BlueBird1208

Me: Mum, does childbirth hurt? Mum: Yes, it's like s**tting a pineapple.

*pulling up to a McDonald's drive thru* Dad: Can I get a sweet tea with lemon? Employee: Will t...

*talking to me about sex* Grandma: You know, my first time with your grandpa sounded like "plok ...

me: *sitting with my friends at Starbucks after school, none of them had ever met my dad before* ...

Mom: What's with all the beaver jokes? Me: Apparently, it's another word for vagina. Mom: What?...

Grandma: I only wear my bra when I wear my teeth.

My dad said: I dont understand the migratory patterns of Mexican cheese!

Dad: So I was in the shower this morning, and I was thinking about Doctor Who. *spaces off*