CheezCake

My Dating Nightmare: Guy Stuffs His Face, Leaving Me Starving

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  • I’ve been on some bad dates but this one takes the cake.

    Blond - Oh, this is bad.

    I gave Marc, a 'concierge consultant', the 'ol right swipe, and after exchanging information he invited me for a cocktail and a bite to eat around happy hour one evening.

    Marc suggested a bar on 42nd street, essentially in the middle of Times Square. I thought this was particularly peculiar because anyone who lives in New York City desperately abstains from going near this area at all costs. Being the assertive New Yorker that I am, I mentioned that maybe we could elect to go somewhere not so touristy.

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  • Marc wanted to take us to his work event in Times Square. I wasn't keen.

    Forehead - Sure. Fine. Whatever.

    "Well, I have this event for the concierge's industry. I figured we could just swing by there as I should really make an appearance then we can go somewhere else," he suggested.

    I did think accompanying to an industry event was a bad idea for a first date, but for the sake of not being difficult, to Times Square I went.

  • We went anyway, and there was an open bar. Yay!

    Hair - ΟΚΑΥ INE !! #TeachersSeries

    When I arrived at the event for the hotel concierge's 'union' of NYC it was very crowded but had an open bar, so I wasn't complaining. Marc worked at a high-end hotel in the city and mentioned he also owned his own 'consulting firm. I barely got a word in about myself between him mingling with colleagues and speaking about his own supposed successful ventures in the concierge industry.

  • I couldn't get a word in. And, I was starving.

    Photography - Does anyone care that I'm hungry and I haven't eaten and I'm gonna pass out?

    At this point, I noticed a waitress with a tray of meatball sliders circulating the room, and before I could make it through the crowd they had all been devoured. I mentioned to Marc (several times) that I was feeling pretty ravenous and how I wanted to keep an eye out for the next waitress that came around. Several times I saw a tray being passed but was never quite quick enough to snatch myself a scrumptious meatball.

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  • It was impossible to get food. Suddenly, his friend approached with two sliders...

    Jacket - CELEBRITY GETME CUTOF HEREI

    "Ugh!" I said to Marc. "I am dying to get one of those sliders! I am so hungry."

    At that moment an acquaintance of Marc's approached us to greet him, with two delectable, untouched sliders on his cocktail napkin.

    "Oh man, you were lucky you were quick enough to grab one," Marc said. "We have been trying but no luck!"

  • Marc shoved one down his throat, and his friend ate the other one.

    Hair - WHAT KINDA BULLSHIT ISTHAT?

    Marc's friend then obligingly picked up one of the sliders and handed it to Marc. I began to salivate with excitement over the delicious meatball slider I was about to ravage.

    Marc took the slider…

    and shoved the entire thing straight into his mouth.


    Wow. What a gentleman.

  • My hanger was reaching it's limit.

    Facial expression - ShaytarddS I AM HUNGRY!

    An hour and a half and two more glasses of wine later and this date went from bad to worse. 

    I was rather bored pretending to be interested in all the conversations being had around me and my hanger (hunger + anger) began to set in. I told Marc if he wanted to stay at the event he could do so, but I was going to head somewhere to get a bite to eat.

    "No, wait!! Just 10 more minutes and we can go get something to eat, I promise!"

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  • FINALLY, we went to get food (at his place of employment).

    People - YES!

    After we exited the hotel Marc suggested a place right around the corner. We entered the lounge area of the establishment, and I noticed all the waiters saying hello to him. It turned out to be Marc's place of employment.

  • I sat there eating in silence, because he was too busy with his coworkers.

    Junk food - I'm in love. I'm having a relationship with my pizza.

    We sat at the bar and again, I barely spoke because Marc was too busy speaking to his coworkers. We ordered some appetizers, and the distractions were welcome because I was so busy stuffing my face with coconut shrimp and parmesan truffle fries. 

  • Then came the check. I offered to go Dutch...

    Blond - GUTE ARBEIT

    After we finished I offered to split the check considering I knew I would never see Marc again and didn't want to be under any sort of obligation.

    Marc refused and excused himself to go check on something. He returned 15 minutes later.

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  • He failed to get a discount for the food, despite working there. He happily accepted my offer.

    Head

    "Hey so, do you actually mind splitting the check after all? I thought the manager that I am pretty tight with would be here and he would have comped my entire check but he's not and I only get a 50% discount." 

    I relinquished my Visa into the billfold and anxiously awaited the return of our server.

  • The next day, he asked to see me again. No thanks, slider stealer!

    Face - DATING MAKES ME WANT TO EAT MY FEELINGS

    As we signed our checks Marc said, "Well, I thought I was going to get through the night without spending any money at all, but I guess $25 isn't so bad, right?"

    Marc texted me a day later telling me that he was looking forward to doing it again.

    Good luck, Marc.

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