The Best Of White People Twitter This Week

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  • 01
    Text - Ryan Reynolds @VanCityReynolds Black Mirror really outdid themselves this time. Having us experience season 6 instead of watching it on Netflix. Outstanding. 9/1/20, 11:24 AM
  • 02
    Text - David K. @DavidKPiano Facebook is extremely over-engineered for a birthday reminder app 18:53 · 29 Aug 20 · Twitter Web App 2,392 Retweets and comments 17.6K Likes
  • 03
    Text - Catturd TM @catturd2 It's freaking 2020. Why can't they make cereal with a ziplock bag inside the box? 3:52 PM Sep 2, 2020 · Twitter Web App 8.6K Retweets 763 Quote Tweets 57.1K Likes >
  • 04
    Text - Sophia Cadogan @sophiacadogan Anyone else rip their mask off when they get in to the car like they've just finished a disappointing surgery on Grey's Anatomy
  • 05
    Text - Matthew Phillion @mattphillion I keep thinking l wouldn't mind the cooler weather to kick in but I don't want to get too enthusiastic about it becausel am 100% sure this is the year we will get flammable snow 6:01 PM · 9/4/20 · Twitter Web App
  • 06
    Text - Eileen Mary O'Connell O @i_Lean Thinking about the time that l said that I was distantly related to Marie Curie and a guy explained "It's pronounced Mariah Carey" 1:08 AM · 9/1/20 Twitter for iPhone
  • 07
    Text - Chad Read @squirrel74wkgn Seems like the "how to use a fire extinguisher" video on YouTube shouldn't have a 30 second ad before it. 4:44 PM · 2018-07-17 · Twitter for iPhone 2,393 Retweets 34 Quote Tweets 7,118 Likes
  • 08
    Text - Luke Mones @LukeMones being a baby's like being blacked out. you dont remember anything, but people show you pictures like "that was you. you threw up right after this" >
  • 09
    Text - David @dw00dz In my hungover state I went food shopping. Reached for a pack of sausages & someone reached at the same time so l stepped back & said "sorry you go ahead". I then realised l'd actually seen my own arm in a mirror & had apologised to myself in front of a lady handing out samples
  • 10
    Text - sad cowboy emoji @TheNewEternity The fact that Netflix deleted Always Sunny, Futurama, and American Dad but spent $100 million to keep Friends makes me irrationally angry
  • 11
    Text - » Erin @erinmarie093 One time my college roommate was having a guy over and was sitting there wearing footie Grinch pajamas, glasses, retainers, no makeup.. and she goes, "you gotta weed em out early by being your ugliest right off the bat" They're now married with two kids. 02.49 · 04/09/2020 from Aberdeen, SD · Twitter for iPhone 2.055 Retweets 220 Quote Tweets 48,9K Likes
  • 12
    Dog breed - WeRateDogsTM @dog_rates This is Todd. He saved his human from a rattlesnake yesterday. A true h*ckin hero. He's expected to make a full recovery and has been rewarded our fifth ever 15/10
  • 13
    Text - Scott Dodds @itsBOMBARDIER me at 14: can't wait to travel the whole world once i'm earning my own money me now: mustn't forget that tupperware at work, it's my only one
  • 14
    Text - Michael @Home_Halfway Just had a great conversation with my cat. We discussed the following: 1. Is he a little baby 2. He is in fact a little baby 3. The fact that he's very cute 4. The origin of how he got to be so cute 5. Why he is so little 6. Details as to how he's a good boy
  • 15
    Text - @nicksonpt2 What is one thing that became more clear as you got older? Nick-Fil-A @nicksonr why the Grinch wanted to live alone with his dog
  • 16
    Text - Christian Galiani @ChristianGalia1 i like keeping my metabolism on its toes. Like what's it gonna be today, complete starvation or 6,000 calories.
  • 17
    Text - skramz @DaRoan i wish dads took "#1 Dad" shirts seriously and fought each other whenever they saw another dad wearing one
  • 18
    Face - Gravelord NEETO @coherentstates How is it that the Madame Tussauds wax model of Mark Zuckerberg looks way more like a real person than Mark Zuckerberg does? Oh my god
  • 19
    Text - Luke Ottenhof @lukeottenhof my roommate started vaping to quit smoking but now he vapes too much so he's started smoking again to quit vaping. incredible >
  • 20
    Text - sexy commie 2 @ayynicko no pronouns. do not refer to me ever
  • 21
    Text - Michael McKean O @MJMC.e. · 17h Right, because all bread is digital now. Theo Priestley @tprstly · 4d I bet nobody under 40 knows what this is. Show this thread
  • 22
    Text - schmox @lvoryGazelle [inventing the toaster] engineer: Ok it burns the bread if you put it at 4 chief engineer: perfect. Make it go up to 8
  • 23
    Text - human aaron @humanaaron Behind every great man is the drawer I need to get into why are you even in the kitchen right now

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