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Twitter Users Who Are Seriously Way Cooler Than The Rest Of Us

These Twitter users are seriously so much cooler than we'll ever be. 

Ameatball Posted by Ameatball
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  • 1
    Text - Jax Follow @Diamond Jax (l am 6 months pregnant) Me after ordering my coffee: Stranger at Starbucks: you know you should be drinking decaf when you're pregnant. Me: I'm.... not pregnant. Stranger: (horrified) I am so, so sorry! And that's what you get for giving unsolicited advice. 7:13 AM - 2 Aug 2019 78,845 Retweets 704,324 Likes >
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    Via @Diamond_Jax
  • 2
    Text - Dan LaMorte Follow @DanLaMorte There's a girl in front of me on the bus having full FaceTime call outloud with her parents so I put my face in the camera and said, "Honey, I had no idea I was meeting your parents today." I will enter your personal life if you enter my personal space. 4:20 PM 14 Dec 2018
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    Via @DanLaMorte
  • 3
    Text - Jessie Follow @mommajessiec Before you spend $200 on birthday party entertainment for your child, I sprayed my son and his friends for 45 minutes with the hose. Rave reviews. 4:28 AM 27 May 2018 7,188 Retweets 47,433 Likes
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    Via @mommajessiec
  • 4
    Text - Sassparilla @Megatronic13 Follow My kid got invited to a birthday party and I don't like that kid's mom so I bought a musical instrument set that includes a drum, recorder, and a harmonica. I'll see you in hell, Bethany. 1:06 PM 27 Jan 2019 1,517 Retweets 19,920 Likes
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    Via @Megatronic13
  • 5
    Text - Ehi Enabs Follow @ehienabs 46GB of Game of Thrones I downloaded is in fucking french. I'm about to learn French, oui oui bitch 5:57 AM 12 Feb 2019 8,212 Retweets 16,951 Likes
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    Via @ehienabs
  • 6
    Text - carol Follow @venmo4feet My favorite way of establishing dominance is to spend hours cleaning my entire room and then say "sorry it's so messy" when people come in 8:08 PM 23 Mar 2019 8,275 Retweets 87,577 Likes
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    Via @venmo4feet
  • 7
    Text - joshmosh @diss guy Follow My dad told my sisters new boyfriend to stand at the end of the picture so he can crop him out when she dumped him. I'm still cracking up. 5:48 PM - 4 Aug 2019 2,519 Retweets 18,451 Likes
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    Via @diss_guy
  • 8
    Text - Brad Polumbo Follow @brad_polumbo My car is stranded in a snowstorm. AAA won't get me, the police won't come unless I'm in danger..... Uber will be here in two minutes. I love capitalism. 6:42 PM - 17 Feb 2018 1,346 Retweets 6,521 Likes
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    Via @brad_polumbo
  • 9
    Text - Brandon Bradford Follow @BrandonLBradfor I'm eating breakfast at the busy restaurant below my apartment. A lovely young woman just asked me if I could "hurry up and finish my breakfast, my friend is coming in 15 minutes and we want to take your seat." So, I'll be here for the rest of today. 9:07 AM - 9 Feb 2019 46,780 Retweets 305,978 Likes
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    Via @BrandonLBradfor
  • 10
    Text - т Follow @SteviPressman My mom-mom got pulled over the other night. Turns out she had an unpaid ticket from 22 years ago so and took her to the police station. When she left, she turned to the cop and said, "Handcuffing a 72 yr old? I hope you have diarrhea for the rest of your life" they handcuffed her 10:29 AM 28 Jun 2018 882 Retweets 13,515 Likes
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    Via @SteviPressman
  • 11
    Text - Alisha Rai Follow @AlishaRai I just remembered the time I was dating a British man and I was annoyed at him about something so I deliberately made my tea in the microwave while staring him right in the eyes 3:32 PM -9 Jan 2019 8,211 Retweets 88,391 Likes
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    Via @AlishaRai
  • 12
    Text - wittyidiot @stephenszczerba Follow Never give 100% at work, they'll expect that everyday- always give 50%, so when you give 25% they'll just think you're having an off day and if you ever give 75% they'll give you a raise 10:32 AM 12 Aug 2019
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    Via @stephenszczerba
  • 13
    Text - Nicole Follow @nicoleslaaww My Uber profile says I'm deaf so when I get into Uber's usually just sign hello to them and don't speak anymore but this Uber driver just called someone and said "this deaf bitch just got in so I can talk for a minute" Imfaoooo0 6:40 AM - 10 Jul 2019 from Chicago, IL 95,208 Retweets 593,472 Likes
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    Via @nicoleslaaww
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