Girlfriend Spends Minimal Effort On Boyfriend's Gift, Boyfriend Gets Sad

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mattstaff
Jan 31, 2021 10:00 PM EST

This guy asked the folks in Reddit's AITA community whether or not he was in the wrong for his reaction to learning that his girlfriend basically got him the same kind of gift that she gets anyone else in her life who she doesn't want to spend too much time and money on. With what might be no big surprise at all, people seem to be in collective agreement that it was a pretty lousy move on the part of the girlfriend. 

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  • 01
    Text - AITA for being angry about a gift my gf gave me? Not the A-hole So some months ago my girlfriend and I had our 1 year anniversary, and of course we exchanged a gift. She hinted me that she would have loved a ring, nothing too crazy, and I got her a ring. In addition to that a big frame with 12 picture in it, one picture from every month we've been together (yes I know it may sound lame lol). I'm a sort of minimalist and I don't really have anything I need so when she asked me if there was
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  • 02
    Text - All good until some days before christmas, she has two close friends and she didn't know what kind of gift to give them, I suggested i couple of ideas but she said it was a waste of money (around 10€, keep in mind she lives with her mom and gets 500€ from her dad every month). And then she said what got me a little angry: "I'll do the thing I do when I don't want to spend money and time on a gift, I'll just buy two cheap frame at the chinese shop, print a couple of photos and I don't have
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  • 03
    Text - Now some time has past, I'm not angry, but I feel sad about the whole thing. Am I the asshole for getting angry and sad about the whole situation? EDIT Since a lot of you are concerned about it, i'd like to clear that by saying "I should reevaluate" | don't mean to straight up dump her. EDIT 2 Sorry I can't reply to everyone, it went out of control! A lot of you have ask this, I'm 22 she's 23. 4 10.1k 3 Q 800 1, Share
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  • 04
    Text - gooberfaced • 1d • Professor Emeritass [70] NTA for being ticked off and then sad. The fact that she admitted to your face that she had just given you her standard "not that important" treatment would tick me off too. It says to me that she just didn't want to bother and that's a painful thing to hear. Reply 1.4k
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  • 05
    Text - Fruit-Additional · 1d · Asshole Aficionado [13] S 7 Awards NTA. There's a very overused phrase that actually works here. When someone shows you who they are. Believe them. You've found out where you are in her life and how she feels. You can stay with her but you should keep this in mind. Reply 12.5k ... +
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  • 06
    Text - HelixFollower · 1d NTA - I was going to say that you are TA until I read ""'ll do the thing I do when I don't want to spend money and time on a gift, l'll just buy two cheap frame at the chinese shop, print a couple of photos and I don't have to think about it anymore"" Wow, that must've been painful to hear. Also, a frame with a picture for every month you've been together is really sweet. Reply 3.7k 3 ...
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  • 07
    Text - RageofAeons · 1d · Partassipant [3] NTA No! She literally just declared what she does when she gives no shits about a gift, and it just happens to perfectly match what she did for your anniversary? But "that's different"! 1. I hate that defense, it's essentially an admission of fault on the other parties end but somehow people seem to think that it's a blanket defense for being horrible. This sounds like it needs a much more serious conversation with some honesty involved from her end. Q
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  • 08
    Text - Mary-U · 1d · Partassipant [1] NTA But, after a year of being together, crappy gift giving isn't necessarily grounds for breaking up. It's grounds for a conversation. You tell her the thought and effort you put into gifts. Tell her you are hurt she doesn't seem to put the same thought and effort in. It feels like she doesn't care. Wait for her reply. Discuss.... Reply 65 3 ...
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  • 09
    Text - high_maintenance_gf • 1d NTA I was going to say you were the TA because you had told her that you'd be happy with anything she got you. Until this. "I'll do the thing I do when I don't want to spend money and time on a gift, l'll just buy two cheap frame at the chinese shop, print a couple of photos and I don't have to think about it anymore". It shows that she didn't want to spend money and time on a gift for you. Absolutely NTA É Q Reply 1 46 3 ...
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  • 10
    Text - Violet351 • 1d NTA. She had forgotten she had done the same to you Q Reply 16 ...
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  • 11
    Text - MamanBear79· 1d · Partassipant [1] NTA She put her foot in her mouth (as we say here) by indirectly telling you she couldn't be bothered with your gift. And no, it's not hard to buy for a minimalist. You can buy experiences, food, make jokey vouchers for free activities together if you're broke. Anything. l'd reevaluate that relationship, it has a "spoilt princess" flag over it Reply 1 11 + ...
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  • 12
    Text - StoatofDisarray • 1d NTA. It's the thought that counts and she's just shown you what she thinks of you. Reply 12 3 ...
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  • 13
    Text - ItsAllFinite • 1d · Partassipant [2] NTA. Sounds like she got too comfortable and accidentally let to truth slip out. Now she's trying to back paddle her way out. + Reply ...
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  • 14
    Text - foraged_mushrooms · 1d NTA !!! Honestly her gift couldve been such a good idea if she took the time to pick out four significant photos together, and wrote a little memory on the back of each photo before putting them in the frame for you to read. even something simple like that or putting hidden messages behind them ("this was the first time i realised i loved you" "remember we saw that cute little cat over here on this date too?" etc etc). her gift was thoughtless in all though, because
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  • 15
    Text - Remarkable_Sea_1062 · 1d · Partassipant [3] NTA. You have a crappy girlfriend. You're a caring, thoughtful man. Your girlfriend is letting you know how much she cares about you. Do you really want to waste more of your time, effort and money on her? Q Reply ...
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  • 16
    Text - firefightersgirl76• 1d NTA, appreciate her honesty and reevaluate your level of commitment vs hers. Reply ...
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  • 17
    Text - MariaCDS • 1d NTA but another time you should just say what you'd like for a present instead. Maybe the two of you shouldn't be together, her comment was not nice at alI! Reply ...
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  • 18
    Text - ThePrincessInsomniac · 1d NTA she basically admitted this is what she does when she isn't putting effort into the gift. I am not a good gift giver so I do get her side a bit but even if I fail the effort and thought make a difference. A romantic relationship is not one you should slack on or do your throwaway gift with no effort. Even the idea can be okay with some effort. My husband did similar when we were dating but he got a disposable camera and got friends to take pictures of us toge
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boyfriend drama relationships Reddit dating
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