party platter It serves 12 people. I know what I'm about, son
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    Photo caption - Ron, would you like some salad? Since l am not a rabbit, no,I MTLGANOdo not
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  • 8
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    Facial expression - STEA When people get too chummy with me I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't really care about them
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    Photo caption - (GASPS) Why would anybody ever eat anything besides breakfast food? People are idiots, Leslie.
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  • 14
    News - TODAY Any dog under fifty pounds is a cat and cats are useless.
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    Facial expression - That's why the only contract I've ever signed is my Mulligans Steakhouse Club Card. And even then I used a fake name. Les. Les Vegetables.
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  • 17
    Games - You're literally listening to turkey calls. Is this not rap? MemeCenter memecenter.com
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  • 18
    Photo caption - Tom put all my records into this rectangle. IN141 YS The songs just play one right after the other. This is an excellent rectangle. TH WINTER O IN 14 DAYS
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  • 19
    Facial expression - The less I know about other people's affairs, the happier I am. I'm not interested about caring about people. I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes.
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  • 20
    Facial expression - imple C Simpic Sip 40 clear alcohols are for rich women on diets. Citytv
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    Food - " call this turf 'n' turf. It's a 16 oz T-bone and a 24 oz porterhouse. Also, whisky and a cigar. I am going to consume all of this at the same time because I am a free American."
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  • 23
    Facial expression - 'm a simple man. I like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food.
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