jenthehostess

Mum: How do you turn this shakey thing on my iPhone off? Me: You answer Dad. He's calling you.

(Watching television with my mother, there's something about penguins.) Mum: Aww they're so cute...

(My Mom was driving me to the local park, so that I could have a walk around.) Mom: Are you sure...

(At a store and I'm trying to decide on a card for my friend's b-day) Mom: (walking really fast ...

Mom (leaving a message on my grandpa's phone): Call back, it's your favorite daughter. Grandpa: ...

Mom: What are you doing? Me: Trying to figure out how to post something on FailBlog. Mom: What ...

*My dad and I were at the mall and some guy was handing out free samples of their new fudge* Fre...

Dad: Selena, do you have my remote? Me: Uhhh, no. It's on your lap Dad: My bad, my stomach was ...

Dad: Don't they inject butt fat into lips to make them look bigger? Sister: Yeah Dad: So when y...

Mom: *Getting home from Apple store* Look at this new iPhone cover I got. It's a Croc, and I can ...

(I am a 15 year old female, and my grandma just asked me if I cuss) Me:...Yeah... Grandma: Fait...

Dad: I will never be happy again. (2 seconds later)-Proceeds to rip a giant fart. Dad: Maybe I ...

(My dad and I talking about our funerals) Me: You know what dad? Dad: Hmm? Me: I want to have...