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Weird Things Kids Asked Mall Santas for Christmas

Kids are weird and dumb. Sometimes they get really specific thoughts stuck in their head and given the choice to ask for anything they could ever want, will choose to ask for something like a box of kleenex or a really old pug. Here are some strange experiences for the holiday season.

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  • 1
    Text - masochisticminx 3.4k points · 3 days ago My 3 year old son asked Santa once for "a baby rhino" Santa told him that "The baby rhinos mama would be very sad to lose her baby though" Then my son said, "okay, well I'll take the mama too, maybe she can sleep in my moms bed"
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  • 2
    Text - taydin 2.4k points · 3 days ago My 9 yr old kid asked for lightbulbs. I am sure Santa wasn't expecting that.
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  • 3
    Text - peterfahy 2.2k points · 3 days ago I once asked for "an elf to keep as a slave"
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  • 4
    Text - SeanBlaise 1.3k points · 3 days ago Not a Santa, not even an elf, but my older sister is an elf this year, and a 6 year old boy said that he just wanted Man United to win the league. What's best is that the Santa said "I can't work miracles now kid"
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  • 5
    Text - yuwannano 852 points · 3 days ago My kid asked santa for Thor's hammer. Christmas morning he opens up Thor's hammer. So happy. First thing he did was chuck it across the living room and into the kitchen. Dishes smash, glass all over the floor. Kid was fucking pissed it didn't come back to him. The look on his face. Pure Christmas devastation.
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  • 6
    Text - vo0g 31.5k points · 4 days ago O S Reindeer eggs so he could start his own franchise.
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  • 7
    Text - LPGeoteacher 27.1k points · 4 days ago Many years ago a small girl would not tell her mother what she wanted for Christmas. Mom told me the problem and I was to tell her after the kid jumped off my lap. The little girl hopped up and told me she wanted some make up and some tits.. ok now I have to tell mom.
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  • 8
    Text - Simulated_Narwhal 32.6k points · 3 days ago 3 After waiting two hours in line my daughter asked Santa for a hot dog.
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  • 9
    Text - The Calico_Jack 22.5k points · 3 days ago S A... My uncle was a Santa and he told me that one year a kid asked for a coffee maker because he wanted to start his own Starbucks coffee stand instead of a lemonade stand. Apparently business was not very good as a lemonade stand but he noticed a lot of adults drink coffee, so he'd make coffee. That kid is probably a millionaire now.
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  • 10
    Text - blue4t 16.3k points · 3 days ago I know the weirdest thing I asked for was a pen that could write like a pen, pencil, marker, and crayon. I'd never seen one but was sure Santa could make it. I got a 4 color pen instead.
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  • 11
    Text - VictorCrowne 16.1k points · 3 days ago O S Was a Santa at a party last week. A kid asked for a whistle that she could blow at night to wake her mom up and scare her when she was sleeping. I said "No, that would put you on the Naughty list, let your mom sleep you little gremlin." Mom laughed.
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  • 12
    Text - WaldOFound 14.1k points · 4 days ago S So literally last night we took my kids to see Santa and when asked what she wants for Christmas she says, "A Surprise." Santa was so surprised he didn't know what to say.
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  • 13
    Text - Wonderfulandstrange 12.1k points · 3 days ago My sister asked Santa for "Black Men" for Christmas. She meant "Men in Black."
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  • 14
    Text - Candy_Acid 10.3k points · 3 days ago Not a Santa, but I have been a Mrs. Claus for the last few years and I always ask the kids what they want while we do our crafts. My favorite was this 4-5 year old girl that told me she wanted "one of those loud horns". She made a gesture like she was using those canned air horns and she made a little horn sound. She said she wants to use it to wake up her baby brother when he naps in the daytime so he "knows what it's like."
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  • 15
    Text - CountVonBenning 10.1k points · 3 days ago S For me to "stop upholding this charade"
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  • 16
    Text - witch_and_famous 8.0k points · 4 days ago G I was a Santa in 1997 for a small, authentic Old-West village. I was 17 at the time and doing some local theater and the costume lady was asked to find someone to be Santa for the weekend. She told me she thought of me because "well you're not FAT, but you're big" (I'm 6'6"/1.98). So I put on a cheap costume that didn't fit well and the beard smelled like the last Santa threw up in it, and I waited in a prop shed in the plaza that was normally a
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  • 17
    Text - hipcatcoolcap 7.4k points · 3 days ago · edited 3 days ago When he was feeling better my FIL looked just like a real santa. I used to mess with him around Christmas when we were out and about with a quick "Rudolf needs to get back to the pole, we need to hurry" I got a lot of really great looks from kids. The best was a shy little girl that came up and asked for some specific doll. Without missing a beat he says "I'm not sure what the heck that is but I'll have Legolas look into it" he al
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  • 18
    Text - Angelbot1000 7.4k points · 4 days ago Not a mall santa my friend was one. He said that the weirdest thing he heard from a kid was a husband for his mom.
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  • 19
    Text - Navy-H 5.4k points · 3 days ago Not a mall Santa but once my sister asked Santa if she could have a horses head and an ice cream cone. She explained that she was gonna paint the ice cream cone the colour of the horse, stick it on, mount the horses head to the wall and tell her friends she killed a unicorn. She doesn't remember.
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  • 20
    Text - FrostySausage 5.2k points · 3 days ago I once asked for bread with no crust. Come Christmas Day, I actually got an entire loaf of bread with no crust.
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  • 21
    Text - DoddsWill1 4.3k points · 3 days ago Not a santa but an elf. I read a letter (maybe I shouldn't have) from a child who asked for a dolphin, specifically not autistic. Not sure if he had had a bad experience with disabled dolphins or what but he was about 6 years old.
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  • 22
    Text - AllLinesDown 3.7k points · 4 days ago I once asked Santa for my parents to get a divorce.
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  • 23
    Text - TheBionicleApple 3.6k points · 4 days ago · edited 4 d I'm not a mall santa, but I heard this kid say: sex doll you should have seen his parents face
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