Show Them Who's Boss At Work Via These Very Assertive Email Signatures

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abbyadler
Jun 16, 2021 7:00 PM EDT

Sometimes work gets way too routine, and we need to spice things up a little bit. We all send boring, predictable emails on a daily basis... if only there was a way to craft emails that could make our routine a tad more exciting. Lucky for us, a Redditor started a thread about how he could assert his dominance over his coworkers through adding new, unique content to his email signature, and fellow Redditors had some hilarious ideas. Looking to assert your dominance over your own coworkers? Check out what the Redditors had to offer below. 

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  • 01
    Organism - Posted by u/[deleted] 1 day ago How can I make my email signature even longer to exert dominance over my coworkers? he, job title, my email address, a My signature already consists of my name, picture of my company's logo and our “motto". The only thing I can think of adding is my phone number but I don't really want people to have that.
    via u/[deleted]

    I always sign my email off with "Best" because this shows my coworkers that I am, in fact, the best. 

  • 02
    Font - elitelevelmindset · 1d o put your Onlyfans link at the bottom with a 30% off code.
    via u/elitelevelmindset

    I didn't expect OnlyFans to make an appearance in this thread, yet here we are. 

  • 03
    Font - Stinky_Macaroni · 1d Put a disclaimer on the bottom regard data governance. Like: "The information contained in this email is only for use of the originally listed recipients. If you feel you received this message in error, please notify the sender and immediately delete the message and destroy any attachments." Or something equally long, boring, and obvious.
    via u/Stinky_Macaroni
  • 04
    Smile - palishkoto · 1d And a statement of corporate social responsibility, plus a 'think of the environment before printing this email' message.
    via u/palishkoto
  • 05
    Font - javiazarphoto · 1d Bane I think the ultimate flex is signing your first name and nothing else. Steve Jobs' email signature was "Steve".
    via u/javiazarphoto
  • 06
    Smile - cosmoboy · 1d e Have it display in a Klingon font and instead of phone number add a line that says issues will be solved through physical combat.
    via u/cosmoboy
  • 07
    Font - SmurfSmurfton · 1d "son of x and y", then add all that other stuff for them
    via u/SmurfSmurfton
  • 08
    Font - TheHumanRavioli · 1d Oh yes, include the whole family crest! With swords, lions and whole shebang. Dominance will be asserted for sure.
    via u/TheHumanRavioli
  • 09
    Font - LyricalPig · 1d make up fake certification abbreviations to add to your name. Eg. OP: DDR, CCS, MESY, CPP
    via u/LyricalPig
  • 10
    Font - dhottawa · 1d S Male.. Yo bro.. been there, done that. Why don't you add your dick measurements
    via u/dhottawa
  • 11
    Font - terrorcatmom · 1d Add an obnoxious quote in small text at the bottom
    via u/terrorcatmom
  • 12
    Human body - therankin · 1d Add a sock to the whole thing. If anyone tries to take your signature, all they'll get is a handful of sock.
    via u/therankin
  • 13
    Human body - OakAged · 1d I know someone that becam an ordained minister just so he could add reverend to his email signature. Think he did it online.
    via u/OakAged
  • 14
    Font - crazypotato2 · 1d Add your battlecry
    via u/crazypotato2
  • 15
    Human body - Asmodean129 · 1d Put a big ol picture of yourself. We have someone at my work that does that, and it certainly got everyone's attention!
    via u/Asmodean129

Tags

email work coworkers askreddit prank workplace askmen creativity in the workplace steve jobs
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