I Can Has Cheezburger?

National Dogs in Politics Day: Do Dogs Secretly Run America?

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    Nose - George Washington, the very first "president", had dozens of pups. He even bred the very first American Foxhound himself. He also gave all his dogs funny names like "Vulcan" and "Sweet Lips"

    It all started at the beginning of America with George Washington. Washington "owned" dozens of dogs and was very invested in his pets by all accounts. So I ask you this: how did he have time to run a country AND personally tend to a ton of animals? The answer is, obviously, he didn't. The dogs were the leaders, and they had to keep George close at all time to make sure he behaved.

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    Building - Lyndon B. Johnson reportedly had 8 dogs and loved to play with them. His favorite, Yuki (pictured here teaching LBJ the National Anthem in front of the ambassador to Britain), was found by his daughter at a gas station.
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    Dog - National Dogs in Politics Day commemorates the day Nixon brought his dog Checkers on camera to make himself look more sympathetic for a speech to get himself on the vice presidential ticket.

    National Dogs in Politics Day commemorates the day Nixon used his dog Checkers in a speech to get himself on the vice presidential ticket. But...let's take a look at that name. Not Presidents' Dogs Day. Not Dogs in the White House Day. Dogs in POLITICS Day. The secret beneath is clear: the dogs ARE the POLITICIANS! They just couldn't resist leaving a little trail of evidence in the name. The evidence is there if you look close!

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    Dog - While Checkers was the original Dog in Politics, he actually never lived in the White House. And it looks from this photo like he wasn't too happy about being so far from the action...

    Checkers helped get Nixon into office, but once he realized Nixon played dirty, he probably decided he needed to knock the sitting president off his chair. Just look how sinister he is here! I'm not saying Checkers was Deep Throat (the shadowy informant who exposed Nixon's cheating)...but Checkers was Deep Throat.

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    Dog - Nation leader Rob Roy, pictured here with his humans, the Coolidge Family. Said Calvin Coolidge, "any man who does not like dogs and want them about does not deserve to be in the White House."

    Sure, Coolidge SAID it...but did he really come up with it? Sounds to me more like a subtle way for dogs to discourage any humans who wouldn't bend to their will from running for president…

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    Smile - George Bush was often seen with his dog, Barney, on his lap or in his arms.

    THE DOG IS DRIVING! CLEARLY BUSH CAN'T DRIVE A CAR BY HIMSELF, THAT'S WHY HE HAS TO HAVE A DOG AT THE WHEEL! This is unequivocal proof that Barnie was really the one in charge! How can you not see this, people??

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    Dog - FDR had a German shepherd named Major. According to Business Insider: "A former police dog, Major caused an international incident in 1933 when he attacked the visiting British Prime Minister Ramsay MacDonald and nearly ripped his pants."

    Major attacked a foreign diplomat? There's only one reason a dog would do that: to stop Ramsay from exposing these political pups' secrets. And clearly this scare tactic worked: doggies continue to control their presidents to this day.

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    Dog - Pushinka was given to JFK as a gift by Soviet leader Khrushchev. She went on to have puppies! JFK had eight more dogs besides Pushinka.

    I mean, I think it's pretty clear Pushinka was a spy. This could probably shed some light on the mystery surrounding JFK's assassination too…

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    Building - Lucky, the pup from the Reagan era, pictured here making sure his humans get some exercise.
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    Dog - Laddie Boy was the first "celebrity dog" to live in the White House, with Warren G. Harding. He was known for bringing the President his morning paper every day...or was that just a cover for him giving Harding a daily schedule that the dog himself created??
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    Dog - Herbert Hoover's Belgian shepherd King Tut helped Hoover get elected by making him seem more approachable. He also patrolled the White House gates at night.
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    Dog - Grits, the border collie mix gifted to Jimmy Carter's daughter Amy by her teacher, was actually born the same day as Jimmy Carter won the election. Sounds like this pup was a pure-bred politician!

    Can't get enough of ICanHasCheezburger? Then you're in luck because we're now on Instagram!

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About the Author

Ruth F. is an academic and a millennial in every sense of the word. When she isn't toppling industries, she can be found drinking coffee, skating, or giving relationship advice to anyone who even hints at needing it.

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About the Author

Ruth F. is an academic and a millennial in every sense of the word. When she isn't toppling industries, she can be found drinking coffee, skating, or giving relationship advice to anyone who even hints at needing it.